<p>It’s always wise to take with a grain of salt anything you read on a message board. Also realize that students can masquerade as parents. The reverse also is true.</p>
<p>For those of you too young to have been aware, or not Internet-involved at the time, you may want to read up on the saga of [Kaycee</a> Nicole](<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaycee_Nicole][U]Kaycee”>Kaycee Nicole - Wikipedia) and [url=<a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Munchausen_by_Internet]“[U]Munchausen-by-Internet[/U]”[/url">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Munchausen_by_Internet]"Munchausen-by-Internet”[/url</a>]. Although many, probably most, CC posters are legit, as NSM says it’s always a good idea to take message board claims with some scepticism. Even if mostly honest, many legit posters will mask or alter some of their specifics to keep some measure of their privacy intact.</p>
<p>I know the OP was talking about awards, but I took the topic to be “in general, do people lie/exaggerate on CC?” Or put another way, “Are these people for real, and is my kid hopelessly behind - or should I take what I read with a grain of salt?” </p>
<p>When I first came on these boards I was shocked at the number of kids with 4-point-something GPA. Our hs hadn’t given the kids their class ranks, and after reading these boards I thought my son was probably a lot lower in rank than I had been guessing. I started aiming my suggestions for his college search a lot lower. When I actually got his class rank, he was HIGHER than I had assumed. That’s when I realized that Muffy’s 4-point-zillion at her hs would have been calculated as a 3-point-something by OUR hs’s guidance counselors. </p>
<p>So do people lie? Not necessarily, but sometimes yes. Should I compare my kid to theirs and panic? NO.</p>
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<p>You may very well be right, but playing the devil’s advocate here for a bit, I would also keep in mind that the limitation of a forum like this one is that you just don’t always know what the real deal is. People can, as a result, sometimes find themselves charged, tried and convicted without ever knowing that they were on trial. There may be no intentional miscommunication involved - there might be awards with similar descriptions, or the poster may be trying to provide a “separate but equal” listing of awards as a way of maintaining some privacy. There could be a conflict between wanting to provide enough info to give an accurate portrayal of the student involved versus not giving away so much information that it’s quite easy to ID the student in question. Or maybe they just got it wrong unintentionally, as in " NO mom, I only won two of those awards not the third!" As for parents posting as kids or vice versa - I’m sure that parents and kids sometimes share a screenname for awhile without realizing it’s a faux pas. Or sometimes kids will post on the parents forum under another name just wanting to get the answer to a real dilemma. Anyway, if there’s no blatantly ■■■■■ like behavior (and even sometimes when it seems like there is) I generally prefer to err on the side of caution. </p>
<p>On the other hand, I don’t doubt that intentional outright exaggerations and lies do go on.</p>
<p>I absolutely agree with post 24. I also don’t see how/where posters here can claim that they “know” something posted wasn’t true unless the award or awards listed (for example) were given out to __ # of people, & they personally know the universe of actual recipients of that award already. That would make any additional “award” a fabrication.</p>
<p>Perhaps somewhere here can give me an example of e.c. statements that could be verified or discredited. (Other than the general one I mentioned of it being mathematically impossible to engage simultaneously in a certain # of hours on 2 conflicting, hugely involving e.c.'s; you could do it serially, not simultaneously. That’s the one that’s the red flag for me.)</p>
<p>I also agree with roshke that there are often innocent mistakes by parents. When D#1 & I were reviewing her e.c. resume, she had to correct me on the 2nd pass of it. I had mistakenly told someone (not on CC!) a wrong category of award she had won, because originally I misheard her or misunderstood the frequency of it or some other aspect of it. We therefore got our heads together very closely for the final draft of that resume, so it would be accurate. We also listed contact names for the colleges, so that they could verify those accomplishments.</p>
<p>OTOH, D#2 initially under-reported her achievements, forgot her rank/level, etc., so I had to help her rewrite it to be more accurate without any exaggeration.</p>
<p>Roshke, I don’t know if you were referring to my earlier post here when you were talking about parent-student mutual postings. if so, that’s not what I was referring to. I was referring to fictitious identities that were later removed or seriously called into question for their veracity. In at least 2 cases they were out and out ■■■■■■.</p>
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<p>Bingo, epiphany. For certain national awards and scholarships, awarding entities publish lists of awardees with the names of their high schools, hometowns, and/or college destinations, and sometimes even with brief substantive bios.</p>
<p>Yes, I’m aware of that, wjb. I guess I thought that the implications on this thread went beyond that – to claim to know <em>unpublished</em> info, as well.</p>
<p>Also, unless posters here know the real names of cc screen identities, how would they know whether or not a stated award was among those published awards? Especially unless other identifying info is associated with the screen name, such as location, and/or the student being referred to is similarly identified by location.</p>
<p>However, to support the general idea being asserted here, I do remember that it was actually a couple of cc student posters who pulled back the mask on one of the ■■■■■ threads I referred to, exactly by stating that the so-called awards mentioned by the so-called “parent” were improbable, given the # that were usually given out or had already been given out, or something. I wouldn’t call that definitive proof, but it certain cast doubt on the validity of the “parent” assertions, which i.m.o. were introduced for AA-■■■■■■■■ reasons.</p>
