<p>Curious about this. Everyone told us these relationships generally end by mid-way through freshman year. Not so with our son and his hs girlfriend, who, while 3,000 miles away, are more serious than ever.</p>
<p>Other experiences?</p>
<p>S and GF still going strong; she had dinner here tonight. She got a scholarship to his college for next year and will probably attend there with him. I hate to say it but they are a perfect match. She’s the first girl he ever dated, too.</p>
<p>My oldest D married her HS sweetheart and they attended separate colleges. They’ve been married 10 years and have 2 kids - wow, how time flies!!!</p>
<p>My daughter is a senior in high school and her bf is at college on the opposite coast… and they are going very, very strong. D. flew out east TWICE already - ostensibly to visit colleges on her own, but spending time with the bf is a big priority. </p>
<p>I don’t know… these two are hopelessly intertwined - when he’s at school there are 3-hour late night phone conversations every night. I can see them very slowly growing apart, but I don’t think there is going to be any sudden breakup soon. </p>
<p>I really like the bf but both these kids have some growing up they need to do before they are ready for a lifelong commitment.</p>
<p>D and BF are still going strong, 1 year plus.</p>
<p>She had planned to break-up before leaving for university then decided not to and has managed to see him twice over the fall. This break is a month long and we will see how things end up after spending mroe time together.</p>
<p>They are both really bummed out to be so far apart, but I am not sure either one could reasonably transfer, what with scholarships & sports, etc. It will be interesting to see how it all plays out. There has been a lot of discussion over the past 4 months.</p>
<p>Dizzy, how painful is the seperation for your S & his GF?</p>
<p>My D is a junior in high school and has been going out with a senior for about a year now. She claims they are going to break up when he goes to college next fall. We shall see.</p>
<p>I thought mind would have broken up by now. She is a freshman and he is a few years older and attends the local community college. They are going on 2 years together now. She had said they were going to break up before she left but it didn’t happen. She just ended her 6 week winter break and they are still together. I don’t see it lasting but I have already been proven wrong once before.
He is a great guy and will make someone a great husband one day. She wants to see the world and he is content to live his life in the same town he was raised. He is multi-generations in our town. But who knows.
With cell phones they can talk multiple times a day at no cost.</p>
<p>I know people who started dating in 7th grade (!!), got married after college (2 different colleges), and recently celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary.</p>
<p>Count my son in! ~b.</p>
<p>Somemom,</p>
<p>I don’t know how painful it is for the young couple. I know they talk on the phone more hours than most people work per week. It is extremely painful for my husband, who married his high school gf (not me) and views it as the single most disastrous choice of his entire life. For him, it is akin to watching our son drowning and being unable to save him.</p>
<p>My earlier assurances to him that they would go off to school and find new interests didn’t pan out, so I’m in the hot seat now. My new line is “like father, like son”. It’s not going over so well…</p>
<p>Dizzy, have you talked to your son about his long range plans? Just because his dad made the mistake of marrying too early doesn’t mean the son will do the same. </p>
<p>I know that my daughter has made some comments about her boyfriend, weddings, & having kids that scare me – but when I talk to her it is clear that they both want to finish their educations, and my daughter is open to the possibility that things will change over time. </p>
<p>I do think that the unlimited night & weekend calling that cell phones allow really changes the dynamic for long distance relationships – or at least it makes them cheaper to maintain.</p>
<p>I’ve been dating my boyfriend since i was in 11th grade, and I graduated college last may… so these things definately can last ;)</p>
<p>Well…my daughter has dated her bf since 8th grade! Everyone told us they would break up going to different colleges (in different states), but that couldn’t be further from the truth! They handled the distance extremely well (they’re both sophomores) and she just arrived home from a study abroad semester in Rome. Apparently, absence does make the heart grow fonder because she received an engagement ring for Christmas Eve!!! He asked us permission the night before we picked her up at the airport and after we established that a wedding would not happen until after college graduation, all was well. He’s a wonderful young man. </p>
<p>I would say to Dizzymom that your husband should realize that just because it was disasterous for him, does not mean it will turn out disasterous for your son. I realize this is easier said than done!</p>
<p>Relationships CAN last, as the above posters have shown. However, there is also a strong chance that one or the other will meet someone else at some point. You can’t predict when this will happen, but this seems to be what usually breaks up the high school relationship.</p>
<p>My DS and gf have been dating off and on since junior high, steadily for the last 4 years. She’s a year older and headed off to college fall before last. I thought that would be then end of it, I mean what self respecting freshman girl wants to come home for her boyfriends senior prom! But, it lasted. This fall he headed off to a different school, in a different state. I thought it would end. NO, they just plan weekend visits once or twice a month and talk every day (probably several times a day). She is trying to get everything in order to transfer to his school next fall. We’ll see if non-stop togetherness will be the end. If not, I will happily welcome her into our family (hopefully in about 4 years).</p>
<p>I’ve been seeing my HS sweetheart since 1965, with a little 35 year break in there.</p>
<p>D1 +BF both college sophs on opposite coasts,together since junior year of HS. They may swim in different ponds but they like the same water.</p>
<p>Grandparents: step-brother and step-sister (sounds really weird and repulsive doesn’t it?) - happily married to the very end</p>
<p>Parents: next door neighbors, married at 20 (mother) and 22 (father) - still happily married</p>
<p>Sister: went to school with her future husband since kindergarten, started dating during high school, married at 20 - still happily married 25 years later</p>
<p>I’ve always wondered if step-siblings could marry each other or if it would be viewed incestuous despite no blood relation.</p>
<p>Makes you feel better, my grandparents are second cousins (or even first cousins…
but it’s allowed in our society-which is not my location) and another aunt and uncle of mine (third/fourth cousins?) married each other, too.</p>
<p>My eldest sister and brother have been together since the end of secondary school in Asia and all the whole through college in Dublin. Now my parents tell her to make sure she gets a steady job before she accepts his proposal.</p>
<p>I see a whole new 21st century plot line for the Brady Bunch in this thread…</p>
<p>For those who asked, my husband’s alarmist view may or may not be unfounded. While opposites do indeed attract, our son and his gf come from fairly different backgrounds in terms of core values; also, she parties, he doesn’t; she is quite materialistic, he is not; he’s at an Ivy, she is unhappy at her very small college and is apparently planning to return home and attend community college and eventually transfer to a large state school junior year. She can be very dramatic, and I don’t think my son is properly equipped to handle that.</p>
<p>My husband strenuously objects to the sense of “ownership” exercised by the young woman over the much less emotionally mature young man. Five of our son’s good friends have come to me over the past few months with the concern that the young woman is (with our son’s complicity, I remind them) cutting our son off from his other friends. This hits a real hot button for my husband, who believes that she exercises a similarly negative impact on the family relationship.</p>
<p>My view is that there’s little we can do anyway and that our son will have to make his own mistakes in life, just as we did. Husband cannot bear it.</p>
<p>I can’t decide whether I’m being irresponsible or my husband is trying to over-parent.</p>
<p>The guy that I’m now engaged to I met while I was in high school. He didn’t go to my high school but we met my senior year. And then I went to college 2.5 hours away and my freshman year was hard. Even though I drove up to see him every weekend.
Now that I am a sohpomore he moved in with me. And I think that the separation was better than us living with eachother. Since I am a very involved college student, he never gets to see me except when I get home at night when I tired and want to go to bed.
So I think that having a long distance relationship is better when a person is in college. If both the individuals are in college then that would be a different story. But since he had already graduated college, and I am in it, it makes it difficult. But we are still together, to answer your question.</p>