<p>Keep the good news comin’ RVM. :)</p>
<p>I’m glad things are looking up, RVM. I hope things get settled soon so you and dwhite can relax and get some sleep!</p>
<p>Sending positive thoughts y’all’s way.</p>
<p>New Grad D has a job offer that is perfect for her major and interests. The salary seems realistic (little experience, new grad) but low, really, and the cost of an apartment or roommate situation and commuting will be considerable. (Not near home – big city.) I personally really struggled financially when I was starting out and not in any good way – could not afford to go to dentist (long term problems as a result), car not maintained safely, crummy roommates, and so on --. I had expected that D would have to take an unpaid volunteer position before being hired so her job offer is great. However, I would like to help her with rent or expenses. Question –
is she better off without help? I personally was not. I am talking an extra 400$ or so a month for awhile. My sense is that this is a starter job for her and will lead to better opportunities.</p>
<p>I would be willing to supplement a child’s income but before I did I would want to sit down with them and see a realistic budget (that they have created) demonstrating the shortfall and how your money would be spent. Skimping on health care, renter’s insurance can result in greater expense down the line. Another way to help, which we did with one child, was keeping him on our health insurance until he turned 26. (He had the typical grad student coverage, no vision, no dental. He made sure to see all his doctors one more time just before he turned 26.)</p>
<p>mom4college - I am completely willing to help out - to the tune of a few hundred/month - for the first year. I would want to discuss the budget - and make sure they are saving some money every month for emergencies. Safe place to live - safe car - adequate medical care - absolutely - I would help with these essentials.</p>
<p>rockville – The job’s location makes it impractical but she wants to pursue the opportunity. Since I was planning to fund a non-paid volunteer position just so she could get some experience, helping with rent will cost me less and give me peace of mind.</p>
<p>Makes sense to me - I would do the same. My first job after graduation was in Washington, DC - my salary was about $15,000 and my rent was $525/month - my parents paid it for the first year.</p>
<p>1more – forgot about renter’s ins. D is on our health ins. There isn’t so much a shortfall as just very little left. 400$ a month plus gas money gives her breathing room and safer choicest-- don’t want her driving on empty tank, for ex. or not having grocery money </p>
<p>I was flat broke and it didn’t build character. It put me in scary situations.</p>
<p>I’d help out but I’d would want to make sure there was a budget. I would probably not want to give x dollars instead I would pay for certain things like the utilities or the car insurance which might be expensive for a young person. In addition I would give a gas credit card that is linked to my account so that I just pay the bill when it comes.</p>
<p>My new grad is in a different situation as she graduated with a musical theatre degree so she has to have a survival job that allows her the freedom to audition during the days. She is living in NYC, but moved further uptown a couple of months ago with a roommate to a less expensive place. She is in a 5th floor walkup close to a subway stop in a decent area. D took the smaller bedroom so she pays less rent than her roommate. </p>
<p>D can stay on our health insurance (includes dental and vision) until she is 26 and she is only 21. We are also keeping her on our family cell phone plan. Since she lives across the country from us we will fund her trips home for the holidays. We also told her we would pay her rent and all other expenses through September. This way she is able to save almost all of the money she will make at the job she has this summer. She received a nice check from her grandparents for graduation which she also saved. With her summer income this will give her a decent cushion. She thinks she already has a job lined up for the fall which will be able to cover her expenses and leaves her days free for auditions.</p>
<p>We are certainly willing to help her out if she needs it. D graduated college in 3 years so H and I saved money on not paying for a 4th year of school.</p>
<p>So - S1 has the job - pending the completion of the background check, which I am sure will be fine. The pay is mid 20’s, which is not great, but not horrendous, IMO. It includes benefits and paid time off. I know so many college grads are unemployed or working pt jobs without benefits. So, overall, I think this is good. But I was shocked and disappointed by my husband’s reaction. He thinks that given the university son attended, graduating cum laude with a finance major, this job is disappointing. He is angry that S1 did not apply for other jobs that might have been more in line with the finance major and paid more. I disagree. S1 has always wanted to work in sports, and that is what he is doing. He never wanted an office job at a bank, etc. I am not overly concerned about the pay for this year - let’s see where he is a few years down the road.</p>
