<p>Here’s the situation. My D is a junior and a very good student with great stats. She qualifies for a full-tuition scholarship at an OOS flagship. This leaves our family on the hook for room and board. (She may also get some other $ as well). Our family will not be eligible for any need aid.</p>
<p>She is going to apply to a bunch of privates. I’m sure she will receive merit aid at many of these schools. How much aid is anyone’s guess.</p>
<p>So, the question we have is this. Since we know we can send her to a good school with a nice honors college for about $13K/year. How much more $ should we be willing to kick in for a private school?</p>
<p>Does it depend on the quality of the school? Should we have a $ figure in mind and stand by it no matter what? Is $20K a reasonable amount?</p>
<p>Keep in mind she is definetly going to grad school. Also, she attends a Catholic school, so we are already spending about $13K/year for HS.</p>
<p>What is reasonable depends on your family finances.</p>
<p>But don’t promise more than what you can deliver. Let her know the cost limit up front so that she knows that at more expensive schools, she is aiming for financial aid and scholarships, not merely admission.</p>
<p>If she chooses something less expensive than your limit, do you plan to offer the unused amount to her post-graduate professional school costs?</p>
<p>She’s a junior? Are you “expecting” these offers or does she, somehow, have the offers already? Having good enough stats to “qualify” is not the same thing as having it “offered”.</p>
<p>I’m sorry I failed to mention this in my original post. We’ve done a pretty good job of saving for college. We can easily afford $30K/yr just from savings. Plus, we can afford to add the $13K/yr we are already spending. So, theoretically, we could give her $43K/yr without stretching. And, yes we will continue to support our kids through grad school.</p>
<p>My question was really more about WHAT we should do. I don’t want to over indulge my D. In the real world, she should jump on the OOS flagship. But…this is her college experience and we want her to love her school…within reason!! So, whaddya think?</p>
<p>I feel pretty comfortable that she will receive some merit offers based on her stats and the schools she’s looking at. Of course there are no guarantees with most privates. As far as the OOS flagship, it’s an automatic scholarship based on her stats.</p>
<p>I think it’s weird to view college as an indulgence. Sure, if the additional money is going to buy swanky housing or a concierge service, but not if it’s buying a better student:faculty ratio or better facilities (like labs, library, IT services, etc. that can have a real impact the on quality of the education she receives). I would not assume that your daughter’s degree of love for various schools will correlate with their price tags. So…buy her the best education that you can afford.</p>
<p>She is equivocal about the OOS flagship. We have an honors college visit set up for late May. Her dream and goal is to study at a small LAC, so the flagship is obviously MUCH bigger.</p>
<p>I will say that she’s a very practical young lady and is also well adjusted so she will thrive anywhere.</p>
<p>I was just hoping for opinions/thoughts on how much more if any is a reasonable amount of money above and beyond the $13K for another school…</p>
<p>I really don’t think this is a question anyone here can answer because what is reasonable for me may not be reasonable for you, and what is overindulgent to you may not be overindulgent to me.</p>
<p>I think you should play out some scenarios. What if she gets in to a dreamy private school that she absolutely falls in love with, but they give her no financial aid or merit. Will you flat out say “no”? Will you take out loans? Will you fund it but say “no” to grad school?</p>
<p>By the way, I don’t know what kind of grad program your daughter is aiming towards, but some of them cost a lot of money and others cost none and they even pay a stipend through teaching and research assistantships (for example, many PhD programs).</p>
<p>I think you are smart to have a number and talk to your DD about it. We did that exact same thing a year ago today. We showed her the college fund and told her that if she got scholarships etc and didn’t use it all - it would be her gift WHEN she graduates. It really gave her a good sense of the cost vs the pay out. We were very proud of how she handled it. Now - what that number is - is up to you. Personally, I think $20K is a bit low if you can go to $43K without stretching but I understand you wanting her to understand the money. Grad school is expensive!!!</p>
<p>On the face of it, $20K/year (out-the-door cost, including tuition, R&B, books, travel, etc.) is reasonable. In fact, that’s the figure I was shooting for when D2 was college searching in 2009. Got an offer actually a tad less than that, but she ended up deciding on a school that was a few thousand more a year. We paid it & never looked back.</p>
<p>And to a certain extent, as MirabileDictu says, you should buy her the best education you can afford. But…you have the luxury of time & money that you don’t have to scramble now. Do your due diligence. Get out there with her and visit multiple schools—big, small, medium, cheap, expensive. From that you can determine value, and so will your D.</p>
