<p>Maybe you can just tell them frightening stories.</p>
<p>[The</a> Loch Ness Monster? Sonar picture shows ‘serpent-like creature’ at bottom of mysterious loch | Mail Online](<a href=“The Loch Ness Monster? Sonar picture shows 'serpent-like creature' at bottom of mysterious loch | Daily Mail Online”>The Loch Ness Monster? Sonar picture shows 'serpent-like creature' at bottom of mysterious loch | Daily Mail Online)</p>
<p>Onward–thanks! I never win anything so this excited me! Did I mention that that means on your “cooking day” you had to boat to a little town to shop. One year I planned on burritos but the store did not carry them. So I ended up making pizza. MIL was so upset because I did not serve the 15 tablespoons of 5 different leftovers. OH! and I was assigned 2! nights to cook because DIL had a 6 month old and I was known to like (not for them) to cook even though I had the screaming 18 month old. So MIL protected her D but no one took care of me.
OK since I am on a role. The last trip 2 years ago my MIL was making a cold cauliflower onion salad and 6 hot dogs and cookies–this for 10 people. 8 were men and 3 of those had been cutting trees all day. My H had health issues and was absolutely needing to gain back weight. Man the #### I took from her as I made a great rich potato main dish (forgot to mention 2 of the tree cutters were veggies). The best ? part was MIL’s nose dripping into the raw veggie salad. I gestured to H and he went and wiped her nose.
Guess I had better go now-wonder if we collectively have bestseller–OK name contest!</p>
<p>You all would love my parents… If only they were still with us. Mom was a pure city girl, Dad was a country boy, and yet they managed, and we thrived.</p>
<p>Dad designed and built a log cabin. Mom added flourishes like Waterford wine glasses. Dad hunted ducks, mom threw wild duck dinner parties for 12 at the cabin. Dad didn’t add a washer and dryer, but included a dish washer, which my mom REALLY wanted. She carried the laundry home from the cabin every Sunday for 40 years.</p>
<p>After 15 years of designing, building, furnishing and spending every weekend at the cabin, my mom handed my dad a brochure and said, “Honey, I love you. I am going on this trip to Venezuela in January. I’d love it if you’d come with me, but either way, I’m going”.</p>
<p>My dad thought about it for awhile, and against his preferred way of operating, which would have included a winter walk on the Lake Michigan ice in snowshoes, followed by a weenie roast, he agreed to go to Venezuela instead.</p>
<p>He loved it. From then on, they traveled somewhere fun every winter, and had marvelous weekends at the cabin the rest of the year. Here’s hoping missypie can forge some sort of compromise!</p>
<p>Reading about all of this makes me glad that my extended family doesn’t own houses on lakes that I know of or arranges vacations that are really family chore-a-thons…especially for the adults. </p>
<p>Part of that is with the exception of one aunt/uncle’s family, there’s a commonly felt sense that if you’re being invited as a guest to a relative’s home…even the mere suggestion that family members outside the host family perform chores/home improvement projects would have been taken as a sign the person making the suggestion doesn’t have good manners in the hospitality department. </p>
<p>If anything, even totally voluntary offers to pitch in on such chores/projects are almost always refused…guests are supposed to enjoy and relax themselves when staying at most of our homes/vacation properties. Of course, if the help is done in such a way that it’s fait accompali, it is graciously appreciated and accompanied by an emphatic “but you didn’t have to do that”. </p>
<p>If the house/property is merely slightly cluttered…not to say unsanitary as illustrated by prior posts of “mice feces in beds” and the owner actually thought it was ok to invite most of my family members over as guests in such conditions…the owners would certainly get an earful about it, no one will ever go back…or have much to do with them, and criticism of their housekeeping/sanitation standards would go on for decades. What were they thinking???</p>
<p>That’s not to say we don’t enjoy the great outdoors and nature…but the “roughing it” is for our individual selves only…we’d never presume to foist it on the rest of the family…especially in a guest on their property situation. </p>
<p>It’s one major reason why a hardcore “roughing it” camping cousin who spent several days camping in Alaska living off the land using skills gained in Boy Scouts and a limited amount of time at a Federal Service academy has yet to invite any other relatives to join him on such camping trips…even his fellow outdoorsy siblings who love to rough it as much as he does.</p>
