<p>As title said, my S, he just doesn’t want to do any sports (except one spring JV last year) or involve any clubs or activities.</p>
<p>One of the reason he went to BS is because the chances of activities, but now, he just want to stay at his or his best friend’s room, read, chat, watch video or play games.</p>
<p>He was planed to join robotic club last year, but he told me the kids there seems so smart but not friendly, so he gave up. He only went to Latin twice or three time last year. </p>
<p>WHAT SHOULD I DO TO ENCOURAGE (OR FORCE) HIM TO DO SOMETHING?
Sometime I just hope he can go to the gym (at weekend), excise a little bit.
Is it alright for me to call his adviser or dorm head about my concern???</p>
<p>You should call his advisor, house counselor to make sure he is feeling OK. Some students who are used to being the best in their previous school could become depressed in a very competitive BS. Most BS I know require sports. I also do know of a case that a BS student excelled in computer games and won awards, created games and that helped him get into a college.</p>
<p>I take it that your son’s school does not require some sort of sport/art/leadership activity during the afternoon block after classes thus allowing him to return to his room? It sounds like his school is not actively engaged in getting him actively engaged in the school community. I’d definitely talk to the advisor and possibly the student life director. This does not speak well that the school is not getting the whole student educated. While yours may not be the easiest to engage, the school should be thorough enough in its interview screening to make sure only to take students they feel they can integrate into their community.</p>
<p>You might also ask to see if he is a bit depressed or overwhelmed by the experience. These too can be addressed.</p>
<p>I had similar concerns about my son who is naturally more reserved. The proctors/advisor picked up on it right away and have been making it a point to nudge DS out of his room. He played laser tag last weekend and loved it! He also went to club night and signed up for a couple things! Does your DS’s school have club info day? I was surprised at which clubs DS picked- I thought computer and math club since he sounds a lot like your DS but he picked clubs in all different areas: sports, science, history…</p>
<p>I don’t know if this would work for your DS but we also had a conversation with our son during which we explained that BS is a significant investment and we expect him to take advantage of the opportunities available to him- not just sit in his room. We only had to say it once in a calm manner but he got our drift!</p>
Wow… You are really helpful, and smart as a rock.</p>
<p>To the OP: I am a kid, but I remember when (in maybe 5-7 grade) I really didn’t do much. I can’t put myself in your son’s shoes, but how about you speak with his advisor and help your son find out what he likes, maybe he is overwhelmed with everything there is to do…</p>
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<p>Principal didn’t say anything wrong. Sarum’s comment was totally unrelated, unhelpful, and disrespectful to this parent that is concerned about her son’s well-being.</p>
<p>I don’t know, benevolent. Video game addiction is a real thing and the symptoms that the OP posted surely fall in line with it. If I were the OP, I wouldn’t have taken an offense at Sarum’s comment; nor would I have thought it unhelpful, especially if I had not yet considered the possibility.</p>
<p>One of the things I like about this board is the mix of adult and child perspectives. I try to keep in mind that while I might find something irrelevent, a teen might find it important. This is valuable to me and the reverse should be valuable to teens here. </p>
<p>The one thing that I think no one can argue with, however, is that a child calling an adult “smart as a rock” is not only rude, it reveals an almost complete inability to consider a differing perspective. I certainly don’t expect my son to understand my perspective all the time. But if he resorted to calling me stupid just because he was unwilling, or unable, to see my point; well, I would be extremely disappointed, to say the least.</p>
<p>Well said Neato. This is the Parents Forum. I have five sons and have seen the socially negative results of an overwhelming attraction/distraction to play video games. Luckily we nipped it in the bud at my house. The OP’s description of his kid to me sounds like a video gamer addiction. Enough said.</p>
<p>B4 - When the CC user Principal V, previously called PrincipalViola (banned by MODS) writes “Wow… You are really helpful, and smart as a rock.” He/she is violating the above mentioned TOS “Flames, insults, and personal attacks will not be tolerated.”
B4, this is the Parents Forum which you are welcome to participate in.</p>
<p>I have noted today as many others have, PV’s ongoing habit of insulting CC Members who disagree with him or he disagrees with.</p>
What I said was rude, yes, but not undeserved. The OP is not able to relay (and we are not able to understand) the complete situation through a textual, and bare at that, medium. For Sarum to so blatantly diagnose, using his amazing psychiatric ability, this kid as a computer gamer is sheer wrong.</p>
<p>A lot of parents who are on these boards show the answers to much wondered questions to their kids. Imagine seeing someone saying that in a completely carefree manner in front of not only the adult, but also the kid. </p>
<p>I understand your point, fine, I should see Sarum’s “point”. However the way by which he expressed is pure wrong. I don’t think any parent with a child going through such nostalgia wants to hear that. What the hell does he mean by “sounds like a computer gamer to me”. AKA, did that add anything to help the OP.</p>
<p>See you keep ragging that crap. I try to help the OP, while you antagonize everything. Just stop being a pia, ok… If you have anything mildly useful to say, feel free. If you don’t, feel just as free. Don’t expect me to give a damn what you think, please. </p>
<p>@op: Have you tried speaking with the advisor or your son? Any news?</p>
<p>I’m not posing… I genuinely am asking. I actually have a mini conv going with the op in PMs, so my question is genuine. Moreover, the op hasn’t been back for a few days, good news or bad news, regardless we (hope/think) we can help… so. </p>
<p>If I was a poser I would just say “oh op, hope your son is doing well”, trust me, I care. I remember not doing any activities and how much it hurt me, so…</p>
<p>Remember guys and girls this line is from a so called concerned ““Student”” to an adult parent:</p>
<p>PV says-
"See you keep ragging that crap. I try to help the OP, while you antagonize everything. Just stop being a pia, ok… If you have anything mildly useful to say, feel free. If you don’t, feel just as free. Don’t expect me to give a damn what you think, please. @op: Have you tried speaking with the advisor or your son? Any news? "
++I remember not doing any activities and how much it hurt me, so… ++</p>
<p>When I read your drivel I keep thinking of a middle aged soul locked up in a cell, with a laptop and a ton of time, trying to figure out how to cash in emotionally on Preppie kids and parents, not a young student as you claim.</p>
<p>2et you are right he is a poser, and drama queen to boot!</p>
<p>I agree Sarum, PV cannot be a student as he posts all day long. My daughter now at school has not seen CC since she started. Most everyone else has something -its called a “life!”</p>