<p>What do you all think? Is it a horrible salary? I don’t want DH to say these things to S1. I’m quite upset with DH at the moment. Thoughts?</p>
<p>So sorry Rockvillemom. Well I think your H is being silly but that’s me. This is your S’s life and his mistake to make or not make. He got the job he wanted and is willing to accept less in order to have his dream. His, not yours, not your H’s and not mine. But it sounds like your S is happy and willing to make sacrifices.</p>
<p>But dads have a tough time of it, he had hopes and dreams too. And it’s hard for them, men like to control and fix things lol!</p>
<p>Congrats to your S. We may be looking at the next Theo Epstein :)</p>
<p>Firstly, congrats to your son (and you) on finally getting this settled.</p>
<p>If this job is in the area he wants to pursue and would help him in securing future employment in that field, then it’s probably a good place for him to start.</p>
<p>As far as the salary, it seems a bit low to me, but I live in the northeast and have kids that live in Boston and DC. For them, the salary would be low. I’m assuming the cost of living where your son is located is lower than those places. How well could he support himself on that salary? Then again, this is only his starting salary, and he does get benefits and vacation.</p>
<p>I can understand your being upset with your husband. I would hope that he doesn’t say anything to your son that might alienate him, but this would be an issue for your son and husband to work out.</p>
<p>He is in NC and for that area - where he can rent a nice 1-bedroom apt - in a gated community with a pool - for $600/month - I think it works fine. His expectation is to net $1600/month. He does not have a car pymt or other debts. I think he should be fairly self sufficient financially. And yes, the job is a good first rung on the ladder for what he wants to do. I was just so shocked by my husband’s reaction. I think my son is very willing to pursue his passion, even if the pay is lower than a job in finance-related field - and you are right - that is his choice to make. It just feels so anti-climatic that he finally has the job and husband was so mad he wouldn’t even pick up the phone to congratulate him. Tonight - he is really being a jerk.</p>
<p>I didn’t see this thread till now…
D starts her job in her major, in a narrow interest of her major that she is very interested in, on Monday. The firm is commutable from our home.
She was initially interested in another firm in NYC - she had the right internship experience and got through to the second interview. They asked for a third interview on site, she replied with her available times and then…nothing! So she took the initial job at the place close to home and is now really psyched about the opportunity, the contacts, the experience, the whole she-bang. Even living at home does not seem so awful. 
Well, of course, last week she heard from the big NYC firm. She wants to stay with her commitment to the first but doesn’t want to alienate the big firm in any way as, despite the awful treatment, she would like to work there some day.
Any ideas for an email reply that will keep them interested in her down the road??</p>
<p>rvm, I’m so very sorry about your husband’s disappointing reaction to your son’s good news. I’ve been there, when my kids have accomplished something and my husband will acknowledge it, but with a qualifier attached. It makes my heart ache for my boys. Just keep doing what you do so well-- providing a sounding board, a shoulder, and a pep squad for your son. And congrats to him!!!</p>
<p>Cost of living is much lower in most parts of nc so he should be fine.</p>
<p>Hopefully he can use this as a building block to keep moving forward. I’m glad he is doing what he wants to do!</p>
<p>RVM-a big congratulations to your son. </p>
<p>I agree with the other posters that this is his decision to make and if he is happy, then it’s great, wonderful news. I am sure he is WELL aware that given his academic credentials, he could have marketed himself and gotten a different type of job with more pay. But at what expense? Giving up his dream/passion? At what other point in his life will he have the luxury to pursue his dream job without finances, a family, etc being a major concern? </p>
<p>He isn’t committed forever either -he gives it a shot and if it doesn’t work out, he moves on. He sounds like a very smart, motivated kid with a plan - remind your husband to give him the time and support to let that plan work out.</p>
<p>Thanks for the support - I just needed to vent. This has been very stressful. I’m just glad he has the job and hopefully DH will just chill.</p>