Oh I def want the dog! 
I intend to really focus on this after we have a short vacation with the kids later this month (which H has not fully committed to going on…) . He was really devastated when our dog passed. We have a grandpup now and he enjoys her but is constantly comparing her to our dog.
The things I think I can maybe have some success with introducing:
Good @abasket. It’s a start. Small steps. May I suggest not just a computer class on general stuff unless he really needs that. If he is doing eBay he knows the basics. How about an excel class or a quick books class. Something to help his business. Maybe an marketing class. During the pandemic we are doing a Facebook /Instagram online classes (some are just free and some you pay for the package). This can help build his business. May I ask if you can share what he sells? This can help branch to other things he can do.
@Knowsstuff he limps through to get what he needs done. I think a level above “beginner class” could build his confidence. But your idea is good as well.
What doesn’t he sell? 
It started out as a way to start getting rid of stuff (collectibles) in our house. He had such good results that he now goes to estate sales/garage sales and picks up stuff to resell -and we have 10x more stuff in our house than ever… 
My mom and dad have hit yard sales together for years looking for items to re-sell. My dad bought a handmade rustic Bowie knife at a yard sale for $100 several years ago. After some research he sold it at auction for $11,000.
Haha. Him and my wife would get along just fine… Lol.
OK, so he is doing stuff. Just not occupying his full day while your working and have a full agenda. So… Your my wife also… Lol…
I would support what he is doing but find ways to get the stuff out the house. Also maybe him taking a refinishing class for his treasures. Just to get it to look good. Furniture pencils, etc to get more value and keep him busy.
Plus things like Old English and the like (there are furniture systems like at the big box stores to keep him busy.).
Also one version of quick books or the like has an inventory maker thing. Or again Excell etc. Have him keep an inventory list (will keep him busy for a bit). So he knows what he has and what he needs to get.
I agree (not that it matters) but getting him proficient on the computer will help his confidence to go further with it.
If you feel it’s more of a problem then get him a physical and speak to his doctor behind his back with your concerns. Women go through menopause and some guys go through similar things. Low blood sugar can cause many things.
Also I got involved with our synagogue to the point we remade a men’s club. Then I became the president and now on the board for 10 years. We do monthly, mostly social things like beer tasting, wine and scotch tasting (heh, it’s fun). Have lectures and book reviews with the author talking about the book etc etc. There are some more religious things and some social justice stuff. Just some ideas…
One other thing and I’ll tread lightly ?.
Are there chores that your husband has taken over since he is retired and you are not?
When my dad retired early, and my mom worked for a couple of extra years, my dad took over a few chores that my mom had traditionally done. So that he had things to keep him busy while taking some of the burden off mom.
How do I say this? I think that it’s great for one spouse to retire but that doesn’t mean that they get to have the same responsibilities that they did while working.
But maybe your husband needs to be busier. You know what they say, an object at rest stays at rest, an object in motion stays in motion.
No idea how that gets accomplished though.
Adding…the recommendation is to see your MD and get tested. If hormone levels are low, get on a replacement dose. These podcast hosts are not recommending a DIY approach and not recommending performance enhancing drugs. Just BHRT.
Another important point the podcast hosts were making is women are often knowledgeable and well-versed about the symptoms of menopause and BHRT solutions, but men might not be. Or, men are hesitant to see their MD about it, or think the decline in zest for living is normal.
@Knowsstuff mentioned a mens group. JMO, but I think (single sex) support groups can be so very important, especially as we age. We can get really dependent on the family unit – nothing wrong with that – but having a group of friends to golf with, talk with, discuss books, do volunteer work together, strength train together… can make a huge difference in one’s well-being.
My H is still working 4 days a week.
Hobbies-He plays beach volleyball several days a week and tennis. He also loves the ocean and usually takes a quick swim after VB. He also will on occasion surf. He’s beyond the days of getting up early to surf or drive for waves but he enjoys getting in the water. He likes the beach but can’t just sit and enjoy the sun and sand. He also enjoys snowboarding and skiing and camping.
Another friend adopted a golden retriever and he needs several good walks a day. My friend is still working and the dog gets her H out of the house and provides her H with some needed exercise.
He also gets satisfaction out of doing home repairs. Yesterday he cleaned the windows, did a pool repair and fixed something else in the house. He is not one who can sit still and do nothing all day. I worry that once he retires he will have a hard time not having a full schedule. He strongly dislikes his job and talks of retiring from actively working. It’s a family business so he will never fully stop working.
