<p>High school sucked for me. Parents were extremely strict and I could not have fun. I have/had friends but they rarely talk to me or hang out with me because they know I wont be able to go (because of my parents). I never had a girlfriend or had any real fun. I just studied and did my work. My voice is not deep at all and I take a lot of heat for it. My teeth sucked but now i have braces and its getting better. I am going to buy clothes so I look good as well (worked full time this summer). I am going to a good school (can’t say what school though sorry), but it has prestige and good ranking. I love the school I am going to, college is amazing, but I dont want the same thing in high school. I want to get girls, be confident, and not be so skinny. I am currently working out and have been for the last 7 weeks. Hopefully i change, but I think i dotn have a lot of testostorone. How I can be more manly? I only have 10 days until college, I want to have a deeper voice, honestly that would make me happy. I worked so hard this summer and im sick of everything. I want to be confident and happy, but im tired of girls being so cold and my friends not being there for me. I was always just the “val” at my school who they only came to for help.I graduated a year early in HS to start over in college. I want to make these years the best. Please I tried everything, but give me tips to look and be more manly. I look like a kid and im tired of it. This is NOT a ■■■■■, i made a new account so people would not know who I am/what college I go to. I know you’ll say im fine the way i am… But I am not. I just want to be confident.</p>
<p>First - stupid things that matter in high school don’t matter as much at college. You’ll have a whole new set of friends and nobody will know much (if anything) about your high school life.
Second - hmm…voice - you might try learning to sing or act. You’ll learn how to get more out of your voice, and depending on how you speak, you might be able to shift your speaking voice to a lower register.</p>
<p>Learn to cook. Girls love guys who can cook. It doesn’t have to be complicated stuff, either. Get a dorm fridge and stock it with simple dessert stuff (e.g., vanilla ice cream, jarred cherries, whipped cream, chocolate shavings, and nice glass goblets for serving, maybe some candles for atmosphere). You’ll be the most popular guy in the dorm. :)</p>
<p>That is some really good advice, thank you so much. I am getting a fridge so that will definitely be something I am interested in, and ill look into that because I really do want to get more out of my voice. Oh and also I am starting a club at my college, is there anyway I can become a better speaker</p>
<p>You might want to see an endocrinologist if you think you have a low testosterone level.<br>
Seven weeks of working out isn’t that much - you may not yet see results - so keep at it, even when you start college.</p>
<p>Join lots of activities that you enjoy and become good at them. Find activities that are not academically related. Music, sports, religious groups, Greek, theatre, campus paper, International groups,etc. Gyms are good places to meet people. Try yoga and other types of body classes. Try new things.</p>
<p>Smile a lot. Be kind. Don’t be mean to anybody. If you are a good student, help other students who are not as good. </p>
<p>You sound like you might be a little depressed. If you are and it continues, talk to your RA or health services.</p>
<p>I’m sorry you’re upset about this. 
Don’t change your voice! Be yourself. But if you want to bulk up, start working out/ playing sports. Just be outgoing/silly/talkative. Initiate conversations with girls, and guys. You should be set!</p>
<p>You may want to join Debate or Toastmasters for public speaking. Focus on your interests and continue to develop yourself. Be open to new people and experiences and be confidant in who you are. You have achieved a lot already. Continue to grow and don’t worry about the superficial stuff.</p>
<p>I would first consult a medical doctor to find out whether in fact you have a low testerone level. If it is a medical problem, fix that first.</p>
<p>Aside from that, I would suggest just trying to be yourself, and not trying to fit into a mold of what you think a real “man” is. You want a girl to like you for who you are, not someone you are trying to be. </p>
<p>I also like the advice of getting involved in clubs and activities at your school. Pick things that you like (not things you think would be manly) If the Harry Potter Club is your thing, join that. You’ll connect with other people who share your interests.</p>
<p>Good Luck!</p>
<p>Sounds like you’re off to a great start. Just remember that once you start talking/interacting with others, don’t dwell on the bad parts of high school. It’s in the past. Try to discuss positive things…things you want to do. Be open to trying new things (with limits of course LOL). </p>
<p>To have friends, you have to be a friend. But just remember that if you want to have a girlfriend, you can’t always be the guy they all run to tell their problems to. Then you will be the “buddy”. </p>
<p>Take it slow and enjoy college. You’re going to have a great time…</p>
<p>After I posted, I saw some great advice posted. You’d be surprised how many people are in the same boat as you…as one poster said, be kind. Karma…</p>
<p>^ before he can even begin to THINK about ‘seduction’, he needs to be comfortable with himself. and what makes u so sure he’s asian???</p>
<p>this thread made me hear that song by that 50s (or was it the 60s?) boy band with those falsetto voices: “walk like a maaaaaaan, talk like a maaaaaaan!” i don’t know the words after that… </p>
<p>but seriously, get a blender and make yourself a green smoothie everyday for breakfast. experiment and make some protein drinks. and make time for regular exercise. you probably haven’t hit your growth spurt yet. many males continue physically growing all the way up til age 25.</p>
