Jonri, you are a lawyer. I did not use the word “voluntarily”. 
"The woman is not causing any problems now. She has moved on. Lol. She might have a better character than us. "
It is very likely that mom did not “move on” because she has a better character than us. It is possible that she realized that her vile tweets and crybaby interviews could be exposing her to potential libel and defamation liability and creating a problem for her hubby’s employer.
Dstark, you are way too nice of a person to defend this not-so-nice mom.
As I mentioned, I flew with a lap baby once. It was exhausting to hold that precious 12 lbs for 5 hours despite the help from her dad. That was the end of flying with lap kids for me. The mom and everyone else would have been much better off and safer if the family had a car seat for Ivy. They had already bought the seat to put that car seat in.
Agreed, dstark, you definitely didn’t. However, you DID say
I drew the conclusion that you thought her motivations in moving on were good ones–so I used the word “voluntarily,” I think it’s more likely it’s because of the backlash.
I wasn’t trying to distort what you said intentionally. …and that isn’t meant to be snarky. As you and I both know, but others may not, we usually “play well together” on this forum or to put it another way, you’re one of the CC posters I respect a lot.
Dstark, the mother’s very own Tumblr says that the ultimate solution was to have her sit in her own seat, belted in.
Going after the husband’s company is just wrong. Really, now, get a grip.
DStark–I called them for scamming before I knew all of the story. If one purchases a cheaper ticket for an under two kid who needs to have a ticket and then puts the kid in a more expensive section by placing the kid on a parents lap–that’s bending the rules. Having read all the subsequent posts and Jonri’s summary, it’s clear the situation was more complicated and the published facts vary.
That being said–I have read the mother’s Tweets and they are mean-spirited. I have great sympathy for her kid’s condition and I understand that parenting a handicapped child must be very hard. I have a special needs grandson, so I’ve seen it firsthand. And, I don’t actually know what it is like because I haven’t walked in the shoes of a parent with a handicapped child–you are right about that.
I believe the mother’s Tweets and appearances on talk shows aren’t worthy of someone who is asking others to show more concern and compassion for her or any handicapped child. Her energies might be better spent in some other type of advocacy. The mother did not put her best self forward. It appears that the FA may might have been more successful in finding a solution if she has a different approach. Letting the situation escalate to the point where kids are crying (if this is true) should not have occurred. The FA is the one who deals with difficult folks all the time–she must certainly have realized that some approaches to getting passengers to flow guidelines are better than others. Maybe she didn’t put her best self forward either.
I think there’s no more to say on this.
Fact is Elit failed. She failed to ‘get’ that while a 2 year requires a boarding pass that also means they need to be in their own seat buckled up. She failed to “get” that as her special needs child grows she will more and more and more need to understand what is required and needed adaptively for all kinds of activities and all these trips will simply need more planning to make sure the disabled child is safe and able to participate. She failed because she clearly got snarky with a FA who wasn’t going to break the rules for Elit. She failed because she held up a whole plane of people. She failed because then she took to social media thinking “she” was educating others when in fact “she” was the one who needed education. Like I said earlier, maybe she’s just not very smart, or maybe she truly is clueless about traveling with a disabled child …both are preferable to simply being an entitled brat which is how she sounds in her social media.
“Going after the husband’s company is just wrong. Really, now, get a grip.”
Agree. This is a completely wrong and stupid reaction. Hope the company gets more, not less business.
I always thank FAs when I deplane, even the grumpy ones. My hat is off to all of you who has to deal with the public in your daily work. It is not easy!
I don’t know the mom. I don’t find her thinking and emotions out of the ordinary.
How many of us, when we are angry, would like to go on the internet and complain?
I would on occasion.
I threatened to do this a few years ago. I brought a bike in to a bike shop to be tuned up. The bike shop was supposed to take a week to tune up the bike. Took about a month. I was angry. I rode the bike home and realized when I got home, it was the wrong bike. Brought the wrong bike back to the store. After many accusations, and after I yelled at several employees for giving me the wrong bike, I told the owner of the bike shop there were going to be nasty reviews on yelp unless he paid for the bike I originally brought into the store.
The bike owner did pay. I deposited the check. As soon as I deposited the check, I realized when I picked up the bike, I stopped on the way home to have an ice cream cone. After leaving the ice cream store, I got on the wrong bike and rode the wrong bike home.
