<p>Me and my boyfriend plan on going out tomorrow night. Afterwards I plan on inviting him to my room. How can I politely ask my roommate to leave? </p>
<p>I was thinking of just saying “Hey will it be ok if I bring my boyfriend up to our room after our date?” I was also going to add that I will have him out by 11:30 since I know she likes going to bed around that time. I’m also kinda embarrassed to ask her so do you think it’ll be ok to ask her over text? Thoughts?</p>
<p>***We get along very well btw. We’re good friends I guess you could say.</p>
<p>If you let her know in advance, I am sure she can find something to do or make plans. </p>
<p>Just be like hey, tomorrow my boyfriend and I are going on a date and I’d really appreciate it if you gave us some alone time from x:00 to 11:30. I’ll text you when I am on my way back. Thank you! </p>
<p>I think it’s fine to ask through texts. Just do it in advance – soon… ASAP – so she has enough time to plan. My former roommate asked me through text always but what made me mad was the fact that she never did it in advance and told me an hour before, or when I was already on my way home to the dorm in 10 mins.</p>
<p>texts are fine and as lullabies is saying, with advance notice (DO IT NOW) it’s really not asking too much if she doesn’t have a big test or paper this week (i.e. before the weekend).</p>
<p>Also, as lullabies said, make sure your request actually specifies that you’re asking for the room to yourself. While your roommate would probably get the hint if you just asked about bringing your BF back, it will be much less awkward if you lay it all out now rather than bringing your BF back to find her there and then having to ask her in front of him to leave, as well as more courteous to her so she can make plans on what to do during that time</p>
<p>Yes, having a defined time with plenty of advance notice is the right way to do it. </p>
<p>(Showing up drunk with a guy at 3 AM and waking up your roommate to say they need to leave, before they have a big test in the morning, is the wrong way to do it.)</p>
<p>I would say this is a conversation you should have had generically before a specific day came up when you wanted to do this… just talking generally about whether it is okay to (maybe with x frequency, once a week?) allow either of you to clear the room for a couple of hours. Maybe try to give advance notice, no hard feelings if the roomie has a reason for saying no, and it has to be during hours when roomie would not normally be sleeping.</p>
<p>I think the text phrasing in post #3 does not give the roommate much option and is actually kind of rude because of that. This first time I would actually ask face to face, and maybe talk about how you want to handle this going forward. Once you have an agreement, then texts are fine.</p>