<p>Fast forward. Breaking news:
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<p>We told her not to go…</p>
<p>LOL. I almost didn’t post this thread because I truly expected to be lectured for not being appreciative. I had no idea it was such a universal issue!</p>
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<p>We have got to be related in some way!</p>
<p>This thread made me remember more examples of the lakeside “hospitality.” When the kids were little and would get up early in the morning to see Grandma, she would knock on our door and say “your kids want breakfast.” And H would get up and pour them cereal. When they visited* my *mom, she made bacon and eggs and French toast and whatever else she could think of, and even let them eat it in front of the TV (something I was never allowed to do!) Other Grandma couldn’t even pour cereal for adorable pre-schoolers when she was already up.</p>
<p>I personally don’t like to have overnight company or be overnight company. I can totally relate to not wanting to fix breakfast for someone else’s kids day after day. EXCEPT the inlaws have always pressured us to visit.</p>
<p>If there is not one already there, you need this hammock: [Mosquito</a> Free Hammock Bliss, 67888 | Hammocks | Sleeping Gear | GEAR | items from Campmor.](<a href=“http://www.campmor.com/outdoor/gear/Product___67888]Mosquito”>http://www.campmor.com/outdoor/gear/Product___67888) It weighs less than 2 lbs, so it can fly there with you, and comes with a fully enclosed mosquito net. You might need some tree straps, and it maybe a rain/shade fly. Basically, it gives you a private room in which to read, listen to music (I recommend sound canceling head phones so you can’t hear MIL calling), nap, and in general escape. The only problem is that the rest of your family will also want to use it. Ignore them and pull rank. Actually, I love our lake cottage, but it has a real bathroom and a real kitchen with a dishwasher (added after MIL passed) so I understand your pain!</p>
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Thisthisthis, abasket. Those of you who suck it up and go on vacations like this are made of much, much better stuff than I am. The only way I could possibly do it would be by telling myself it was for the absolute last time. Then employing some combination of reading, sudoku, meditation, prayer, and sedation while I was there. Can this be the absolute last time for you, missypie?</p>
<p>I’d happily be the Prime Topic of Conversation for not being there if I meant I didn’t have to be there. :D</p>
<p>Gotta say…there are some great suggestions of things for the OP to BUY if she really liked the place at all. BUT sorry…if it were me, I would not be investing in mosquito proof clothing, hammocks, bug zappers and the like if I really didn’t want to go to the place.</p>
<p>As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized there is a middle ground…but I personally will not be the family doormat, and will not allow my husband or kids to be either. The minute I feel we are being taken advantage of…I speak up.</p>
<p>I still cannot see “family visit” being a vacation. We visit our family once a year in December and we go on vacation once a year in March. They also visit us in a summer. We have completely different expectations from each of these events.<br>
As a trial we might combine 2 into 1 if S. decided to have his family vacation at the same resort as we always have. He might take shorter one though. That means that one week will be combo family visit/vacation for us and another one will be our regular vacation. Since this resort is our absolutely favorite place, I can see that we will have a great fun both weeks. My grandkids love a lot of the same activities that we do and this resort has everything that we can possibly enjoy during vacation, great snorkeling right off shore, pottery painting, ping pong tables, beach volleball, dance lessons, long several miles beach to walk by the water, gorgeous grounds, all inclusive with great food and drinks and tons of latest books that people leave behind (including us) to minimize the luggage weight.</p>
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<p>The point of the WHOLE thread is that the Lake vacation spot is NOT a favorite place for the OP. My guess is that if the lake house were a favorite vacation spot…this thread would not have been started.</p>
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<p>We would have NO WAY to visit our family once a year at any time. They live all over the world, literally. The OP is in the same boat. The family comes to the dreaded lake house…and that is where the family is. She has to do this on THEIR schedule…when THEY want to do this…and to a place she and her family really don’t like very much.</p>
