<p>Good for you bethievt – isn’t this a great place to vent (and thus save friendships)! </p>
<p>BTW, my husband and I are very impressed by Grinnell. I’m crossing my fingers that mydaughter will get accepted and take a serious look at the place . . .</p>
<p>The two of you have been walking for 8 years right?</p>
<p>So I would think that you would be pretty good friends. </p>
<p>Which leaves me wondering WHY it is so offensive for a friend to honestly tell another friend to shut up. </p>
<p>Well not exactly like that but when my friends say “Can we please talk about something else?!” I usually just laugh and realize how ridiculous I must’ve sounded blabbering on and on. </p>
<p>She probably feels that you’re kicking a dead horse. You say that she often discusses boring topics but at least it’s a multitude of subjects. </p>
<p>Which therefore leads me to this conclusion: you guys don’t seem to share similar interests, neither of you can be honest with each other, and you openly question her social skills…WHY ARE YOU FRIENDS?</p>
<p>Sorry to play devils advicate but this all seems so childish…</p>
<p>bethievt, it’s so hard not to talk about this, it’s what is consuming right now.</p>
<p>Last week, I asked someone a question about schools that her S applied to and that my D might be interested in. She’s not someone that I know particularly well but I enjoy her immensely. To my suprise she asked me to go to lunch with her. We had a great lunch and talked about schools. </p>
<p>I was so happy that she asked me to lunch and I could ask her questions about the college app process. But maybe she wanted someone she could talk about her S’s schools. He’s applying to very selective schools and she probably doesn’t feel comfortable talking to most about his accomplishments.</p>
<p>I’ve learned that I can talk to some people about schools but many of my friends have no interest. It’s also hard when your child is more successful than another and they don’t want to hear about schools their kid can’t get into. One of my good friends S, is going to the local U and that is great with her. She can’t imagine why you would put time and effort into schools that are more than a couple of hours away. To each their own.</p>
<p>bethie, one of my S’s classmates is at Grinnell and his mother says he is loving it. The Sal of his class was heartbroken that the $ didn’t work and she couldn’t attend Grinnell. It’s a great school and poo to your friend.</p>
<p>surfette</p>
<p>You are correct–I was being a bit childish. Sometimes adults are worse about that than kids. But it did help me to vent and now I’m over it.We’re neighbors with sons the same age and a few things in common, but mostly very different people. Still it’s good to have walking partners…and I still have mine.</p>
<p>deb</p>
<p>“Consuming” is a very good word for what this process is; at least for some of us. Lots of kids here also go to the local flag-ship U, a very good school, btw and not cheap, even for in-state. Very few venture to the Midwest, but the bulk of my son’s favorite colleges are there. I should be happy, because it gives him an admissions advantage.</p>
<p>It’s okay. You got over it. Not that childish. It <em>is</em> annoying to be told to shut up. I’ve never liked it, even when I <em>know</em> I should shut up . . .</p>
<p>Thank goodness I have walking partners who can stand to hear me dissect the pros and cons of college issues! Talking it out helps to make clear to me what the issues are and where the solutions lie. Still, I try to let the topics zoom around…I figure I only get a mile of the walk for college issues; the other 3.4 miles are for general interest items 
It’s funny how my “mile” of college stuff has changed over time… there was the months of worrying about not enough EC’s and PSAT scores… the months worrying about lack of ECs and SAT scores… the month worrying about application essays and lack of ECs… the months worrying about admittances and scholarship apps… the months worrying about financial aid applications…and now, the months cheering all the acceptances but worrying about FA packages and THE final decision. Okay, ready for this all to be over, and be discussing only chocolate brownie recipes on my walks!</p>
<p>Bethie, your mentioning the too-fast walker made me realize what the unspoken solution has been with my friends. I have a group of 50-something running buddies, most of us with kids who have gone throught the college admissions process in the past couple of years. We never have to tell each other to change the subject . . . becuase we’re huffing and puffing too hard to talk in complete sentences long before anyone overdoes the talk about colleges. Maybe the solution is to just walk faster ;)</p>
<p>I have proof that Delaware exists, car lic. plates or not. Have you ever noticed that half of all large pleasure craft in Connecticut says Delaware on the stearn? So Delaware must be somewhere in Connecticut.</p>
<p>Man, the dissin’ I have to deal with in this forum . . . (shakes head mournfully)</p>
<p>oh cheer up iderochi, you could be a yankee living in the south like me 
I am considered a damn yankee because I stayed.
