@VinceLestrade I am beginning to wonder if this is real. You have to change every day . And no one really cares what you look like.
I think this is spot on. I, too, am a very “personally” private person and was terribly uncomfortable with all the physical examinations and procedures during my pregnancy, and I was terrified of the birth event. By the time it rolled around, though, and once I was in labor, I didn’t care if a troop of Boy Scouts came in to watch. Obviously, this isn’t a scenario you’ll ever have to experience, but there is something about actually going through these common events that normalizes them.
As for showering, our son’s experience will make you laugh. He is an only child and always had his own bedroom and bathroom. However, he chose a service academy for college and on day one had to shower with 40 of his closest friends in an open room with ten showerheards per wall, towels and robes optional! I thought he might quit then and there. Nope. He got used to it very quickly because it was “normal” for that environment. (What really disturbed me was the length of time he had to get used to going without a shower during summer field exercises. Just yuck.)
Anyway, your posts indicate that you are trying to be open to new experiences, so I think you’ll be fine. Best of luck.
@EconPop — I guess anything is possible 
I definitely think I’ll acclimate to my new environment, especially if they ensure basic privacy.
@jym626 — Where do most people change? I cannot imagine getting naked in front of some random stranger.
@ChoatieMom — I appreciate the support. I do hope I will become more comfortable, and find some arrangement that works for me.
Assume the college will not “ensure” your perfectly planned living environment. Assume you are stronger than you currently think you are. Assume you will be able to adapt to new situations, overcome your fears, and grow into a more confident young man. I assume all that is going to happen for you.
Good luck to you on the next stage of your life journey!
Somehow this thread just reminded me of the fun of boot camp. 60 some guys sharing a barracks and a bathroom with zero privacy. One large group shower, a row of toilets with no doors, NO PRIVACY. Was it ideal? Nope, but we all managed to survive.
I can understand your stressing but it will be ok.
@EconPop — Thanks, I appreciate your confidence.
@MarylandJOE — Yeah, I’d imagine that’d take a lot of confidence and humility. I will do my best.
My son’s tech school suite style dorms has 2 double occupancy bedrooms with a shared living/dining/kitchen for the 4 men in that dorm. They have a full bathroom for just the 4 of them and then another sink area as well.
You sound like an intelligent young man. Im guessing you want to go on to do great things in your career. Consider navigating dorm life as gaining life skills in adaptability which is what a future employer would want to see.
It appears Emory freshman housing does not have the private bathrooms you may seek. Perhaps look up dorm rules and see if lofting your bed might be an option. That way you could add curtains or drapes and create a little privacy lounge if that works for you. Most colleges have pretty good photos/layouts/and videos of their dorms so check those out.
@2plustrio — Thank you so much. I really appreciate you not being judgmental about things. I know my anxieties are overblown and my sensibilities odd, so I’m glad you have provided me with good encouragement and advice.
Where to change your clothes: I am guessing that most college bathrooms have private shower stalls (any I’ve seen did, and also, the shower bathrooms on each floor were single gender). Some also have a small compartment to change or set your stuff down. You can change in there, if there is room, and there probably will be. Also, you’ll get used to your roommates’ rhythms, such as when he goes to shower ('you’ll know, cause he’ll be taking his stuff with him). That could be another time for you to change.
My S as a freshman was lucky enough to get the Jack-and-Jill type dorm, with a private bathroom for 4 people. Then you don’t have to leave your room at all; but you could still change in the shower area if you prefer. But even if you are placed in the typical common (yet single gender) bathroom for each hall, you can still change in the shower stall if you prefer.
@TS0104 — That’s good advice. I definitely will need not worry whatsoever if I was to receive a small-suite- or single-room-styled dorm arrangement. I’m looking into dorm options at some of my top picks right now, per your recommendation and those of others.
Also keep something in mind. Even though you care greatly. It’s most likely that your roommates won’t care. Sometimes you just go with the flow. For some people it’s more of a religious thing and I respect that. But college is about learning and adjusting. No one knows where your going to and how the room /shower situation will be. I am positive you will find a way and figure it out on your own.
@Knowsstuff — Yes, I think my anxieties will be lessened significantly once I know more about what my living situation will be like.
What you’re missing is that they will not be strangers. It’s not like going to a hotel and having to share a bathroom with all the people on the floor. In a dorm, the other students on your floor end up becoming sibling-like .
@brantly — Most dorms I’m looking at have dozens of students to a bathroom. I don’t want dozens of siblings, nor do I think I’d be able to develop such a relationship with so many people. Also, there’s bound to be a least a few annoying people out of that number; I don’t want to be chummy with those people.
You will never like everyone around you, but you will want to learn how to live with/get along with them. You can request a single if you have a letter with a diagnosed disability (eg anxiety disorder/social phobia) from your treating doctor.
@jym626 — Yeah, I won’t beef with them or anything, but I’m just saying they won’t be like my brothers: I won’t feel comfortable around people I dislike. All that means is that I’ll want to be clothed around them and not talk with them extensively. I don’t want to be vulnerable around them. That doesn’t mean I can’t live with them, I’ll just have to do it more similarly to apartment neighbors than brothers or best buds.
Here is something to keep in mind. The housekeeping staff is in charge of cleaning those gang hall bathrooms every single day. If you have a bathroom in your suite, you and your suite mates will be in charge of cleaning it.
The people on your section of your floor in your dorm…are your dorm mates. Get used to it. You will see them coming and going all the time, every single day…whether you share a bathroom…or not.
Please be a little more open minded about this.
There was a girl my freshman year who hated the hall bathrooms…and only showered in the middle of the night…think 2 a.m. or so. Everyone else on our floor developed a sort of camaraderie as floor mates. She was an outsider by her own choosing.
Don’t be that outsider. I’m hearing you have never shared a room, never changed clothes in a locker room, etc. Maybe sign up for swim lessons right now…and get used to the locker room feel. It’s really not as awful as you are making it out to be. And thousands upon thousands of college students share these facilities.