@abasket I know several men who volunteer at the Food bank. Another volunteer activity several men I know enjoy is harvesting fruit from homes and orchards that is given to non profit agencies for food programs. It’s outside and requires physical agility and I think a lot of men find it satisfying to do physical work. What about getting an electric bike. He can get physical exercise but have the electric backup.
When my kids played youth soccer, a lot of retirees were refs. The center ref’s would get paid $45/game and the AR’s (side ref’s) would get paid $35/game.
It’s great money when you ref 2-3-4 games each Saturday and Sunday, during the Fall and Spring. And it gets you out on the “pitch,” where the grass is usually green, unless you’re ref’ing, beach soccer or Futsal. 
The local youth leagues are usually desperate for refs, but you do have to take a class here locally, which is 15-18 hours and then you take a test.
**Together we take a walk nightly after dinner. Everyday! Our dog will not let us not walk. Fitbit/ Apple Watch/iPhone or any smart phone tracker of steps is a good goal oriented step. Also, we do weight lifting indoors daily.
I think the key is to make short and long term goals. Goals for today and tomorrow and this week. Honey do list that’s fairly pleasant I make for myself to do and H.
So interesting the wide range of activities people have. And activity levels and abilities!
@deb922 is so smart. The home chores things is real. He has always taken care of the bills and banking for the most part. (can literally take him a whole day to pay the bills or balance the checkbook which he still insists on doing - it’s like a “side” activity while he watches tv.
He has started doing more of the laundry. Especially his own which he seems to be 75% of our laundry. He was doing mine too (not putting it away but washing/drying) but after 2 years of not following my directions of what clothes can’t be dried and such I said I would just do my laundry myself.
There is certainly much more he could do and needs to be done. He seems over the home fix up and repair stage. This is not new but has been going on for quite a while. I/we are in entry stage of thinking about getting a new house (new to us) in the next year or two. He doesn’t seem against this - but has not expressed a lot of opinion.
You know, overall I think HE is “happy” with his limited lifestyle. Maybe it’s my own issue that he is happy with doing nothing! He’s not old! Even our kids have noticed and have suggested some stuff. He was suppose to help S and DIL with a couple simple projects at their house (he actually in the past has been pretty handy - he and his dad built a whole garage at a previous house and H built a big shed at our cottage). But he has not followed through with S and DIL.
The following through is a BIG problem. I’ve tried to suggest methods of lists - not that I would create a list of to-do’s but that HE would - he just won’t take that organizational step.
Such a timely question, @abasket. I have felt the same way, especially with Covid. H is not retired, more semi retired, but without work travel and less work, he is rattling around the house and sticking his nose in other’s business too much (mine and kids). I appreciate the advice. H needs some friends and a men’s group, I think, guys he can call up for a bike ride or golf game. He is too dependent on me and crashes my stuff.
If only we could get a dog…
We’ve had a dog for over a year now. She keeps me VERY busy, when I’m not in the gym or at work.
DOG IT IS!!!
As others have recommended, I would suggest your husband get a physical if he hasn’t done so lately. You mentioned he’s overweight- he might need a nudge from his doctor. Losing weight and movement may help his energy level. But, I know you know this since you sound like a very active person who takes her health seriously:)
If he doesn’t want to commit to a dog, I have a friend who is very involved with training guide dogs. I don’t really know the details, but she constantly has a new one around. They get them socialized, and then they “graduate” to be a helper for someone and a new dog comes in. You still get attached, but it’s very different knowing that your dog is moving on to help someone in need and not that your dog just died.
I supposed a bit like the kids moving on. I miss having everyone here, but I won’t be happy if I end up with 4 30somethings living in my house either. I love you, but it’s time to go be productive somewhere else.
However, how many men have not seen any ads for testosterone-replacement therapy for “low T[estosterone]” that, as the ads imply, is rampant among older men?
Given the rise of such advertising over the last decade or so, it seems unlikely that men are unaware of such things (even though the claims may be overstated for marketing purposes).
Does staying home annoying my wife count as a hobby? ?
Over this extended ‘summer break’ I have taught DH to cook some of his favorite meals. It’s helpful to me. I also forced him to get out on the golf course w S (now he’s hooked). He also took a class at the local uni before lockdown. H likes to tinker around the house - ergo, we have a lot of unfinished projects!
A friend’s H likes too sew & cook, and he’s GOOD at it.
With all the very big problems from Covid, I do feel bad that it has prevented my older DH (who recently turned 65 and really needs more exercise) from doing Silver Sneakers at fitness center with his buddy that did so pre-Covid. And actually I had hoped to join whichever gym he selected (the friend goes to several).