As a parent I could care less about the consequences that might result from reporting such outrageous behavior. No teenager should have to put up with someone referring to them in those terms, and the fact that she is a teacher makes it even more unacceptable in my mind. She is in a position of authority and sets an example for these young girls. Get your priorities straight and report her. It is astonishing to me that someone has not already done so.
Do all of the students think this is ok? I think this is an opportunity for a group of them to meet with her and tell her that they think this is inappropriate and disrespectful and they would really like her to stop. If she doesn’t, I think all of the students would be in their rights to choose a somewhat disrespectful nickname for her and start using it. In any case, I think it would be much more effective for this to come from the students. Teacher needs to know that times have changed and that students are sensitive to this (My kid’s classmates would be I know, maybe yours aren’t? If not, that could be a problem in itself.)
This is one of the more bizarre tales I’ve heard here on CC.
If true, yep, immediate action would be taken on my part. In fact, I might even have my DH do it. He would find this even more offensive than I do.
As a former teacher, I just don’t get where she is coming from. I also don’t know how it hasn’t come to a head before now, “good teacher” or no.
If no video, at least an audio recording of this teacher calling the girls sluts would be helpful. I think parents need to step up and / or ALL the kids (not just a few or only the girls). This is wrong on all levels.
Is this a public school teacher w tenure? Good luck…
GMT be aware that not all public school teachers are subject to union rules. Many of us are vulnerable to being fired for making parents mad.
Not that it makes this teacher 's vocabulary acceptable
Does Title IX apply here? A sexually/gender hostile school? Or, is that just for colleges?
HIMom:
I disagree - there is no need to get a group involved. That is wasting time and resources. These kids are busy. This is deplorable behavior and one offended student with audio evidence and her parents should be enough to go to the principal and have it stopped immediately. In fact, a teacher who thinks that name calling is ok is likely to seek retribution against any students who complain. Get your evidence and report to higher authority immediately.
A teacher in my school (admittedly a Catholic high school) would be out of a job after a comment like that.
And if ANYONE, particularly a TEACHER, called one of my daughters a slut, you had better believe I would hit that chain of command so fast that heads would spin.
We are our kids’ only advocates. It’s time to advocate for your daughter and for every single girl in that woman’s classes.
Calling them such names is hurtful. It encourages the same behavior from the guys in the class, since it’s obviously acceptable. I’m not in the class, neither is my daughter. But I’m offended just reading about it. HOW DARE SHE call those kids that name???
My daughter is not a slut. Neither is yours. Speak up–right now, on Saturday morning-- and make your voice heard. This is unacceptable. Stand up for your daughter, and for every other adolescent girl in that class who is being called a hurtful, unnecessary, unwarranted name by someone in power.
I’m embarrassed to share the title of “teacher” with someone who would do that to kids.
Seems like it would be hard to get this on audio because, as the OP stated, it’s not something she says all the time. How could a child predict when this would occur? The child is to be burdened with the job of secretly recording the teacher every minute of every day with some device in order to catch her in the act? It seems like that would be rather stressful for the child. I think the adults should be the ones taking action, not the child.
^^^ I already “liked” post #28 but here’s another “Like”
I wouldn’t get to throw my fit though, as my husband would have pushed himself to the front of that line. I know he would go over the teacher’s head, requesting a joint conference with those higher in the chain of command … definitely the principal but also those over her head, just in case the principal has let other complaints slide. And there have to have been other complaints.
For what it’s worth, some students may not mention it at home knowing that their parents will raise the roof and wanting not to stand out. I don’t think it can be done anonymously but so be it.
I can’t even imagine a school district allowing this. WTH? How far up have you complained?
Could the teacher be trying to shame the students into wearing more modest clothing to school?
There might be some merit to that, but calling them names in public isn’t the way to go about it.
A friend’s daughter was a substitute teacher. She was in her early 20’s, and she used the term “douche bags” in the classroom. She was no longer a substitute soon after.
It’s so interesting to me that you all seem to think this is a parent’s job. The teacher is trying to be cool. The kids like her. She needs to know that “slut shaming” is an issue now and the students (boys and girls) don’t think this is cool. These are HS students, not middle schoolers. First step is for the students to talk to the teacher. If that doesn’t work, then start firing up the helicopter.
There are some battles that are absolutely appropriate for a kid to fight on her own. This is not one of them.
This is a matter of common decency. I don’t care whether or not the kids “think it’s cool” and are willing to tolerate it. It’s not cool. It’s not professional. It’s not the behavior I would expect or tolerate from an adult employed by the school, or any adult anywhere. If my son DARED use that type of language on any female anywhere anytime, let’s just say it wouldn’t go well for him.
Kids are fine fighting their own battles on things like grades. This behavior is another class entirely. This one calls for adult intervention. Whether the kids think it’s wrong or not is totally immaterial. Every single time this woman, who is in a position of power in that room, uses that word, she makes it a little more OK to use. It needs to be stopped now, before any further damage can be done.
And any teacher who thinks that dropping to this level in order to have the kids like her knows absolutely nothing about teaching. It’s not about being one of the kids, particularly one of the kids at their worst. You don’t relate to your students by insulting one half to get in with the other half.
If that makes me a helicopter mom, then by all means, fire it up.
I guess I missed where the OP said this was high school. I was thinking middle school or younger, don’t know why.
I’m a big believer that once a student reached HS, s/he should be responsible for leading the charge on his/her own destiny (with the parent(s)’ support), but this is one of those cases where I would let the tiger parent out of the cage.
From my grandson’s Handbook For Students and Parents 2015-2016:
“It is the student’s right to be respected as an individual. It is the student’s right to dress in such a way as to express one’s personality.”
“It is the student’s right to be protected from intimidation, harassment, or discrimination based on…sex, gender/gender identity, sexual orientation, or disability, BY EMPLOYEES OR STUDENTS ON SCHOOL PROPERTY…”
“It is the student’s responsibility to report, and encourage others to report, any incidents of intimidation, harassment or discrimination.”
“All staff will maintain a climate of mutual respect…Professional demeanor will be demonstrated by the use of APPROPRIATE LANGUAGE at all times.”
I would look through your daughter’s handbook or go on the school website to determine what course of action is recommended. As a wise old supervisor once told me, if it bothered you enough to come and see me, then it won’t be taken lightly.
I agree with @Nrdsb4 — it sounds like this isn’t a regular occurrence, so getting a video or audio recording would be too difficult. Besides the OP said her D doesn’t think it’s a big deal ("My child is acting like it’s no big deal. "), so I doubt the D would agree to do it anyway.