Our younger daughter has been with her BF for a number of years. We have a stocking for him and give him a couple of gifts at Christmas. Usually something nice, but not over the top.
Our SIL gets a few things and a stocking, and there may be a joint gift.
If we give money for Christmas, the total is split in 2 and #1D and SIL get half and #2D gets the other half, BF gets none of it.
It works for us.
Before DIL & S married, we gave her less. Now we try to give them a couples gift, but they are SO hard to shop for. They have all they need and a lot of what they want. Oh well, we will keep trying. D bought her a nice umbrella from us because S has one and she doesn’t (D noticed when she visited them in NYC). I told them the great seats I bought them at the MET was my gift to them, but we will buy them more. Haha!
Anybody at our house for Christmas gets presents, something I picked up from my Mom. We always had a few additional people around and Mom had a stash of gifts (we called it The Present Drawer). Water bottles, gloves, fancy pencils, etc never clothes or food.
SO’s of more than a year got a small gift our kids conveyed (the SO’s not being here for Xmas) Ring-and-a-date engagements got presents like usual. Both of the eventual ILs were shocked when my Mom included them in her extremely generous cash gifts once engaged. We consider our DiLs our children – I say I have 4 kids “2 we raised and 2 we married into”.
I love giving presents. I have to remind myself to tone it down sometimes; thank goodness we aren’t wealthy or I’d be gifting everyone, lol. This year I am particularly happy w a gift I made for my mom – it’s a set of month-by-month address labels so she can keep sending birthday cards to everyone. I filled them all out by hand and put them in a clear envelope. DH says she and the dementia will find a way to defeat me, but I want her to have a chance to try.
Oh Yes, for the anybody at your house get gifts! One year my SIL’s mother (from Hawaii) and his sister’s family (CA) came east with DD’s family to experience Christmas with our extended family. I bought an oversized stocking and had some gifts for all 5 of them in there.
I also have a present drawer (ok, it’s really a shelf in the closet in the guest room) that is for random gift needs. We haven’t had any extra people show up at Christmas, but it’s been useful for unexpected invitations to parties where I should bring a hostess gift, the random office gift exchange that I wasn’t planning for, and stuff like that.
When the kids were serious with their bfs/gfs and they were spending Christmas with us I got them a stocking and a gift. Now they are all 3 married and we have 5 grandchildren. I stopped doing stockings a couple years ago because they thought it would confuse the grandkids (and it was actually a relief). A few years ago we switched from giving everyone presents to the adults drawing names in a gift exchange (the grandkids still get presents). I also still give each couple money. My dog gifts everyone Christmas pajamas and an ornament. I switched from giving them out Christmas Eve to Thanksgiving so they can wear them all season.
We give a family gift to DD and SIL, and we ask for suggestions for smaller gifts. We don’t get them a lot of smaller gifts because their family gift is usually something bigger that they want. This year, they have both asked for various kinds of socks. DD wants Pilates socks and DS wants new wool socks. Easy peasy.
Both asked for shoes but we told them they need to order those and have them sent to their house…in case there is something wrong. We got each of them a small wallet and will put the money for the shoes in that along with a few gift cards to places they go to. We will wrap the wallets up in a nice package separate one for each of them. And that’s it.
I got an idea for a son-in-law gift yesterday (I have 2 Sons in law and no DIL). It is a bathrobe with his college mascot embroidered on it. I liked it but it says it is ‘silk feel’ and I didn’t like that. I’d prefer a terrycloth one so I may keep looking. On the site (Fanatics) they also had nice vests, hoodies, etc with the logo on them). He’s thin but very tall (6’5"), so hard to know exactly what will fit him but I think the 1 size fits all bathrobe would work, or an oversized hoodie.
Unfortunately, other SIL (and daughter) went to a school that Fanatics doesn’t carry merch for. So far for him I have a set of EVOO in flavors (garlic, lemon) from Costco as he loves to cook.
