I just got expelled for sending nudes to myself - 3 months before I walk for Graduation

The title says it all. I am forty thousand dollars in debt for tuition. I haven’t told some of my close relatives that are supporting me financially, and I also have hardly said anything about his to my friends. A while back (16 Months), I sent naked pictures from a girls phone. She found out, called the cops, and now I am sitting in one of the worst situations I have ever experienced.

This experience for me has brought me to a low that I have never experienced before. I feel that I am on the cusp of depression or on the verge of making a breakthrough on how to live a better life. I am ready to change, but I don’t know what steps to take now.

The college degree doesn’t really matter to me because I learned what I needed to from it a long time ago. I have always wanted to own my own business and work for myself, So this is what I am going to work forward to doing. In the meantime, I need some advice on what steps I should take towards making this a better outcome. What would you do if you were in my situation?

Get a lawyer.

I have one. They didn’t even give me a chance to appeal to the president before kicking me out of all my classes.

If that school will not let you finish then you will need to transfer out and finish up at another school. Others schools may balk also but some might let you in. Just keep applying until you find one and finish up your studies there.

This is a hurdle for you but not a wall. You can get over this bump even though it might feel overwhelming atm.

Being self-employed is a great way to make a living. I wish you the best.

You think it is worth it to find another college?

Was this the only time you did something like this or was it the only time you got caught? A good lawyer may get you out of trouble now but you are heading for more problems in the future.

It depends, you need to do some research. The most important thing to know is that this should be a wake up call and life change, but surmountable.

Transferring is not an option at present, unfortunately. Not at this time.

Yea tell me about it. Since this stint, I have stayed away from anything illegal.

Get a psychologist. This is exactly their domain of expertise. They can work with you to help you forgive yourself and let you emerge from your darkness to become who you want to be. It’s partially covered by health insurance.

I dont even know what I would tell them. I know this is something that I can get over, but when it first happened I seriously thought about ending my life.

You tell the psychologist exactly what you told us here. @ClassicRockerDad is correct. This is exactly what psychologists are for. You will learn to forgive yourself. But most importantly, you will learn why you engage in this behavior, why you sabotage yourself. I am, of course, making an assumption that this is not the first time you’ve done something serious like this to sabotage yourself.

My husband is a psychologist. People come to him all the time for this sort of thing. Usually, though, it is much later in life, after the person has been fired from several jobs or has had a long string of business failures. You are at a point in life to nip it in the bud while you are young.

Hugs to you OP…i know you have to be scared and remorseful and adrift on what to do next…i agree with rockerdad to see a therapist…mostly because you have nobody to talk to about this…and you need to talk about it. It’s a turning point, to be sure…and you need guidance on this…i guess i would say that there are many people in the world who have made terrible terrible errors…errors that can’t be walked back…and they found good ways to go forward.

Thank you, everyone, for the information. I will go speak to a psychologist soon. I do not understand why I do the things I do, but I think it is because I think it will put me ahead in life, now I am sitting where I am today; lower than ever.

I can tell by all of your posts on this thread @Lifehurts77 that you are well on your way to understanding yourself. You have not blamed anyone else. You have not made excuses. You have stated outright that you do not understand your behavior. It often takes the first three to six months of therapy to even get to that point. You’re already there. You will make good progress in therapy.

Also, yes, getting the degree, from any college, is worth it. Even if you want to be self employed, having the full degree (v. Being 15 credits short of graduating) will make a difference in the long run.
What sort of penalty is there for your crime, is it considered misdemeanor or are you facing jail time? How old was the girl whose naked pictures you stole?
Do see a therapist to figure things out, it will help you in the short term and the long term.

@MYOS1634 I have been charged with a gross misdemeanor and had to serve a couple weeks in jail over the matter in a plea deal that I took in return of getting rid of the Felony - Electronic Data Theft. The felony was scary as hell, and I told my prosecutor I would do anything to not have the felony on my record. I dodged a bullet in that matter but got shot in terms of my degree. I have a very nice lawyer taking care of the matter with my University and we will be suing if they rule on the expulsion instead of a suspension.

I also want to update everyone on my process in therapy. I told her everything about my habits and my history of crime, lying, and hurting of others. I still am learning why I do the things that I do, but I am on the right path. I consider myself extremely lucky to have come in contact with the people I have in the past year and have stayed away from crime for more than a year other than some mild shoplifting. It is sad to know that I have damaged my reputation, and have allowed for people to use this ammo against me. I desperately want to come back from this, I already have three charges on my record, but I think this is the beginning of my life and I can do this. Thanks for your guy’s support; you all are way better than the Reddit threads I have created.

Yes life can hurt very badly. Yes, you should seek mental health counseling. However, you only mentioned that the girl reported you. All would not have been OK if she had not reported you. You do not say what the outcomes for the girl, her privacy and reputation, her embarrassment that people saw the pictures posted and perhaps even moved on… How would your parents feel and react if the pictures were of your sister or other close family member. I would be more sympathetic if you thought about potential consequences for the girl.

@Zannah First of all I never said that I put the picture on the internet. They were for me only. I am not defending my crime, I am just saying that her reputation was not hurt at all. I also am walking this spring graduation because my lawyer is a boss.

I honestly think that what I did was not so wrong as it was creepy. I think I have some problems with sex and there is definitely something wrong with my mind. I have been having messed up thoughts lately and I only see my counselor every other week. She says I might have a conduct disorder or something. Thoughts of suicide are coming, and I hate them. I used to have such a positive outlook on life, and even if I do end up getting my degree before the President officially expels me, I don’t know if I will be able to do anything in this life. I am grateful for this body, but sometimes I just hate my past. I hate how I hurt people. And most of all I hate the unwanted thoughts that come into my mind.

I am trying to change, but I still feel like I am in a shell of regret. I cant think about anything else than my past and future, rather than what is important now. I

What kind of credentials does your counselor have? I am worried about what you are saying. You’re having intrusive thoughts. Do you have health insurance? I think you should see a psychiatrist. Is there a medical center associated with your university? That’s a good place to look. Don’t wait. You don’t want to end up in an emergency psychiatric situation. Obviously, I have no idea whether you are heading that way, but I just don’t like the sound of what you are saying. Better safe than sorry. Go to a psychiatrist and tell him or her exactly what you said above. @Lifehurts77