<p>So, my brilliant S and his 3 brilliant friends have tickets to a concert in Poughkeepsie tonight. We live in NJ. These 4 stooges apparently had no plan of how to get there and back. Now there is a mad scramble, as all parents are banning their kids from driving to this concert. Don’t know if it’s related to the concert (Third Eye Blind) or to the distance (100 miles), but we were going to let our S drive all of them, but now my H says that we would be fools.
So, options.
I looked up Amtrak. Besides being $55 roundtrip, there is no return for tonight.
Any other ideas, by bus, train, via NYC?
I know most motels would not let 4 boys stay without an adult. (They are all 18)
Should we let the tickets go?</p>
<p>If I felt S’s driving experience was adequate and I trusted all the friends, I would probably let them drive. Make sure they have a full tank of gas, very good directions, know where to park and call when they arrive and when they leave.</p>
<p>My #2 and his friends were big concert-goers and before we felt comfortable with them driving, the parents would take turns bringing the kids to the concerts. We would fill the time with dinner, shopping, movies and reading. Oftentimes we would see lots of other parents waiting in their cars for the kids to get out.</p>
<p>Actually, Metro North goes to Poughkeepsie…it’s about 1 hour 20 minutes from Grand Central. Problem is last train leaves at about 11 for the return with a change at Croton-Harmon and gets into GCT at 1:05am or so. My experience is that 18 yo kids CAN rent hotel/motel rooms. Maybe check and see what’s nearby the concert venue and have them take the train back to GCT the next morning…</p>
<p>I feel as if my S is quite capable of doing the drive, but now that the other parents have instituted this ban, we are wondering why. Are these concerts totally wild? I know that there is alcohol and pot inside the halls. But do kids come out rowdy and throwing stuff etc. Is it risky to even be parked there?</p>
<p>I did look into Metro-North, but no trains between 10:59 p.m. and 4:00 a.m.</p>
<p>While some hotels say you have to be 21 to rent a room, there are plenty that do allow teens to rent rooms. S, 19, recently rented a room with a friend when they visited a college. We were able to reserve and pay in advance through Expedia.</p>
<p>Hi Chocoholic,</p>
<p>I live fairly close to Poughkeepsie. I’m guessing that this concert is at The Chance. My kids have attended several shows there over the last 2 or 3 years and haven’t had any problems. I’m not sure about the parking situation.</p>
<p>100 miles? They’re all 18? Do you basically trust them? I say let 'em drive. The concert will end at 11:00 and they’ll be home by 1:00 am. Cripey, when we were 17 my best friend and I drove to and from the Watkins Glen concert in a day, about 160 miles each way (the last 5 or so on foot). We had to ask to use the car, but it never occurred to anyone that we shouldn’t do it if no one needed the car that day.</p>
<p>With gas, tolls, and mileage, it will cost about $10@, which is much cheaper than the train/motel option.</p>
<p>Make certain that they understand – no substances, no risk-taking, no speeding, and if the driver is tired pull over and let someone else drive.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t worry about the wildness of a Third Eye Blind concert, especially if it’s not in a bar. Worry about the kids, not the venue.</p>
<p>I’m not sure what you can really do if it’s the other parents that are against any of the kids driving. What are the other parents solution? If they do take a train up, how would they get to a hotel from the concert? That sounds like the only solution that they would agree to.</p>
<p>Wait until those kids are in college and the parents find out after the fact (like I did) that kids will routinely drive hours away for a concert.</p>
<p>well, what’s surprising, is that these parents won’t let their kids drive, but the boys are allowed to be passengers in S’s car. See, I would rather have my S be the driver than the passenger.</p>
<p>^ Maybe they know they’re bad or inexperienced drivers.</p>
<p>These are 18 year old men who have parents restricting them from driving 100 miles to a concert? What’s wrong with this picture? Are they trustworthy?</p>
<p>Look up some local hotels and call them and ask their policy. There are ones which will rent to an 18 year old, although some of those require that the 18 year old book the room to his or her credit card, so you should check on whether one of the students will have to have credit card with his/her name on it.</p>
<p>I know a lot of 18 year olds – especially from big city areas – that don’t have much driving experience. I suspect the trip from NJ to Poughkeepsie is not trivial in terms of traffic, etc. So, yeah, I wouldn’t be surprised at all that there are lots of parents who might worry about that activity.</p>
<p>Okay, so after much debate, they are driving. It’s either my S or a boy who is pretty cautious. S has quite a bit of driving experience on some hairy highways. He did half the drive to Indiana and back in November, half the drive to South Carolina and back, in February. </p>
<p>He made a deal that the other 3 have to pay for gas and tolls, and stay awake on the drive home.</p>
<p>Of all 8 parents, my H and I are the only ones really willing to let our S drive. I think people in our area are more concerned about lawsuits than anything else. I would rather be 18 and driving to a concert than 49 and worrying in my house.</p>
<p>I think your decision is correct. Kids will respond to how they’re treated. Read your son the riot act and tell him to have a good time. Also have him call you once they’ve left the concert and are on their way home; that way you can read him the riot act again and tell him to drive carefully. Suggest that they stop for a snack on the way home to break up the drive if it’s a long one.</p>
<p>My son has always been the designated driver for his friends, but I’ve also made it perfectly clear that I would be more than willing to retrieve him and his buddies from anywhere and at any time and that there would be no repercussions. Along with that went the caveat that if he ever entered a car where the driver had so much as a single drink he would be grounded for the remainder of this life.</p>
<p>Okay, they finally left at 3:31. The drama was too much. </p>
<p>One boy’s parents are away for the weekend, and they took his keys with them, so he had no way to get to our house!!! Way to trust your kid! If I had told my S “No” and went to Timbuctoo, he would not go. So he had to wait for a ride from Boy 2, whose parents were mad that he was going.</p>
<p>Anyhow, they are off, they will have a wonderful time. My S appreciates our trust in him. Funny thing is, they are doing the post-prom beach house next month, 12 boys and girls, for a weekend, and I was the only one who had objections to that!!! :eek:</p>
<p>I would let them drive; they do not need to go thorugh NYC–check the map and see if it works better for them to go across Bear Mountin Bridge or the next one up (Newburgh?). It is highway driving, not city driving. Or volunteer to be the driver! You can always go to a movie while they are at the concert.</p>
<p>Cross-posted–glad they went though.</p>
<p>oh, they took 287 N to 87 N, so no city driving, mattmom.</p>
<p>I did volunteer to be the driver, and they are quite cozy around me, like spilling their guts and all, but since the weather is fine, I did think they should go alone.</p>
<p>ummm… it’s raining now. Choc, I’m sure they will be fine.</p>
<p>My son is 18, a great trustworthy responsible kid, and I would not let him drive by himself (or with 3 friends) to P…P … P… P oughkepsie, so there is nothing at all wrong with that picture either. btw, does your son have his regular license or is he still restricted to 1 non-relative passenger and no driving after 11pm?</p>
<p>Sorry for asking this question now.</p>