<p>I almost was going to say that no parent in their right mind should pay over $30K/year for an undergrad education, but I can’t bring myself to say that, because there ALWAYS are extenuating circumstances that could justify a higher cost. Bottom line is to shop & compare. It’s a buyer’s market, and there a lot of good schools out there.</p>
<p>I realize no one can really answer this question for us. I was sorta just looking for thoughts. I want to use this opportunity to teach my D that money doesn’t grow on trees. There will be no incentive to give the large flagship a real chance if she knows we’ll pay any amount for college.</p>
<p>I realize that grad school can be expensive. She will be seeking a PhD so hopefully she’ll get some assistance. But first things first!</p>
<p>I agree with the advice to have a serious talk with her about finances, and that it makes sense to set a ceiling on college expenses. However, don’t set some arbitrary number as the ceiling. It should be based on what you value in a college education, and on the financial impact on your household. Think about how you would decide the maximum amount you’d spend on a house, or a car. What would be the rationale you’d use to set that maximum?</p>
<p>I’m in a similar situation. My D is a junior, will graduate with IB diploma, 2100+ on first SAT sitting with no prep, 4.5 W GPA. We’re looking at highly-rated LACs where I don’t expect much at all in terms of need or merit aid. Is $50k+ /year worth that much more than our flagship in College Park at $20k /year? She intends to major in English/history/drama, so grad school is a given. Luckily, she’s a practical kid, and has acknowledged that MD will suit her perfectly fine if she doesn’t fall in love with one of the privates, which she hasn’t as of yet. For the OP, I’m wondering if you wouldn’t mind sharing the OOS school that you’re referring to? I didn’t know that there were schools that guaranteed full-tuition scholarships based on stats alone. Is the criteria SAT-based (2300+)?</p>
<p>We told our kids what we could afford to pay per year. They did a college search and applied to schools of their choice, with the understanding that they needed to get merit/financial aid that brought the total cost to our “target.” Even though they both qualified for full tuition scholarships at several of our denominational schools, we let them pick. D’s school came in right at our target amount, S’s school is about $10,000 less. They are both happy and we (the parents) are not in the poor house.</p>
<p>I am in the junior boat too. I see where you are coming from and actually agree with you on the limit (although I may have doubled the $13K for my own peace of mind). I also venture to say that if you had kept the $20K card close to your chest, and just said full tuition scholarship to OOS flagship vs a private, the feedback may have gone a whole different direction. Just because you have it doesn’t mean you should have to spend it. Isn’t that how you got the $$ plus-up in the beginning? But there has to be a better reason, and IMHO a darn good one than to say “well I have it, here you go”. Weigh the pros and cons. There are a lot of flagships that are just as good as privates and some better depending on the major. We all know that…right? And I learned this from CC! One can only wish to have a full tuition scholarship waiting in the winds! Wonderful!</p>
<p>For a private LAC, I don’t know if she will get much merit-based aid unless she is significantly higher-statted than most of their students, which might suggest that the school is somewhat below her level (or at least the average student is).</p>
<p>I’d recommend doing what my father and I did for my college search: after I picked the 11 schools I applied to, we set three numbers for each one for what we’d be willing to pay – one number that my parents would be willing to pay, one number for the money that I’d be willing to pay in addition to that, and the total. The numbers varied by school; for instance, MIT was about $30,000 (total) based on the prestige of the school and (more importantly) how much I liked it. My parents said about $20,000 from them and I said I’d take on $10,000 (in cash/loans/scholarships) for the cost. Then, when the actual cost came in lower, we all could agree it was a reasonable number.</p>
<p>This method is great because it factors in what my parents were willing to pay (so they have their say) and what I was willing to take on, either in cash in potential debt. It ended up being really effective for us, since there were a couple safeties that I had no interest in where the number came to about $0 (since I wouldn’t go there unless I had a full ride), while other schools that were top choices came up to $30k (MIT was the highest).</p>
<p>This all is based on my experience, which was primarily dealing with need-based aid except for my safeties. But I think it would apply to anyone if they adapted it slightly.</p>
<p>There is a thread on here somewhere with great info about schools which offer automatic scholarships based on GPA and ACT or SAT scores. In our particular case I’m referring to the University of Alabama.</p>
<p>To the OP: you might also want to try the net price calculators on various colleges to see what net price they would give from need-based financial aid. That way you can know whether the price limit you set will require her to get merit scholarships, or if schools with decent need-based financial aid will also work.</p>