<p>Start making a life for yourself - and then think about whether he fits in with it. It will give you a better handle on the question am I better off with him or without him.</p>
<p>I would look at getting a job. Working give you your own money which gives you options. Start your own bank account. It also lets you meet people who are your own friends or colleagues, not both of you. (also these people can give recommendations of lawyers or financial planners)</p>
<p>Get a life. Take a night school course. Go on meetups.com and find a group and start planning your own activities. </p>
<p>Keep up with your own therapy and ask for specific strategies to deal with your husband’s comments. Practice what you want to say. At some point make the decision, not to back down and follow through.</p>
<p>In the fall when the kids are out of the house, plan a vacation on your own or with a girlfriend. </p>