<p>why is it so hard for you to back down and admit that you are wrong?</p>
<p>I think insomniatic has been doing the smart thing. Save and don’t buy what you don’t need. Too many people spend money they don’t even have on things they don’t even need to impress people they don’t even like.</p>
<p>well I admit I remembered some of her posts and I wonder if fear hasn’t convinced her that she is doing what she wants.
In other threads insomniatic has written about wanting to travel, but mother won’t allow, even as a junior in college, is still living at home and hasn’t left town in 2&1/2 years.
That to me is sad, sadder than going to your 1st choice school and having to take out a loan of $5,000 a year to do so.</p>
<p>Disclaimer first–I haven’t read all the latest posts when it looked like the thread was deteriorating into a mild form of mudslinging (I’ve seen worse, but the posts were coming fast and furious- too fast to keep up with.) And I have seen other young adults come onto the parents cafe to post an opinion. Many do so in an offensive way, like the poster who came on to tell parents that we were all helicopter parents and should stay out of their kids college application process :eek: This OP didn’t initially come her with an attitude, but with a commentary about the spending habits of many - kids and adults alike.</p>
<p>The OP here came on, IMO, initially without an attack, without being confrontational, to post an observation… an opinion. If all posters were required to have personal experience with everything they post an opinion about, cc would be awfully quiet. Why does the OP have to have paid all his/her bills in order to render an opinion about the overspending that goes on with many people? Did he/she touch a nerve? Perhaps I am coming to his/her defense because I agree with him/her. Way too many people spend beyond their means. Perhaps I am coming to his/her defense because I am tired of relatives who are reckless with their money turn to us to give them a handout. Perhaps I am coming to the OP’s defense because just the other night we were out with a friend who is an accountant specializing in medical practices and small to mid-sized businesses, who commented how outraged he was that so many of his clients make a ton of money and have nothing in savings. He was appalled. I was appalled. Why aren’t others appalled? Sure there are many circumstances that affect one’s cashflow. That isn’t the point of this thread. The point of this thread, IMO, is that if people are careful with their money and put some in savings for a rainy day, they are better prepared to handle the rainy days as they come along. </p>
<p>Come on - lighten up on the OP. S/He’s been pushed up against the ropes so has become defensive. What s/he is saying is reasonable. People should do their best to cover their costs but balance their budget. His/her advise is reasonable advice, and to me, the fact that s/he thinks this way without having to handle his/her own bills speaks to maturity, not the opposite. My younger s, at 18, still seems to think money falls from trees. He hasn’t learned the value of a dollar.The OP has. His/her parents should be proud, as should s/he.</p>
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<p>I am a male, sorry for not stating that sooner.</p>
<p>Thank you jym626. You couldn’t have stated it any better.</p>
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<p>I am not wrong. I was just stating my opinions.</p>
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<p>Exactly. I am glad somebody else understands.</p>
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<p>I don’t have stats. I was just stating my observations and opinions. And no, I am not 13 years old.</p>
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<p>I never came on here to teach or give advice to anybody. I was merely stating my opinions and observations.</p>
<p>If you don’t want to read it, then don’t read it. It is as easy as that.</p>
<p>I am still surprised, as I go back and scan through the posts, at some of the reactions, and at times overreactions here. I think there is a big differencce between the people who truly try to manage their finances as best they can, are careful bargain hunters who work long hours and take care of their families. And there are people who have fallen on hard times and find themselves in new, challenging circumstances. But there are also those who just “gotta have” the latest and greatest electronic toy, the most stylish outfit, who wouldn’t dare let their kids wear hand me downs, and they are happy to let other people finance their lifestyle. I have relatives like this. Frequently mooching off of others and looking for others to pay to subsidize their lifestyle. Makes me ill, and I won’t enable this behavior. If either of my kids grow up with this mentality, I don’t know how I’ll handle it. To me, these are the people that the OP was talking to. Not the hard working Joe’s who are doing the best they can in this tough economic climate and also want to have some fun and relaxation. They deserve to have some fun. They earned it. (emphasis on the word <em>earn</em>).</p>
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<p>Exactly. Those are the people who I was referring to.</p>
<p>Is there an echo in here ? 
Insomniatic, you can use the ^^^^ to reference the post just above yours, or reference a post by number rather than to quote the entire content of previous posts. Just a suggestion…</p>
<p>I know, but some people complained that the posts were hard to understand when I didn’t use the quote function.</p>
<p>insomniatic–that was me :o</p>
<p>You were using quotation marks rather than the quote box and it was hard to tell what you were quoting vs. what you were responding to. You might consider just quoting (with the quote box) the salient portion of the post to which you are responding.</p>
<p>Insomniac, you sound just like my smart and frugal brother. He is currently working on a project far from home with big spender types, and he feels so isolated. He listens to people talk about having 5 tvs, and he just mentally shakes his head. He dismisses them as ‘consumers’. It’s miserable to work so closely with people who have such different values. His tv is in the basement, turned to the wall, and it was just so positioned all the time his daughters were growing up. Obviously, they did a lot of other things instead of watching tv, as he made it a hassle. They really wanted to see the show if they made the trip down to the basement! </p>
<p>He’s divorced, and when he heard that some guys spend $100+ on a date, he again shook his head. Not him. He can’t imagine trying to impress some girl with his money. That wouldn’t be the type of girl he would be interested in, either. (Yes, I know it is ‘woman’, not ‘girl’, thank you very much) </p>
<p>Yours is a good lifestyle, and sure cuts down on the anxiety. Way to go!</p>
<p>Juststoppingby,
In some cities, it doesn’t take much to end up spending close to $100 on a date. Here, even an average restaurant can charge, say $6-8 for a salad and $ 15-20 for a main course. Even skipping a dessert, add a glass of wine or a cocktail- that might be might be $7- $10. If they go to a move thats another $7 each. And depending on where you go, you might get stuck having to pay for parking. Even staying on the low end, the poor person paying the bill is at $70 already. I am definitely a frugal person, as I described above, but if I went on a first date with someone who just wanted to window shop and grab a burger at McDonalds, there might not be a second date :)</p>
<p>well, it’s good to learn that successful first dates have something to do with impressing other people with flagrant displays of generosity or “hey, baby, wanna see my wide-screen t.v.” might become a less effective courtship strategy,…</p>
<p>While we have been very frugal in our day to day spending habits we have just retired and moving to warmer climes of Tennessee. It is amazing how much “stuff” we have accumulated over the past 30+ years which will either be sold, given away or go in the dumpster.</p>
<p>LOL roro. But this divorcee doesn’t watch tv. The old analog with rabbit ears is facing the basement wall. So it might be “hey baby, wanna see my coupon collection”.</p>
<p>Apologies to “just stoppingby”. We are just kidding around. But there are some circumstances where the first impression we leave with someone should not be that we are cheap. My s and I were chatting about where and when using a coupon is appropriate. We are big coupon, half price, buy one get one free people, but on a first date, I wouldnt recommend he pull out a coupon book. JMO. You can have a nice time and leave a good impression without being flashy at one end, or cheap at the other.</p>