Headfakes common by cc parents?

Parent Cafe
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<p>Impressed by the numerous accomplishments of one cc parent’s child, I looked over the lists of award winners, curious to see how many other kids had managed to snag all three awards. To my surprise, NO student had. Which means the cc poster has been less than truthful in his/her postings.</p>

<p>I have been intentionally vague about some things to maintain my (and my kid’s) privacy, but I have never deliberately posted lies. Is it common for cc members to post “red herrings” or lies to conceal their identify, or is this an aberration?</p>

<p>To be honest, this has made me question the veracity of everything this person has posted, as well as the truthfulness of other posters. Am I over-reacting?</p>

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<p>I would say that <em>most</em> CC’ers are honest. Yes, some definitely are story-tellers, though. Don’t let that keep you from the forum … there is so much good info here.</p>

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<p>I never believe a GPA on CC, unless it’s UNweighted. There are umpteen threads on how to “weight” a GPA, and all are different, and all are used in some location or another. Some use a full point for honors, some use a half-point, etc. Some top out at 4.5, some at 5.0, some at 6.0… really, it’s useless to try to compare them and the colleges are going to calculate it their own way anyway. (Our high school uses a bizarre system where an A in a college prep class is 12.0, A in honors is 15, A in AP is 16.5. Someday I’m going to casually mention my son’s 13.2 GPA on CC and see who freaks out about it.)</p>

<p>I also find it amusing when people list every single little thing they/their child has done in the last 3 years, in detail. Really, just say you/your kid averages 2 hours per week doing community service at the Youth Center, don’t list every individual event there that you/he ever helped out with during that 2 hours! You don’t sound industrious; just pretentious.</p>

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<p>It’s discouraging to learn that the “reality checks” I seek here may not be so real after all! </p>

<p>But ha, the same thing happens in face-to-face conversations with other parents…</p>

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<p>^^^^ “the same thing happens in face-to-face conversations with other parents…”</p>

<p>My mom was impressed by a newspaper article that said a dance studio near her went to a competition and earned a bunch of gold medals – until I told her that we’ve done that same competition, and gold is one of the LOWER levels of medals they give out. The top award is actually called a Double Platinum, followed by Platinum, then Gold… talk about grade inflation! But little Susie can call her grandma and say that her tap dance got a gold medal, and grandma thinks she won. I’m not sure if it’s funny or sad.</p>

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<p>My mother in law recently told me about the grandchild of an acquaintance who is <em>so smart</em> and <em>so accomplished</em> that she not only got into an ivy … she got a full ride scholarship. I explained that what the grandparent actually did was brag about the fact that her kid couldn’t pay full freight … since there are no academic scholaships to ivies … only need based grants. </p>

<p>Just take the bragging with a grain of salt … look for the good advice & don’t worry about the rest of it. There is NO such thing as a “chances” thread, by the way!</p>

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<p>Haha, I think one student CC’er complained about how her mother would brag about her 0 EFC ride to Amherst. Can’t remember which thread, but I remember the line “it’s because we’re poor, Mom” pretty well!</p>

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<p>I actually think that some of these posts are pretty mean-spirited.</p>

<p>First of all, the grandparent in question comes from a different era, in which a scholarship could mean merit + need, or just merit. I doubt she was trying to deceive anyone, or was knowingly bragging about the grandchild’s low income status. Also, at some institutions even today, the term “scholarship” can loosely refer to grant aid as a special category of scholarship.</p>

<p>Secondly, the reason that someone of restricted means should be proud (and their relatives proud) is that an acceptance in itself – grant-aided or merit-aided or non-aided – is a considerable accomplishment for a family without connections, legacies, in-family role-models, and certain advantages of the upper middle class. This is one reason (not the only reason) the private Elites have extended their admissions perspective peripherally across all economic classes, paying deliberate attention to those of limited means.</p>

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<p>Epiphany, if this was an underprivileged person, I would never be so flip. The family is not poor at all. Ivies have pretty good aid for solidly middle class families. And I only used this situation to point out that we don’t all look at things the same way. A scholarship to one, a grant to another, a handout to someone else, a lifeline to yet another. A 4.0 to one is top notch, yet it is pretty low at another high school. 12 AP’s is the norm at one school, while at another only 3 are offered (and perhaps only 1 fits in a kid’s schedule). As I said before, take what you can from these threads & don’t worry about the rest.</p>

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<p>“Ivies have pretty good aid for solidly middle class families.”</p>

<p>I know that. I have discussed this often on CC myself. I’m referring to the “zero EFC” family that I (perhaps incorrectly?) thought was being discussed as an Amherst admit that a grandmother was supposedly bragging about as having received “a full scholarship.” Perhaps I am mixing up posts or facts. Somehow this thread seems to have begun in reference to some commonly known CC postings that I guess I’m not aware of.</p>

<p>Your post confuses me further. I don’t know what all these references to various gpa’s and AP’s have to do with the OP, which I thought was referring to overstated achievement (not whether 12 reported AP’s were being compared to 3 reported AP’s).</p>

<p>What do you mean “take what you can from these threads & don’t worry about the rest”? That seems to say that I shouldn’t care about the details or the accuracy, but just move right along. Huh? <em>scratches head</em></p>