Most of the gifts to both kids are for their homes so they are sort of shared gifts, and I just give them to either D or SIL, expecting them to share. Last year each SIL a got cast iron frying pan that he can use for camping.
Both of my children went to smaller schools that are not on fanatics
Both of them I can order directly from the college bookstore. I have ordered things for my husband from both kids schools.
Unless you know he wears a bathrobe (my son doesn’t) then I would be wary of a bathrobe. I have no idea if my son in law does. He’s a big fan of his school so he has tons of stuff, even the dog has a collar from his school and not my daughter’s. It was a gift from his parents.
I normally wouldn’t buy a bathroom but they registered for them for their wedding and didn’t get them. But maybe that was daughter’s wish and not his? Maybe the sweatshirt would be better? My older brother also is gaga over the Murdock’s store that sells Carhart, and all my brothers and both SIL love Carhart. Brother got some new gloves there last week.
Other kids (not Fanatic school) have a TON of stuff from their school because they were both athletes. At one point I said I didn’t think I’d seen SIL in any clothing that wasn’t from the school, Costco, or my brother’s lacrosse program (he helps coach so gets several tshirts and sweatshirts a year). He lives in casual clothing. My daughter is a snob and prefers Lululemon for work out clothes.
Yeah, I don’t know many folks that wear bathrobes. That said, I did buy D a fluffy soft terry one when she was recovering from wisdom tooth extraction and she was very grateful. You have to really know the recipient to know whether it will be well-received or not.
I wear a bathrobe. I have one though and I’m picky.
GD1 (4 yr old) wears a bath robe.
I got SIL1 a backpack for work - just big enough for a laptop, phone, wallet.
SIL2 - cashmere socks and some fancy soap (Aesop).
My 3 yr old GD asked for a robe. I got a matching one for her doll. Leveret makes matching outfits.
I have purchased 2 bathrobes for my DIL They are her favorite items of clothing. They are from Barefoot Dreams, and she wears them often. I got the 2nd one as a “just because” present because it was on sale and I was pretty sure 1st one was wearing out. I got my husband a bathrobe this year for Christmas, because he asked for one, but I paid less than 30 bucks for it. If he decides he likes wearing a robe I will buy him a nicer one.
I have a barefoot dreams robe, I gifted it to myself last year for Christmas
Curious about how other families handle gifts between siblings. Do your adult children give gifts to each other? I usually get lists from S and D (and from D for SIL), and I make suggestions as to what they could buy for each other, but the more I think about it, I don’t remember buying for my siblings! We had a large blended family and I remember at some point drawing names among the adults but everyone bought for the kids. S is saying he just wants money (he just started a new job so he’s kind of broke) and I’ve got no ideas from D yet, so I’m thinking of suggesting he reach out to his sister to ask if she’d be okay with not exchanging, at least not this year. Also, since he’s single and D is married with a toddler, he gets one gift but has to buy three! I will encourage him to get something for his nephew, though.
It has changed over the years for our kids. Some years my 2 sons have purchased “big” (Kitchen Aid Blender, for example) for each other. My son and step-d, who are usually at our place for Christmas these days, usually do gifts to each other, but they’ve varied in cost, and they’re not always on the same page. I don’t get involved with what they do for each other unless asked. This year we did tell the one who was unemployed for 4 months that she shouldn’t spend much on Christmas presents, and told the other one that’s the advice we gave.
First time on this thread as I hate shopping, for myself and others. So, when I get a great idea I am so happy. Well, see my Say It Here rant. Now I am second-guessing so I am on here to ask whether anyone knows anything about the Skylight Calendar. DIL mentioned wanting this so that’s what we are getting her, but ds1 has rained on my parade. She loves to cook so the recipe function I think really appeals to her. Thoughts?
I think whatever works for your family or even the particular year is what is good!
My 3 still buy for each other and even for their SO’s. Sometimes they give a couple gift. Nothing too extravagant. Last year one daughter thrifted all her gifts for the family - it was GREAT!
They are adults - it’s up to them if they want to change their gift buying habits.