<p>D was driving to school. She pulls up to park and a teacher pulls up next to her and yells at her to see her at breaktime. Well, D had noticed that someone was following her to school. About 10 minutes before, D was a in intersection and proceeded through it after the people took their turns. This one driver stared at her, like D had taken the other drivers “turn”…she then noticed the car was behind…(at the time she didn;t connect up it was the teacher). She remembers the incident because it was a confusing time at the intersection- you know when people can’t decide whether to go or not and she did notice the car following behind her, (because they were driving very close) after she was driving a few blocks. The car made her very nervous.</p>
<p>the teacher followed her to school, pulled up next to her (and the teachers do park somewhere else) and yelled at D to see her at recess. D was relieved to see the person following her was her teacher, but was shocked at getting yelled at.</p>
<p>D called me crying. I said to find her GC and tell her what happened before she has to meet with teacher.</p>
<p>Now, I am nuts or is this really creepy that a teacher would follow a student for “taking her turn”- which D did not, but even if she did, is this normal</p>
<p>there have been two road rage killings here in the past week or so </p>
<p>What would YOU think if someone followed you and yelled at you> Does it make a difference if it was a female or male teacher? If this was your child’s teacher, would you be concerned about them being in that class? </p>
<p>And how does something that happened out of school time and out of school property, why is that to be “resolved” on school property and school time?</p>
<p>The only justification for this, in my mind, would be if the teacher felt that the student had been driving in an unsafe manner and wanted to warn them for the future. However, the “yelling” would be completely unnecessary. A friendly, “Hey, don’t forget the rules at the 4-way-stop” or whatever happened would be sufficient.</p>
<p>Yes, I think this is weird. Yes, I think your daughter reporting it to Guidance was probably a good move. I’d have to hear more about what happened afterward (what the teacher said at break, his/her tone, etc) before judging whether you as a parent need to get involved.</p>
<p>Wait a minute- The girl hasn’t even MET with the teacher yet, so we have no idea what the conversation is really going to be about. The “yelling” was to ask the girl to come see her. Let’s have more information.</p>
<p>The teacher followed my D, and I mean CLOSE, after the intersection, and yelled at my D, who said, I thought it was my turn because the teacher said something to D about her driving…and my D said the teacher was very angry…I believe my D on this and even IF she “took the teacher’s turn” does that even jusitfy a meeting on school time? I think not </p>
<p>and with road rage escalating in our area lately, this was pretty scary for my D</p>
<p>If an adult did this to you, even asked for a “meeting” would it be acceptable? Would an adult follwoing another adult after a percieved slight on the road be acceptable? Why does the teacher even have the right to call my D in for a meeting for this?</p>
<p>It was a four way stop…my D stopped…she broke no laws…and momofwildchiold, under what justification would a teacher have the right call in a student like that?</p>
<p>What if this happened AFTER school? Like driving to the mall? Does the teacher have any rights to call my D in during school?</p>
<p>This was blocks from school, before school, etc…and D did not break any laws, but the teacher followed her, yelled at her and demanded a meeting</p>
<p>What possible justification would she have for demanding a meeting? And D said it was very clear it what it was about.</p>
<p>And the yelling was in anger, not to just be heard. My D is smart enough to know the difference</p>
<p>What did guidance say? Did your D meet with the teacher?</p>
<p>I’m still leaning on the inappropriate/creepy side, especially if your D felt she was being “tailgated” after the intersection. But I’m curious to hear how the rest of the day went.</p>
<p>I would love to hear the follow up. It seems as if the teacher is angry about the driving incident and it so happens that both of them “attend” the same school and so the teacher knows your daughter, and yet is not on equal footing with your daughter at school, but is a person of authority. Had the teacher been upset at the driving under normal circumstances, she would not know your daughter and would not have the upper hand necessarily like she does as a teacher at D’s school. I’m not sure what this has to do with school or why your D should have to meet with her about this matter (assuming it is about this matter which it does appear to be from your description). But your D would feel compelled to meet because the teacher is a person of authority at her school. I think it is indeed a good idea to talk to the GC first and perhaps even ask her GC (if they have a good relationship) to attend the meeting as a third party who is impartial, as a witness. Also, your D may feel more supported by the GC’s presence. When my D felt under attack by a teacher at her school unfairly, she went to the GC who attended the meeting as a third party. I hope your D can have that happen as well.</p>
<p>I will…and whatever happens, I am going to share this with the GC, as it needs to be in someones radar somehwere at the school, because this maynot be a one-off incident</p>
<p>I don’t know if the GC was at the meeting but my D did talk to GC before hand, that was the plan anyway</p>
<p>Absolutely nothing. All kinds of people go on power trips, including teachers (and GCs and Principals). Unless it will affect your D’s grades (or recs or anything of real importance), I would just move on.</p>
<p>Northstarmom, while typically, I would have the D talk to the teacher first before going to a GC, I think differently in this case because already the teacher did talk to the D a little bit and she already indicated angrily that it was about the driving incident. So, while it remains to be seen what the teacher is going to say, the situation and her anger over it has already occurred enough so that the D may wish to have a third party sit in or at least be aware of her fears about this situation with her teacher and the GC is also someone to “listen” and support. Going to the counselor is not the same as the D going to the principal before first meeting with the teacher. The GC is there for students who need help and support and guidance and is not the same as going to a “higher up” which would not be right to do before meeting FIRST with the teacher. </p>
<p>Besides all that, I still don’t know why the driving issue is the purview of this teacher on school grounds. I feel she has the upper hand by virtue of her position that she may not have had had she been irked over the taking of turns at an intersection with a stranger.</p>
<p>I’m probably too late on this, but I think having your D talk to the GC is a good idea, then I’d tell her NOT to meet the teacher. Too scary and inappropriate, no laws were broken and the incident did not occur on school grounds.</p>
<p>Bay, while I also can’t imagine why this student must meet with the teacher about something that was not at school, I don’t know how she can skip the meeting. If I read the post correctly, this teacher is D’s teacher, not just any teacher at the school. It may cause her a problem to skip a meeting the teacher demanded of her (even if we think the teacher should not be meeting about this in the first place).</p>
<p>I agree that you need more info. Why would your daughter be crying if all a teacher did was “yell” across from one car to another, presumably on a busy street, a request to see her at break? Don’t go too ballistic on the teacher until you know all the facts. For all you know, he/she may have been acting in your child’s interest and functioning as a good citizen- perhaps part of the optimal “village” it takes to raise a child.</p>
<p>It sounds like you may not have teenage daughters. I have two, and I’m pretty sure both of them would be very shook up if a teacher “yelled” at them for no justifiable reason.</p>
<p>"Northstarmom, while typically, I would have the D talk to the teacher first before going to a GC, I think differently in this case because already the teacher did talk to the D a little bit and she already indicated angrily that it was about the driving incident. "</p>
<p>I’d still want my kid to talk to the teacher first. Perhaps the teacher yelled because the student did something dangerous while driving that the student isn’t aware of doing.</p>
<p>I’ve yelled at kids and teens whom I’ve seen doing something dangerous that the may not have known was dangerous. For instance, once I yelled at some kid whom I saw who was using a long stick to try to hit a power line. I alarmed – concerned that the kid would electrocute himself, but he may have thought I was yelling to be mean.</p>
<p>If it ends up that the teacher yelled for no good reason, then I think the principal, not the GC would need to be told.</p>