<p>@LookingForward, I don’t think she needs to provide all her private information. She asked about the impact of moving schools on GPA and college admissions. This is a college admissions forum. </p>
<p>What what I read, I’m figuring that she is seeking empirical or anecdotal info if anyone has had any experience with transferring schools and its impact on GPA and college admissions process. That’s it. No psychoanalysis, no credentials vetting, just asking about the college process.</p>
<p>If a move happens, the parents will have to be very involved. When your niece comes home and says she’s going to hang out with “Mary Smith and Susie Jones”, her parents will have no history of these kids and their families. No matter how social the child may be, it’s never easy to switch schools as a teenager. Since your niece has gravitated to the wrong crowd in the past, she may very well do the same in a new school. The parents will have to stay on top of things.</p>
<p>Sometimes changing schools is what is needed if the current environment is just not working, but it sounds as if this family is giving up without ever having tried to improve the situation at the current school. Facilitating change takes hard work. Just switching schools and expecting a complete turn around is looking for an easy fix.</p>
<p>Does anyone, such as @EmilyBee 's story in the early posts, have any experience with transferring to another school in the midst of high school?</p>
<p>The transferring to a new school can be for any reason, such as a parents’ move to a new job, new home, etc.</p>
<p>I think this may perhaps help shed light on what happens to the GPA and to the college process after a move to a new school.</p>
<p>Well, BP, not all her private info, just why she thinks she knows better than the parents. And that she has pinpointed the exact causes of the apparent issues with motivation. I think assuming this is all roses and good intentions is also based on the same lack of info. She originally asked about the impact and let it morph into her absolute certainty she is right. We asked, based on what? (If you want to be literal about the first post, this may be based on talk at a family reunion.)</p>
<p>If you have been with this thread all along, you know I mentioned several times that I transferred in early 11th and found it an extraordinary experience. And that OP wants to move her but is concerned a grade drop will have an impact on college, that honors classes at her current hs might lead to a grade drop and affect college, that staying won’t have the “new school” to explain it when she applies to college, etc. It gets convoluted. This family is not moving, no job change was mentioned, no job loss, nothing about them being unfit- I’m afraid it coils down to aunt wanting this and aunt wanting this. And aunt knowing best. Maybe. But let us know.</p>
<p>So, The OP is allowed to ask a poster whether or not she is an atheist or agnostic, insinuating that the poster’s responses are influenced by this ? But nobody should ask the OP basic things that she has yet to answer ? </p>
<p>LookingForward, I understand your point. </p>
<p>I also learned a great deal from your sharing your experiences about your own transferring in 11th grade, and about your children’s middle/lower school experiences at a Catholic school. I also understand that you always have all the student’s best interest in at heart on all the threads you provide recommendations. :)</p>
<p>I might be too simple a person, but in my own very humble opinion, (and I’m only one voice in the many on this thread), I really don’t think we need the information to be able to provide insight into the college process for a student who moves school. </p>
<p>@lookingforward </p>
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<p>I suppose that would depend on your definition of unfit.</p>
<p>As for all of your other concerns: I did not fly in, have some corn of the cob, and call the local private school headmaster after seeing a report card. I have been monitoring this situation for far longer than a family bbq. I figured the student council transaction inferred that…</p>
<p>At this point, it sounds to me like there isn’t any downside to making this as a serious offer to your sister and her daughter. While I don’t think Catholic school is necessarily going to be the utterly transformative experience you seem to want, if you can afford a better school and she and her parents are on board, why not?</p>
<p>I do think, however, that you have to be prepared for the likelihood that your niece isn’t going to want to leave her current school, when push comes to shove - and avoid giving into the feeling that this would be a devastating mistake with catastrophic consequences. </p>
<p>I have younger twin cousins that sound a little like your niece from the description. They were sweet, personable, but not particularly intellectual or ambitious kids who went to a HS that seems comparable to the one you describe - not terrible, by any means, but not sending a lot of kids to great schools, and pretty easy to coast through. They did well in a non-honors track, played a sport, did some community service, and had a social group that mainly revolved around watching Pretty Little Liars and texting about crushes. They are now going into their senior year in a non-flagship state school; they are active in a sorority with a strong volunteering focus, and one is majoring in elementary education and the other in accounting. And I guess my question is, what is wrong with that? It wasn’t like they were from an impoverished family and going to a failing school where their innate skills were suppressed; intellectually curious middle class kids in decent schools generally have enough means at their disposal to go a more academic route if they are so inclined, and my cousins weren’t - which is fine; they’ve got other strengths. If they had gone to the much more competitive high school I attended, yes, there’s a decent chance they would have wound up at the flagship, but I don’t think the academic difference between that school and the one they go to, which they wouldn’t have appreciated anyway, is going to make a major difference in their lives. Maybe they would be more likely to get somewhat better or higher paying jobs with a better school on their resumes, but in the end there is every reason to assume that a year from now, one will be a first grade teacher, the other will be an accountant, and both will be on a path to live comfortable lives doing something they enjoy. </p>