<p>^By family I meant my S., I did not mean the whole familyt that also is spread over several continents. </p>
<p>In regard to your first comment, when we visit in December, we also visiting location that would not be our choice for vacation, not our favorite at all. We just have different expectaions and always ended up having great fun just being with the family, but it is not a vacation.<br>
So my suggestion is to separate two, if possible. Otherwise, I cannot see it as vacation, unless location is the best for everybody.</p>
<p>I also just again want to give CCers a thumbs up for their great sense of humor in the midst of real life problems. I’ll bet Missypie appreciates the humor as much as the suggestions!</p>
<p>(can’t you all be my real life friends- so fun!)</p>
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<p>That would have offically been my last visit to the lakehouse with the inlaws. I haven’t read all the posts yet, so I don’t know if you’ve said where the lake is located, but if I planned on going at all, I would plan it as a stop along the way to or from another vacation destination. Stop in for a day or two, order lots of pizzas, or pick up take-out from a local BBQ place and some paper plates…Hello/Goodbye! :-)</p>
<p>"MIL gave the kids a bowl of cereal when they got up, then took them outside and LOCKED THEM OUT OF THE HOUSE. Yes, it was to force my kids to enjoy nature instead of staying inside. But it was chilly in the morning and by afternoon they all claimed that they still had to take afternoon naps, just to be allowed indoors! "
-Fun? Vacation? It sounds sooo stressful, for no reason whatsoever, leave them kids alone, I hope that at least MIL herself had great fun doing that, otherwise it seems a wasted effort to entertain, not entertaining to others, for sure…</p>
<p>Re: post 72…are you saying that the family you are visiting in December is your SON? If so, that if VERY different than visiting extended family including parents/inlaws/aunts/uncles/cousins. It wouldn’t matter to me one lick where I visited my KIDS. That would be fun…even at the lake house (assuming NO ONE ELSE was there and my KIDS wanted to go…not the case in this family).</p>
<p>The issue in this thread is that there is an expectation that the OP and her family will make a grand appearance for a hostage vacation (love that) at a lake house they can’t stand. That being the case, I vote NO…don’t do it for a week. Do it as a “fly over”.</p>
<p>This thread is why we got a condo in Chicago for weekends instead of going Up North.</p>
<p>The last time I was up there was 5 years ago, for a family wedding. We stayed in a condo with the one set of relatives we like, near the wedding location. Everyone was very busy, so no one paid much attention to the fact that we weren’t at the lake house much.</p>
<p>We have taken some fabulous family vacations…last year we went to three countries in Europe. This was going to be a “no vacation” year since we spent so much last year. (I still have to take time off to take D to and from her distant college.) So now in the no vacation to save money year, we spend $$$ to go where I don’t want to go.</p>
<p>I don’t remember if I posted this or not, but when the topic came up last week, I texted all three kids simultaneously, and all three immediately answered something to the effect of “I’m down with that.” So it’s nice that they don’t have horrible memories of the place.</p>
<p>I really like some of the ideas y’all have posted. Son’s summer school class didn’t make, so I told him that he has to have a summer project, like making a movie. I think I’ll hand the video camera over to him.</p>
<p>I’m exhausted just thinking about your upcoming “vacation.” Ways to make the workload lighter: Order pizza or, for your nights to cook and clean, don’t. Bring a cooler filled with Costco casseroles and side dishes for all, along with individual servings of breakfast and lunch stuff. It’s worth paying extra for the luggage. Bring a load of paper plates n cups, plastic forks, so no dishes. Can’t bring it on the plane? Somewhere in that 3 1/2 hour drive there will be a store, buy the stuff on the way to the cottage, even if you have to drive out of the way, even if it costs a lot. If people complain that there’s too much trash that way, take a day trip to the local dump, giving you another excuse to get away. For bedding, bring silk sleeping bag liners, so no sheets. Tell each family member that they get one towel each to use for the visit, so limit the laundry there.</p>
<p>Become a bird-watcher so you can get far away from everyone at some point.</p>
<p>MiamiDAP- Did you even read this thread?</p>