<p>as for the voice, there isn’t too much that can be done. do your parents have deep voices? i’m not real sure about the forced voice coach type of depth. you might end up sounding like tom brokaw, which would NOT be a good thing! just speak well and relax.</p>
<p>calimami -
Walk like a man my son
No woman’s worth
Crawling on the earth
Just walk like a man my son</p>
<p>thanks capenn! hahahaha</p>
<p>In regards to not wanting to be so skinny, take up a sport that you enjoy. I recommend a grappling sport like Wrestling, Jiu Jitsu, or Judo. These will make you a lot stronger, and because they’re martial arts will probably increase your self confidence. I’m sure if you’re going to big-ish school (10,000+) there is a grappling club of some sort.</p>
<p>That’s funny I tried wrestling to get tougher but after a week my mom saw I was all sweaty and tired a lot so she came to practice and told the coach I wasnt coming back, brings back a lot of bad memories</p>
<p>^Well then, once you go away to college and get out from under your Mom’s thumb, the manliness that you crave will start to flow naturally :)</p>
<p>Do see a doctor and make sure you don’t have any physical problem. </p>
<p>When you get to school, go slow on the booze. It can be SO tempting when you lack self confidence to try to relax in social settings by using booze. If you’re a bit depressed during the transition to college, at least at times–most people are–booze will make you feel worse. And too often when people get drunk, they do silly, immature things which create exactly the opposite impression from the one you want. </p>
<p>While I agree that it’s a good idea to exercise and to join ECs, I’d also recommend a few other things. </p>
<p>Take an interest in what other people do. If one of the guys on your floor is all excited because he got the 3 am slot on the college radio station and you don’t have an early class, listen. Tell him you did and find something to praise. If a girl on your floor is singing in a glee club concert, go listen. If you’ve never seen a lacrosse game or ice hockey, go to a freshman or JV game and watch and ask questions. If you see that an article in the school paper has an article written by a girl in your French class, tell her you enjoyed it. </p>
<p>The truth is on many college campuses there are a gazillion performers, writers, athletes and not a heck of a lot of audience for most things. And people who do these things are really happy when they have an audience. Don’t be afraid to admit your ignorance–most people are very, very happy to explain things to you. Of course, don’t just suddenly take an interest in everything the prettiest girls you meet do. It’s more just taking an interest in what other students you meet do and going out of your way to go to that chamber music concert, JV lacrosse game, modern dance recital, or one act play someone mentioned to you. ( I’m not talking about going to the varsity football game at a Big 10 school. )</p>
<p>Help with scut work. I’m not that outgoing myself. When I’m in a new situation I often volunteer for the clean up crew or sometimes I just stay and help without being asked. So, maybe you go see some foreign film because a guy in the dorm joined the film society and when it’s over, they have to stack the chairs or lug equipment back somewhere else, etc. Help. Don’t make a big deal of it, just help. It makes a good impression and is a good way to meet people. </p>
<p>When you do go to a party, consider going early. For most of us, it’s easier to start a conversation with strangers when there are 15 people there than when there are 150. Go a couple of minutes early to classes too. </p>
<p>Remember that everyone else is in the same boat. Everyone is starting over. Almost everyone is more than a little nervous. That includes the guys with deep voices and lots of muscles.</p>
<p>I realize that this probably is not crux of the problem at all, but based on what the OP is saying, his mother seem a bit…overbearing, to say the very least. I obviously don’t know her at all, so please let me know if I’m out of line. But coming to practice to tell the coach that he will no longer wrestle (all because he was sweating???) without consulting her own son first seems so unnecessary. </p>
<p>Back to the topic at hand: while having a high-pitched voice may not make you the “big man on campus,” a lot of women may actually find it endearing and could be interested in the skinnier build. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t stay exercise to stay healthy, but at such a large (I’m assuming) college, there are bound to be a decent number of ladies who would be interested in your brains and determination. Also, I agree with the posters who have suggested that you appear and act friendly, because many other students are just as nervous as you are and are also looking for friendship and people to talk to.</p>
<p>I know that as a guy, you probably judge girls a lot on looks. But girls (in my experience) don’t care as much. While being absolutely beautiful definitely helps you, girls are more interested in outgoing, nice (big one there), confident and charming guys.
In regards to your mom making you quit wrestling, the problem is already solved. No more mom to do that. You’re independent and can join whatever clubs you want. You’ll also have access to a gym through your school, so you can lift there. If all else fails, just do pushups in your dorm and pullups on a tree brach.</p>
<p>There will be lots of girls at your college, but please, spend some time getting to know them as people before you ask them out. Happykid has complained about this more than once in the past year saying, “How can I know if I want to go drink coffee with this guy if he hasn’t said a word to me before?”</p>
<p>Watching Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann sure taught me a lot about being a man.
Within the show are various manly quotes like
“Believe in the me who believes in you!”
“A true man doesn’t die even if he is killed!”
TTGL comes in either a 27 episode series or 2 compilation movies.</p>