<p>So again, I don’t see anything wrong with making the generous offer, but I think you need to step back for a minute and consider what it is you’re really afraid of. </p>
<p>@apprenticeprof </p>
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<p>Well, you just admitted that they were allowed to “coast” through school. Another word for that is “underachieve”. With all due respect, I happen to think a lot is wrong with that.</p>
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<p>Of course. A child that’s been allowed to coast will instinctive pick to stay in the easier path. But what’s the setback of the new school? Why should life decisions be placed in an immature 15 y.o.'s hands? She’s social, she’ll be fine. If this happens this week or next, it will be done and paid for and the next time my niece hears of it will be a casual “We have to go take a placement test.” Blowing it out of proportion and treating it like a big deal is a recipe for a teenage freakout.</p>
<p>Does she have a college plan? A career she is wanting to pursue?</p>
<p>@bisouu College preference is NYU or Indiana (Kelley), which requires her to strive for a 3.7 GPA and 30 ACT (super score). Career undefined, but working on that this summer…</p>
<p>do note: she’ll be a full pay, compliments of a caring relative.</p>
<p>Are you saying now that your niece won’t be allowed to say no? I think to many kids changing schools is a big deal. And if you push her into a different school against her will, it’s unrealistic to expect a good outcome. </p>
<p>@mathyone Against her will is a strong way to put it. She’s already receptive to the idea. Are you suggesting her and her parents sit down and have a lengthy conversation about it, thus blowing it severely out of proportion? Sounds like a recipe for a teenage freak out. I think that’s a bad idea. Pay tuition, take placement test, keep it casual.</p>
<p>THANK YOU EVERYONE ON BOTH SIDES OF THIS DEBATE. SO MANY COMPELLING POINTS. LONG DAY WORKING FROM HOME AND I MAY HAVE BECOME TESTY. I’M VERY SORRY.</p>
<p>“Are you suggesting her and her parents sit down and have a lengthy conversation about it,” Yes, actually, I am. If she is really on board, why would she freak out? </p>
<p>Holy cow, just holy cow.
This is a real head smacker. Poor kid. What’s next? In my book, keep it casual does not mean dictate. This sounds more like a control issue. Not the least because we are supposed to take OP at her word she is a blessing to this kid. </p>
<p>Could this be trolling?</p>
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Absolutely huge if that’s not where she wants to be. Especially at the high school level.</p>
<p>Right now she is at a place where she is getting by academically and doing well socially-- you don’t approve of her friends, but obviously she is well-liked and engaged in at least some EC’s.</p>
<p>She could end up in a place where she is academically overwhelmed, finds it hard to adjust to very different expectations as to classroom discipline, and perhaps has a hard time breaking into the pre-formed social groupings. It could turn out that the girls at the school are cliquish or simply not functioning on the same wavelength as your niece. “Fit” is just as important in high school as it is in college - probably more so when it comes down to it. </p>
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Why should life decisions be placed in an immature 15 y.o.'s hands?]/quote]</p>
<p>Because it is her life. </p>
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<p>You don’t know that. She’s now in an environment that’s a good fit for her socially-- so that’s why you perceive her as “social” — but you could be thrusting her into an environment where she will feel like a misfit or an outcast.</p>
<p>You can’'t just impose this sort of decision on a teenager – that is simply cruel.</p>
<p>If this is something she wants – fine. But the more you post, the more it sounds like is something you are intent on pressuring the family into. </p>
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Does she know what the admission requirements are for those schools? (It doesn’t really matter, she’s got a year and a half still to change her mind.-- but if the real issue is that you want to motivate her, then it seems to me that educating her about NYU admission requirements would be a good first step)</p>
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<p>Yes. that is absolutely essential. If this isn’t her decision - something that she is on board with, has considered pros and cons, and is making with the full knowledge of the different academic environment and expectations she will be faced with – then it is very likely that the outcome will be disastrous.</p>
<p>I will tell you one thing for sure: if she decides that she doesn’t want to be at that school, it will be very, very easy for her to arrange to get herself expelled. And that isn’t going to look good at all on a future college application. </p>