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<p>I have been reading numerous posts. It is amazing how many kids have won numerous awards, have lots of leadership positions, get straight As. top 5% of their class, and just have so many options they just can’t decide.</p>

<p>As well, there are so many posters who get straight 5 on all their AP tests, get perfect SAT scores, are presidents of 3-4 clubs</p>

<p>I think there is lots of exageration on CC, that many may mean 3, that leadership mean they are one of 4 presidents of some clubs</p>

<p>I take stats on CC with a grain of salt</p>

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<p>“First of all, the grandparent in question comes from a different era, in which a scholarship could mean merit + need, or just merit. I doubt she was trying to deceive anyone, or was knowingly bragging about the grandchild’s low income status. Also, at some institutions even today, the term “scholarship” can loosely refer to grant aid as a special category of scholarship.”</p>

<p>Very true. This is fairly common, in fact.</p>

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<p>It is my opinion that more than 50% of the posts on this site are from parents who are living their lives vicariously through their children.</p>

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<p>I never thought to question the veracity, but I just skip over all the ECs that people post. It’s too late for us to do all those ECs, so I dismiss them as unimportant for my purposes. I just notice what I can learn from. </p>

<p>Luckily, I’m not seeking Ivy League admission for my d. State schools are just fine, at this point. When I first started reading on CC, I came away shocked and dismayed at how ‘behind’ we were in terms of ECs, especially. I’ve gotten over it, learned late that Ivy Leagues are for either the wealthy or indigent, and not to bother with them. I am happily focused on state schools, and think I have cobbled together a good list of colleges for my d to review and then start her own investigation.</p>

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<p>epiphany: my family is of very limited means. I think it’s more of a parent thing, than anything else. The amusing things that parents tend to do. ;)</p>

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<p>“I think it’s more of a parent thing, than anything else.”</p>

<p><em>What’s</em> “a parent thing” ? Again, I’m confused. </p>

<p>Are you saying it’s a parent thing to lie? It’s a parent thing to be clueless about what is and is not “a scholarship”? A parent thing not to know the difference between 3 AP’s and 12 AP’s? (That would be 9 AP’s.)</p>

<p>For the record, I’ve never misrepresented on or off cc what my children have done, academically & otherwise. In fact, even on CC, the only suspect postings which are not clearly ■■■■■■ (I can think of 3 or 4 of those, & as I remember they were all thread-openers, & most likely students posing as parents), have been those by parents who claimed that their children were equally accomplished in 2 mega-areas of e.c.'s where the time requirements were clearly in conflict & thus impossible.</p>

<p>Otherwise, it is actually verifiable that there’s an enormous pool of amazingly talented & accomplished college-bound students. If it seems unbelievable, consider that there is also an enormous pool of undereducated & unaccomplished students that get little press. They’re dropouts, whether or not they’re working, or they’re committing crime, or they’re already in prison. Or they’re going nowhere. There’s a separate tier, which is doing just fine. They may not be mega-accomplished, but they’re educated well enough to attend state colleges throughout the country & many privates as well. Or, by choice they’re going the community college route to save 2 years of tuition, even though they might be able to afford all 4. </p>

<p>We’re still in the echo boom, so the college-age population is still fairly gigantic. It’s just that the cc microscopic is focused on the high end pool, which in comparison looks to be skewed, & thus somehow unbelievably distorted.</p>

<p>Ask admissions officers & reps: they’ll tell you how tough their jobs are because of the level of achievement they have to sift through. Look at the “Admitted Freshman Profile” of many of the selective publics & privates that post those summaries on their websites. I remember UCLA’s of a few years ago (even!), & it knocked my socks off.</p>

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<p>I was referring to the “OMG MY S/D GOT A FULL SCHOLARSHIP!!” kind of thing. (When the financial aid award is need-based.) While the parent has a right to be proud (mostly on the virtue of admissions), it makes me laugh. And it also slightly reminds me of my own parent.</p>

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<p>Clearly I don’t get the point of this thread, particularly the “humor” part. Call me dull. </p>

<p>Just for the record (again), probably more than one public U. offers a MERIT scholarship. For example, the University of California offers a Regents based strictly on merit. It is for a small & highly select group of students with an exceptional intellectual bent. Now, the financing of the award is additionally tied to need, so one can get a “full scholarship” based on financial need, but even non-needy Regents scholars receive an honorarium.</p>

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<p>I’m pretty sure some of the athletic recruitment stories are exaggerated; I had contact with an Ivy coach at the same time I read one of the threads here referring to that exact sport at that exact Ivy and it so didn’t add up.</p>

<p>Skepticism is very healthy on these forums; I’ve seen kids post what are probably real stats with B plus averages and 1800-2000 SATs and get advised that their only hope is to go to a community college and try to get their numbers up.</p>

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<p>I get the OP’s point completely, as I have had the same experience – discovering that a parent poster (no one on this thread!!) fabricated at least some of his/her S/D’s accomplishments, which were catalogued very specifically on CC. There is wonderful information to be found on CC, and there are so many generous and knowledgeable posters here. But yes, on a public board, a measure of skepticism is a wise idea.</p>