<p>It’s easy enough to check in many cases. For example, every time a list of scholarship winners is released, a parent posts that his/her kid is one of the winners listed. But a scan of the three lists of winners shows that there is not a single person who is named on all three. The kind of lists I’m talking about are U.S. Presidential Scholars, Lowe’s scholarship, Siemen’s scholarship, Atlas Shrugged Essay contest, etc. – lists of winners that are available on the sponsor’s website.</p>
<p>In my eyes, if there is no student who is listed as a winner of each of the awards/scholarships claimed by the parent – a student all the lists have in common, that’s evidence someone is posting deliberately misleading information. My question is whether it is being done to yank other cc members’ chains, or to disguise the poster’s identity.</p>
<p>As I noted, in the past I have been intentionally vague about some things to protect my (and my kid’s privacy), so I’m wondering if other people post “red herrings” to keep their identity under wraps.</p>
<p>While I can’t speak for other CC parents, I can tell you that I do not recall posting any “red herrings” about my family. I simply chose not to post a few details to keep our identity somewhat private (my yD used to be a regular CCer and pretty easily idetifiable to her firends - BTW, her posted stats do not contain any fake info). My gut feeling is that many regular posters on these boards do not post lies either.</p>
<p>thanks, everyone, for these helpful facts, reminders, cautionary tales. I’ll remember to read with a sense of balance here. As I said to someone else, though, why does one need to fictitiously pile on recitation of awards, when the Big Prize would seem to be the acceptance itself? Once that’s in, what’s the point, unless someone challenges the reason(s) for acceptance?</p>
<p>And I definitely agree with post #19.</p>
<p>If one reads CC & compares himself/her child to the teens whose stats are posted, unnecessary stress can result. Not only might those stats be exaggerated … but even if they are not, not every kid needs to have those stats to be accepted (even to the very same school the 12 AP/12 5’s, 4.6 gpa, Westinghouse winner was accepted). OTOH, one might read the posts & become overly certain she/his child is a shoe-in for a school or scholarship based on posted stats. </p>
<p>Like I said, there’s lots of great info & advice. You just have to use it wisely.</p>
<p>I think in many cases it’s just that messages get lost in translation. People don’t understand that Ivies don’t give merit money. Grandma A talks to Grandma B. Grandma A says my grandS got into Harvard. Grandma B says my grandS did too–and HE got a scholarship! Grandma B thinks this means her grandS was a better candidate than Grandma A’s grandS. Sometimes, Grandma A doesn’t know the “scoop” either and thinks it does mean that. If she does know the truth, she may be well mannered enough not to spoil things for Grandma B. </p>
<p>Or a kid will be recruited by an Ivy for sports. The 'rents say it depends on financial aid. Everyone in the community waits to hear if the kid gets enough money. When the financial aid comes through and it’s good, so John or Jane accepts the offer, the town newspaper prints that John or Jane got “an athletic scholarship to X Ivy,” even though that’s not the case. The 'rents aren’t about to call the paper and demand a correction because they’d just as soon not have the entire town know the family received need based aid.</p>
<p>Oh, and there are some cases in which a kid DOES win two top awards and has to accept one. You can win a Marshall and a Rhodes in the same year, for example, but you can only choose one. Or you might win a major fellowship for grad school and then decide to go to law school instead and have to decline it. Usually, an alternate will then get the scholarship and the original winner’s name won’t be mentioned.</p>
<p>Your post is also helpful, jonri, building as it does upon other comments. However, I now understand what some of the other posters were referring to obliquely, having been filled in. It seems that for the most part they were talking about deliberate deceptions in specific award areas.</p>
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<p>No, really? That many? ;-)</p>
<p>vicariousparent, I have a suspicion that 50% of the posts here are from parents seeking advice on kitchen remodel and reliability of clothes dryers 
College stuff is just an excuse to join this forum.</p>
<p>I am here for the political discourse. </p>
<p>The parent thing is just incidental. :rolleyes:</p>
<p>Whenever I read one of those superstar “chance me” threads from the kids who are 4.8…2400…500 service hours…research assistant…5 APs every year…9 varsity letters…and star of the school play I don’t care whether it’s true or not. I merely feel a tug of pity in my heart. </p>
<p>I wonder if the kid has any friends. Real, true friends and time to be with them. I read about these kids and consider them the miniature versions of “married to my work.” I picture them like Jacob Marley, Scrooge’s business partner in “A Christmas Carol,” all covered in chains and the burdens of their aspirations. I actually find myself glad I don’t know any of them. </p>
<p>It’s a shame, really. They’re only children, after all.</p>
<p>So, whether a post is myth or truth doesn’t matter to me. I just sigh and hope the kid has a friend. One, true bff.</p>
<p>I’m here for the cat health stories. Whatever happened to the cat with the droopy tail?? Inquiring minds want to know!</p>
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<p>My kids are far from superstars but I do know of some. I think there are people in this world who are born with a lot of gifts - superior intelligence, leadership and people skills and super nice character. They do have very good friends.</p>