How to support a 6th-grade daughter who loves writing (when I am terrible at it!)

I use AI every day, and have found it invaluable for the mountains of writing I need to do at times. Writing employee reviews? Hugely time-consuming. But teaching AI how to write MY kind of employee reviews, with specific inputs based on the employees development needs? Piece of cake.

But I’m not 11 years old. I understand sentence structure, writing a topic sentence, character development, etc. And I understand how to use irony, metaphor, etc. AND understand when idiomatic phrases are appropriate and when they are not.

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Exactly. You learn how to write by writing. She has to do the work to get better (and how great is it that she loves the work!). A book with writing prompts and tips would be better, because it could be the source of inspiration and advice without being adaptive and doing the work for her. Good old-fashioned non-adaptive resources (books!) will empower her to follow her own creative instincts. Also, writing is intensely human – technology doesn’t make one a better writer.

OP, you don’t have to have mastered a skill or craft to encourage your kid as she pursues it (that’s part of the fun, really – I’ve learned so much from my kids, who’ve developed interests completely outside of my areas of expertise). You’ve already gotten lots of great ideas, but thing I want to reiterate is that great writers develop their talents by becoming great readers. Stock her shelves and get her a library card so she can derive inspiration from what she reads. That goes for you, too – if you want to learn a thing or two about writing, start reading more on your own (not suggesting you don’t).

I don’t know what resources are available to her in middle school, but when she’s in high school, encourage her to join a creative writing club, the school newspaper, and/or a school literary magazine if there is one. If any of these resources are also available in middle school, then now is a great time to start!

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AI can teach a 6th grader all of the things that you list.

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Reminder that this is not the cafe. Points about AI made. Please take further back and forth to pm.

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Check your local public library. Many have summer reading programs. And many also offer a sort of prize for completing what they set forth.

Our kids loved that. We went to the library together once a week. Everyone in the family chose at least one book. Our kids always took part in the library festivities at the end of the summer. And we always took them someplace to celebrate too.

The whole family had a “reading time” everyday…about 30 minutes. We did not do anything else during that time. Of course, anyone could read longer than that. But this 30 minutes was set aside as family reading time.

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I know my viewpoint may be different, but I would not be too involved in getting her to read, or worry too much about being part of her writing (dance, drawing). I would just let her be, and be there, so to speak. She may or may not be too old to read to/with her. She sounds like she is doing fine and knows you are present for her. Certainly drive her to the library and activities if she cannot get there on her own. And listen!

ps If she is on screens a lot, that can be one obstacle to reading.

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Sounds like my kid. When she was that age, she started writing poetry, she drew obsessively, and she was taking three dance classes weekly. By 8th grade, she had to drop her music (Clarinet in Orchestra), because her dance had expanded to the point that she didn’t have time, and she prefer dance to playing music.

She did a part art track in high school, she still draws, she still dances, and she still writes poetry. In college she ended up in a residence for artists who were not art majors. Her track is Neuroscience (she’s doing her PhD in Neuroscience), but all of those activities continue to make her life a lot better.

She did for a bit think of doing a creative-writing minor, but she decided to focus more on her major (since she was thinking of grad school)

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I wouldn’t push too hard for “joint reading”, particularly if she’s not super enthusiastic about reading. But maybe have her recommend something to you. When DS was a little older, I often read things he’d read for English, and we’d talk about them – if he was in the mood.

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Kids are interesting regarding their interests. Ours began purchasing and memorizing TV & movie scripts at age 8 or 9.

Maybe OP’s 6th grade daughter will find a way to continue her passion on her own.

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Thanks for all the helpful information. Sorry for not responding earlier. I had a 7 hour trip each way to get my son back from college and then my spouse has to make an urgent 20 hour flight trip at the same time.

blossom - I really like your idea “low stakes reward”.

AustenNut - Thanks for the book suggestions and to focus on spending time to find books of interest.

I came from a poor immigrant family. I loved books but could not afford even 2nd hand books. In my teens I used to daydream about robbing a bank to buy all the books I used to window shop. So when I got my first job in 1997 and Amazon started, I bought at least a $1000 of books each year since then. :grinning_face:

Shelby_Balik - Creative writing club is definitely of huge interest to her.

thumper1 - The idea of “Family reading time” is genius.

MWolf - Your daughter sounds exactly like my own. She is not that into Viola and not showing much interest even though she takes it at school.

Thanks again for all the help!

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There are lots of writing workbooks available. Many parents get ‘bridge books’ to keep their kids interested in school over the summer, as a review of the past year’s math, reading, writing, etc. They are full of word games, art projects, reading, writing. Sometimes there are answers in the back.

I love learning grammar rules so have a few books around the house (some since my kids were in grade school and they are now 29 and 30. Some have word games or puzzles, little quizzes about grammar. She can learn a lot by doing crossword puzzles. the American bar association news letter used to have (maybe still does) a column called ‘The Grammatical Lawyer’ where the author would take a grammar problem and answer it, like when to use further and farther, when to say ‘Whether’ or ‘whether or not’ (and it sometimes matters. Yep, I’m a nerd but found them fun.

Does she speak a second language? I learned a lot about grammar by studying French. Make sure it includes reading and writing the second language,not just speaking.

At her age, I actually think quantity is as important as quality of the writing. My aunt writes books for young adults, and she would tell her own daughters (who became a librarian and a think tank researcher) just to write write write (they were both big readers too). If your daughter wants to fill 10 spiral notebooks this summer, let her. Write silly stuff like poems without using the letter O, or a page using the words to, too, and two as many times as she can.

I have to say you don’t get a pass because you have more in common with your son. You are a girl dad too. If she likes ponies, you like ponies. If she wants to talk about Taylor Swift friendship bracelets, that’s your new favorite topic. Don’t worry,it can be fun.

You don’t need to be a teacher to come up with prompts. Open a book, find a word and have her write about that word: Wednesday, blueberries, ice cream flavors, Italy, zoo animals…it all works. Make it a game. Set a timer. Limit the number of words. Fiction, non-fiction.

This week I saw a biography about Anne Rice, who writes about vampires. When she was little (like 6) she just wrote and wrote and wrote all the time. Her sister said she sent the writing to publishers and never had anything published but she never stopped writing and didn’t care that it wasn’t any good. Quantity over quality. Took her many years to get published.

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I think this point has already been made – but you don’t need to know anything about your child’s interests to be supportive of those interests. As long as you prioritize her pursuits of her own interests as much as you do her brother’s pursuit of his own, you’re good! Just give her a chance to share her work with you, and maybe teach you a thing or two, and it can still be a bonding experience.

I’ve learned a lot from my kids’ interests in WWII-era planes, baseball history, cold-blooded animals and their ecosystems, Ancient Rome … you name it!

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