Maybe, I am not that nice. Sometimes, I am not that nice.
http://kirsch71.■■■■■■■■■■/post/106722269648/united-with-ivy
“I don’t know the mom. I don’t find her thinking and emotions out of the ordinary.”
Well, I don’t find them out of the ordinary either for an entitled brat who is accustomed to being the exception to the rule. But, I definitely get why most people don’t care for her attitude much.
That phone call is coming…
I read the link. Many times after reading posts here.
I have ****ed up plenty in my life. I would start a list, but am concerned I might break the internet. Which wouldn’t be nice.
Alh, lol!
It’s a massive list… I am thinking big data here.
“I don’t know the mom. I don’t find her thinking and emotions out of the ordinary.”
I don’t understand what you mean by “her emotions.” Of course she’s fiercely protective of and loves her special needs daughter - that’s not in question.
We are surprised that an obviously intelligent, well-traveled, well-to-do family didn’t know this, for several reasons:
- They are clearly upscale and not unfamiliar with airplane travel. This isn’t their first rodeo.
- They are clearly advocates for giving their daughter a full life in other regards (bicycle carrier, etc.).
- They have the means to investigate and purchase special equipment if necessary.
- They have three older children and presumably have flown with those children, who did not spring out of the womb at their current ages.
- One expects the parent of ANY 3 yo to know that a child needs his / her own seat – so it’s even more surprising when a parent of a disabled 3 yo doesn’t know this, because someone with a disabled child needs to be MORE proactive in ensuring needs are met, not less.
Do you think that they just showed up at their hotel in the Dominican Republic without informing the hotel there was a special-needs child in the party and ensuring if they needed special accommodations, those accommodations could be procured?
Here’s a thought starter, dstark. Last time I was on an island, our party rented a boat for the day. The captain of the boat was responsible for our safety, ensuring we had life vests, ensuring we kept our arms and legs inside, etc. That’s their job.
Do you suppose that if this family went on a boat down in the DR, do you think they showed up at the boat and then revealed the daughter was disabled, or do you think that they would (rightly so) call ahead, inform the captain, inquire about what safety equipment might be appropriate, etc.? Would you expect the captain of a rental boat who is responsible for safety to just say “aw, go ahead, it’s rough having a special needs child, hold her on your lap” or would you anticipate that the captain of a rental boat would have specific protocol in place? So I’m not sure why one would expect an airline to be much different.
Elit’s story reminds me of one I saw in the Washington Post a few years ago. For some inaugural ball or other VIP occasion, cars had been towed away from Union Station and reparked on neighboring streets. No one was ticketed, the cars were just moved so the Secret Service could secure the area.
Well, all the cars with handicapped plates were moved too and one person couldn’t find their car afterwards. Some official drove the person around and around and they couldn’t find it. She wrote a scathing letter to the WaPo (and if it were today, she would have gone onto social media too). The problem? SHE was not the handicapped person, that would be her husband, and he wasn’t even with her that night! She was all outraged about a car with handicapped tags being moved but just didn’t see that using those tags to park in a handicapped spot was wrong if there was no passenger who needed that access. The car was found.
I am curious, at what age does Elit want to continue her daughter as a lap child? If she cannot “sit” at 3 and the family obviously is opposed to following FAA rules, will the family not fly anymore? The mother needs to know her name is Elit, not Elite.
They are flying on United next month to Mexico and getting a seat, since now they know about seats.
^as if they didn’t know about seats and regulations before. Please.
Pizzagirl, the family flew and never had a problem. They flew, what two weeks earlier? No problem. Do you think their past experiences are meaningless?
I can put thoughts in the mom’s head too. “It is a pain to lug a special seat around. We never needed one before. We did not need a special seat two weeks ago. Therefore, we don’t need a special seat”.
Emotions affect thinking. We have trigger points that will set us off. My wife is a very intelligent person, but I can go upstairs right now and say something that will set her off. She knows my trigger points too.
I have never met an intelligent person that was all knowing, that knew everything he or she was supposed to know, or that did not do stupid things. I never met an intelligent person that did not react with emotion at times.
If you do know of such a person, can you give me his or her contact information?