<p>yankeedoodles - it’s not the point. the fact that you went and bought her a car - as opposed to saying, “Hey, sweetie, you’re nearing 16 - we should talk about your plans for driving - what do you think?” just reinforces her point of view that parents decide the course of action and she goes along. Indeed, saying no to the car may have indeed been an act of independence on her part. I know you meant well - trust me, I’ve been down this same path - but from her point of view, it may feel like just more reinforcement that the parents are the key drivers (no pun intended) of what will happen in her life.</p>
<p>Why can’t you just refuse to make decisions for her?</p>