At least you live in a state where unwanted visitors can pass through in an hour.</p>
<p>When were you in Lynchburg? That must have been your Delaware plate I saw LOL</p>
<p>Um, I just noticed I’m getting near 1,000 posts. Is that when I morph into a senior member? It would be funny if that happened tomorrow when I turn 55. A doubly senior moment.</p>
<p>Hey Bethie, me too, I will let you know if any magic marmots show up to celebrate with confettie and an CCARP subscription. (oh, hey, me too on the 1000, NOT on the 55 thank you very much!)</p>
<p>Hey lderochi,
I will stand up and attest to the fact that there is a Delaware. I lived there for a year in the mid-80’s. In Greenville, a 'burb of Wilmington. Got the license plates and everything. Eventually, I had to leave. Everyone was too nice. And too slow. I’m a New Yorker. ;)</p>
<p>Thanks momof3. I can assure you that you would have gone mad in Slower Lower Delaware if you thought Wilmington was too slow-paced. But we like it :)</p>
<p>And the thing is, rand, I AM a southerner. I’m still not entirely sure how I got here – though believe me, many in southern Delaware consider themselves “Southern”. My son, a true lover of the southern states, just looks at them incredulously.</p>
<p>Bethievt</p>
<p>Happy Birthday!!! So how long did it take you to get there?
(The thousand posts…I know how long it took to get to 55 )</p>
<p>Iderochi</p>
<p>I love it down here. Being from Connecticut it took me a while to get used to the pace, but for some strange reason I don’t miss I95.</p>
<p>Happy Birthday Bethievt!!!
Happy 1000 posts (soon)!!!</p>
<p>By the way I got admonished last night by my friend’s husband at Shabbat dinner for my college obsession…but I couldn’t help it. They brought along a friend that goes to one of the schools my D was accepted to…how do I not ask questions!!!</p>
<p>Happy Birthday Bethie! Today’s your day! You can talk about college all you want (here that is).</p>
<p>Bethie, Happy Birthday, Yom Holedet Sameach (Hebrew), many HAPPY returns of the day. May you walk and talk til 120. Welcome to the pallindrome (sp?). You’ve read Braun, “Inventing the Rest of our Lives”, surely? If not, a must-read!</p>
<p>We’ve got snow and I hear from my brothers and ma in NH (the upside-down state to your east) that there’s huge snow in New England.</p>
<p>Californians, do think of Bethie as you suck in that 80-degree air today. 80 degrees, grr. Talk about spittin’ tacks…</p>
<p>Delaware, no problem, just distract us all by making fun of NEW JERSEY, which everyone knows exists. I’ll start: “The nicest thing anyone ever says about New Jersey is that parts of it look like another state.” </p>
<p>NONONO. The paragraph above was not nice. Bethie’s the world’s nicest/kindest (as they say in Maine, “finest kind”) so pretend I didn’t say that about NJ. Peh, peh. Don’t talk trash on bethie’s thread, just colleges (THAT we LOVE to do!).</p>
<p>Oh and there’s no use poking fun at Buffalo. We’ve heard it all…(there’s another defensive/protective phrase). Did you know, btw (I didn’t til I moved here) that there weren’t ever Buffalo around here, but it comes from the French “Beau Fleuve” (beautiful river). Remember, we’re near Niagara Falls, and the most French parts of Canada, so the fur traders named it in the 17th or l8th century, i guess. Factoid of the day.</p>
<p>Happy Birthday!!!</p>
<p>I’m one of those people who actually stop in Delaware for vacations. Very nice beaches. :)</p>