This article reminded me of this thread. I remember my dorm days - we brought our bedding and personal items (mine fit in a VW Bug) and we shopped with our roommates for the rest. I remember the orange and yellow shag carpet and the cinder block shelves we bought. No parents involved. I was much more involved with my 2010 and 2012 grads, but I think I respected their desires, I hope so. It was done out of love, but maybe kids should do more themselves. For the short time in the dorms, they really donât need much. I live in a college town and the stuff that gets left behind, on the curbs, and at the thrift stores at the end of the year is astounding.
My daughter lived in dorms for 2 years. After that, she moved into the house that older teammates had rented the year before, and forever after that 1-3 would move out and then more players would move in. This went on for at least 5 years that I know of. They all just sold the beds and furniture to the next set of players. It was a regular 3 bedroom house, pretty nice, and their back fence abutted the campus so close.
Some parent had to be responsible for collecting the money and paying the bills as the landlord would only take one check and the responsible parent also did the utilities. My daughter paid that parent every month. I was not involved at all.
Two other players had parents who bought houses and rented them to the girls. I totally wasnât involved in that drama, and there was drama. My daughter was a very popular roommate as she is a minimalist so had no junk and she likes to bake.
My younger daughterâs state U has a great program through the local Y where the Y puts PODS around the campus dorms and at some of the surrounding off campus apts. at the end of each year, where students can put furniture (desks, tables, chairs), rugs, storage cubes, microwaves, etc. that they donât want (they donât take soft items like couches or mattresses). The Y collects everything and has a big sale at the beginning of each school year. This is a great idea that more colleges should do.
Reading some of the comments above brings up a worry I would have if my kid were at the lower end of an income pool while attending a wealthy college. Not that I wouldnât allow it, but I would have to have a very frank conversation with my kid about budget and issues that might arise during the 4 years with friends who have bigger budgets (like dorm decorating, off campus housing and travel during college breaks).
Fancy off campus housing at many colleges and universities is off the charts. They know they have a captive audience and there is often a big difference between the fancy places with hardwood floors, granite countertops and zero-entry pools and the older budget places with shag carpet, mold and chipping paint. My D lived in a fancy place sophomore year and an old, budget place senior year (there was no mold, thankfully). The fancy place had so many hoops to jump through and rules. The budget place was very laid back - she just packed up, turned in her key and left after she graduated. No need to do a deep clean or have an inspection in order to get our security deposit back.
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Remember when we all had to worry if weâd be prosecuted for stealing milk crates?
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This thread totally had be thinking about my college milk crate storage and my makeshift brick and wood plank bookshelves.
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Haha - I do remember.
There was a mix up for my daughterâs freshman year, and she was originally going to live in a suite with 3 other teammates but the coach asked her to move to live with another player; coach failed to follow up and daughter ended up with the OG group). So all summer these kids planned who would bring what, from rugs to shelving to paper towels. My daughter arrived, expecting to live somewhere else, but was assigned to this suite (and she also got the best room as those were assigned to). Her big contribution? A blender. She had her personal stuff and that was it.
And you know what? It was FINE. Sheâs a minimalist and didnât care about twinkle lights and a round chair or even a toaster. The other stuff was just stuff. The other parents were having a blast building shelving and stacking toilet paper and soap, and we just didnât care. And still my daughter was asked by every one of these roommates to be a roommate the following year (she picked other athletes to live with).
And yes, we were the lower budget family. It was a splurge to let her live in these freshman suites as it was more expensive than other dorm option. They all had a meal plan that included a pizza place and deli for take out (and could even order it to be delivered) so they could âliveâ off their meal plans without going out to fancy restaurants.
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Yes the amount of stuff that gets left behind or thrown away is astounding! Talk about waste! I am also amazed at the amount of kids who get all new bedding and dorm furniture every year. My kids didnât get new stuff every year. D lived in a dorm freshman year and then sophomore year she lived on campus in an on campus apartment, but it was furnished and the beds were still the extra long twin bed and did provide kitchen stuff but it was mostly stuff we had. Junior year she studied abroad and senior year she lived in an off campus apartment that did have a larger bed and we bought new bedding for that, but the apartment was furnished which was nice. We are going through the same thing with S and he is pretty minimalistic so thatâs nice. But he does know some people who went furniture shopping for their kids and brought nice brand new furniture for an off campus apartment. If they have the money, I say go for it, but at the same time it does seem kind of unnecessary and excessive for college.
I donât think you need to spend a ton on furniture for dorms and college apartments, in a lot of cases the kids arenât in the same place for more than 1 school year (maybe 2 at the most) and Iâve noticed not every kid takes great care of their stuff.
As for living off campus, our kids could do that, but the cost needed to be the same or less than living on campus. Iâm not going to pay a lot more money to live in a fancy off campus place when there are cheaper options on campus or cheaper off campus options.
I grew up in a college town.
I remember the year they invented the George Forman grill. My mom had it on her wish list for her birthday- we all thought it was dumb so nobody bought it for her. And then on move-out day- âhappy belated birthday, mom!â. Everyone had found a grill on the streetâŠ.
