<p>I know this isn’t related DIRECTLY to the actual admissions but its close. Basically I just want to hear your guy’s opinions. I broke up with by boyfriend (1 year older) and he’s going to Penn. He lied saying he was latino even though he wasn’t. And ever since he got in he was saying just how great an ivy is how he’s so smart, yadda yadda yadda. And now for the past 2 months all I can think about is being better than him. My dean said I have a shot into UChicago and I love the school, but I have this horrible nagging feeling that it isn’t an ivy, therefore it isn’t better than penn, therefore that jerk still goes to a better school. Its so exhausting. I’m so sorry if this sounds stupid but its literally tearing me apart. Has anyone gone through this? </p>
<p>Please let go of the old boyfriend and choose your college based on your goals and aspirations. And if you need a little counseling to let go of the relationship - there’s no shame in that. Do it. This is an important time in your life.</p>
<p>I tell my parents this and they say I’m stupid for worrying about him, so I came here.</p>
<p>Aim for UChicago. </p>
<p>Usually there are counselors at most colleges who can help young people deal with these common anxieties. So if you can’t work it out yourself and your parents won’t seek help - at least avail yourself to those services when you get there. Transitioning to adult can be hard and a breakup is normal. Try to focus on where you want to go with your life. Congratulations on doing well! Time to cash in on all the hard work. </p>
<p>You really need to rise above this level of thinking because it is unproductive and even destructive. Unless you are just being a drama queen over a recent breakup. Splitting hairs over which great school is a little greater is bad enough. But having to best someone to have personal satisfaction is pretty base and ugly way to live. It just affects you and makes you a small person. Spend some time getting out of your own head by doing something productive and stop thinking about college for while, maybe a good month moratorium. Try a yoga class, train for a half marathon, something physical would be good and something to center you. See if you can find friends to do it with you. If you find you can’t control your thinking patterns and still obsess, go see your doctor.</p>
<p>Forget the douce boyfriend. </p>
<p>I think you need to get in your mind that just because it is an Ivy League school does not mean that it is “the best”. Though Penn is definitely a great school, it does not equate to other schools in many regards. If you like UChicago, then go for it; think about what will make you truly happy rather than making your ex-boyfriend shutup.</p>
<p>Also, your ex-boyfriend sounds laughable. I apologize for Penn’s class of 2018 having a person of his character (deceitful and pretentious, by the looks of it) as a peer.</p>
<p>According to U.S.News, UChicago is higher ranked than UPenn. So, if UChicago accepts you, it means that you are better than him.</p>
<p>The problem is that UChicago may not accept you. Your weighted GPA is less than 4.0 and your SAT score is less than 2200. With those stats, you should probably aim for UC Santa Cruz or UC Riverside or perhaps some California State Universities.</p>
<p>Also, your boyfriend is messed up. Lying about race to get into a better college is not cool.</p>
<p>Lying about anything is not cool. </p>
<p>Forget him. (Easier said than done, I know.) He sounds like a jerk. He’s off to Penn in a few more weeks and he’s going to be up to his eyeballs in new girls to look at. Focus on your college applications and your own future. There is so much more to life than this. Really.</p>
<p>You are well rid of that liar.
No matter where you get accepted, you are already better than him. So chin up!</p>
<p>What BrownParent said. </p>
<p>Also, if it makes you feel any better, simply by not lying about your race on your application you automatically make yourself more respectable than him. If you get into a top school and then choose to not get an ego that rivals the size of some European countries, you would be double one-upping him. </p>
<p>You will feel beyond stupid in 10 years if you let a former boyfriend dictate where you should apply to college or what the best fit is for you. Put him out of your mind COMPLETELY. And put the idea that you need to go at prestigious college out of your head. MAYBE one is the best fit academically and socially, reasonably priced, and you can get accepted. But maybe some other school is as good or better for you. Make a list of your criteria for a college and use that to look. Get this guy out of your head, be smart enough and independent enough to shut his influence out of your college search.</p>
<p>Ditto on all of the advice. Out of sight, out of mind. Once he goes away you can forget about him. He will no longer be a part of your life (unless you choose that). He can try to keep up his ties via a computer, phone or whatever but you can ignore him in all media. He is past history. You have a present and future of your choosing. </p>
<p>Chicago is more prestigious than Penn, but only apply there if you think it is a good fit for you. Remember that those Ivy league professors often went to public U’s and other grad schools. And they write the books used at them- check out books required for courses like I did at Harvard’s bookstore once when on a vacation (son wouldn’t even see the school when visiting Cambridge with his dad, we parents did it later).</p>
<p>The name of the school you go to is largely insignificant in the long run. What is significant is how hard you work at whatever school you attend and what skills you develop. A top student at a state school will be better off than a poor student at an ivy league school. </p>
<p>Why is this so important? Go where you want to go and stop worrying about him. You are giving him too much control and importance such that your whole life is based on him. What’s worse is that he knows that you’re giving him that control. He can say “jump” and you’ll say, “I already did!”
Apply to your schools and study and do well, that’s the sweetest feeling.</p>
<p>You know what they say the best revenge is, right? It’s living well.</p>
<p>You are giving an ex-boyfriend, who YOU broke up with, too much power over your life. If only he knew, he would be so flattered and full of himself. Would you really want him to know about this? Find something else to obsess over. This is a complete and trivial waste of time. He is suckering you in by his bragging, why are you even in contact with him?</p>
<p>Your flaw in your thinking is that going to a higher ranked school does not make a person “better” than another person. No matter if it were Harvard vs Western Kentucky University. People have inherent worth and value, which has nothing to do with where they go to college. </p>
<p>Hey guys thanks so much. I haven’t contacted him in a month but it just keeps floating back in. It’s getting a bit better though. </p>
<p>Read post #17 over and over.</p>