<p>When we moved overseas few years ago because of my job, we sat down with D2 to have a serious discussion with her. We offered her three options, 1) stay at her current school and live with her grandparents, 2) go to a boarding school, 3) move with us to the new country. We went through all the pros and cons with her. At the end, she was the one who decided to move with us. She wanted to experience living in a new culture. The first 2 months was very difficult for her. She cried almost everyday after school. She had no friends initially. I think if we had “forced” her to come and she had no say about the matter, she would have blamed us for her misery. Instead, she really extended herself to make new friends and be integrated to her new school. She flourished at her new school. When she graduated two years later, she was one of those kids who got the most awards, and she was asked to speak at the graduation.</p>
<p>OP - I am not sure if you have children of your own, but in my experience, when it comes to moving a child to a new school, it can’t be a casual conversation, especially when the child is 15. You need the student’s buy in. It is no different than working with your staff. When you have people’s buy in, even if it is a difficult decision, people will tend to work harder and together. At age 15, your niece needs to have the drive to do well in order to succeed at her new school. You can only inspire and mentor. I would encourage you to have a serious discussion with your niece and your sister. I would let your niece know that it is a privilege for her to go to the Catholic school, and with privilege comes responsibility. We used to tell our kids that - for them to stay at their nice private school, we expected them to work hard and maintain certain GPa, otherwise they could go back to our local public school. We did the same when they went off to college, minimum GPA was required.</p>
<p>Didn’t Aunt Julia say in one of her posts that the niece and her parents are receptive to the idea? </p>
<p>FWIW, the day my son’s progress report came in the mail and it was littered with 70’s, after making the 3 calls to the private schools - I called the high school and told them I needed to pick up kid. He was waiting for me when I pulled up with a questioning look on his face. When he got in the car I said, “wave goodbye to your school.” </p>
<p>Never had one discussion with him before hand about sending him to a private school (since our district is ranked highest in my area and we pay huge property tax to send him there and moved here specifically for the schools!) and we gave him no choice in the matter. I can only imagine what the responses would be if I had asked on CC before making the switch. </p>
<p>We were quite aware that this move could have backfired tremendously but it was a chance we were willing to take. We weren’t even thinking the move would help him get into an elite college - just not have his only option be community college. </p>
<p>Sending him was also a financial sacrifice but the amount of money he got in merit aid from colleges ($30K a yr from some) and the institutional aid (grant not loan) he was given ($40K/yr) from the college he chose to attend (and would never ever ever have gotten into if we kept him at his public school) has dwarfed the amount it cost us to send him to his private school. We “broke even” and them some his 2nd year of college. </p>
<p>If you treat a change of school casually as you propose, you are sending the message that her education is something casual and not important. If you didn’t feel this was very important, it wouldn’t be happening. Trying to avoid a teenage freakout is once again trying to take the easy way out. </p>
<p>I’m still unclear as to why taking on more challenges at the current school is not being explored. You have stated that this is an above average school with good opportunities for students in honors and AP classes. Why is your niece not trying to avail herself of these opportunities? What have her teachers observations been?</p>
<p>ETA-Also, most of the good private schools will want to interview the student before admission to be sure they are on board.</p>
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<p>1.) It’s her life… that she is very much in position to destroy.</p>
<p>2.) She is social at camps, volunteering, etc. where she doesn’t know anyone. She’s not just thriving at her specific school, she’s an outgoing, well-liked girl.</p>
<p>3.) You’re really going to let an incredibly naive and undisciplined 15 y.o. – that without intervention is headed for community college – control her destiny?</p>
<p>The family lives very close to the private, driving by it multiple times per week. It’s an impressive looking school with a strong area reputation. My niece didn’t have a poor reaction when I brought it up and I don’t believe she’s mature enough to have some serious conversation “about her future” over the next two weeks. If that happened, she’s savvy enough to tell the parents everything they want to hear, how she’ll do better, etc. Why? Because the easy route (academically, socially, familiarity, etc.) is to stay in the current school. I believe what @emilybee did is exactly how you approach this. How can you possibly let a 15 y.o. that’s loafing it control decisions that will impact the rest of their life? What result are you expecting? If it was up to her, she’d probably sleep in and watch netflix every day. Yet the family is supposed to give her an opportunity to overthink this or blow it severely out of proportion as we attempt to position her to grow and prosper into a young woman?</p>