Same with Mr. Coffee. That was before you could buy kitchen appliances at CVS for $10. We were perpetually astonished that someone would pay $50 or $60 for an appliance in September and leave it on the curb in May.
And Iâm sure many of you remember helping a sibling lug home a recliner only to have your parents yell ânot in my houseâ. Upholstered furniture from the dorms and frat houses was a no-no⊠eeew. Now I canât believe we even wanted it for our ârec roomâ (the unfurnished basement next to the washing machine with a ping pong table and old rug!
In many cases, this is about the parents. Theyâve been as involved as they can be with their kids to date, and this feels like a way to cushion the departure. I too tried in my way to make sure DSâ âlandingâ at school was as smooth as possible. The idea of him not having a comfortable bed or a,warm coat or whatever was distressing to me. To him, all a non-event.
We really wanted our daughter to live in a nicer place than her roommate could afford and offered to pay the differential for her friend who she wanted to live with. My own family had experienced financial difficulties and my brotherâs best friend who was his roomate paid for their apartment in full their entire senior year (they are very very wealthy and he is my brotherâs best friend to his day and even richer than ever), so this would have just been paying it forward. However, my daughter did not want to even suggest this to her friend. We were not happy because frankly the set up of the building was not great and there were break ins on her block. Our one absolute was that we would not let her use the basement (UNLOCKED WITH STREET ACCESS!) laundry. We paid for laundry service and did the âpremiumâ service which allowed two bags per week. She told the roommate her parents âmessed upâ by getting her that and the roomate should use one bag as that was all daughter needed. We did it deliberately for this purpose.
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Many schools allow student to donate unwanted dorm items so incoming students (or returning students, I suppose) can pick up gently used things for themselves, either for free or at garage-sale-level cheap prices. My Dâs school does this. At least free-cycling combats the problems of waste and expense.
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Sounds a lot like Allston Christmas.
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My kidâs school did this too. A whole âmarketâ in the gym.
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Both of my kiddos are living in houses this year - I provided new bedding, as their new beds are not twin size, and a couple of posters and that is it. One son got a desk from a kid who was getting rid of it and the other son bought a dresser at Goodwill. The. houses themselves are down at the heels but really well located to each campus and the price was right. No way was I springing for granite counters, stainless steel etc. Nor would it cross my mind to buy them new furnishings/appliances/dishwear etc. They were welcome to take anything extra from home (had put aside some pots/pans/dishes when we got new ones) but they both said the houses were pretty well stocked. They will look for anything else they need/want on Facebook marketplace. My kids donât need to have the same standard of living that we have - living modestly as a student didnât hurt me and it certainly wonât hurt them.
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At the end of the school year, Univ of Arizona gathers up a bunch of âgently usedâ dorm items left behind by students and they sell it in their surplus store. Usually about a week or 2 before the fall semester starts, they have a big surplus store sale. And thereâs boatloads of dorm fridges, those 3-drawer plastic dresser thingies that you can find at Walmart & Target everywhere, and a bunch of other similar items.
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For those of you who went to school in Boston, yesterday was Allston Chritmas. A little snafu my husband forgot to factor in on his way to Fenway for an early game. I think they should run a repeat of this every year as a celebratory warning.
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The university near me has tried all kinds of ways to encourage reuse and recycling, but nothing has really worked except providing mini-fridge rental and not allowing students to bring their own. With around 6,000 freshmen moving into dorms each year, most arrive with brand-new shower caddies, twin XL mattress pads, bedding sets, and plastic storage bins. By sophomore year, when most move off campus, those items are no longer needed.
Parents and students tend to shop ahead and prefer buying everything new, so there isnât much of a market for secondhand dorm essentials. The cycle just keeps repeating.
I was at Target today and it looked like the early COVID days. Some aisles were completely emptied of move-in necessities. Other shelves were packed with unsold items now on clearance as the store tries to clear out the excess.
It feels like such a waste. I did the whole dorm-nesting thing for my own students, so I understand the excitement and that itâs done out of love. But I canât help wishing we could go back to the 70s and 80s, before college move-in became another big-box retail season of overconsumption. Our planet would be better for it.
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My Dâs universityâs Y-Toss event, that I mentioned above, is wildly popular and they sell out of many of the used items. Families often come a day early to move in so they can get the best selection. It works really well, and Iâm shocked more college campuses donât do something similar. Her college campus is large with +/- 7,000 new freshman each year. They donât accept bedding or the mattress toppers, understandably.
When my D moved into her senior year apt. she (and her roommates) all just purchased the furniture that was already there and brought their own bedding, toppers, pillows, etc. When they moved out, they sold everything to the new girls moving in. It was nice not to have to move any furniture or figure out what to do with it.
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Yep! It really is overconsumption. For my kids they only got new bedding if they had a difference size bed in their dorm or apartment. As for other stuff, we bought what they needed or brought it from home (if it was something we had at home). At both their schools they did have a donation thing where you can drop off items that arenât needed. The only thing that I let my kids know is that for some dorm/apartment stuff, Iâm not going to keep buying them the same thing year after year if they keep throwing it away or donating it.
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