Mother’s Day 2025

I really do appreciate that son feels this way - absolutely - but do hope he’ll find another to take up some of these feelings someday.

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We are having the local two Ds and their families over for supper. My one ask was for my husband (and the SILs) to take care of the food. Take out is fine. Anything is fine. It’s just that one family is vegetarian, one person is dairy-free, and two toddlers are super picky. Everyone is okay with it being vegetarian and I can make it work – Taco bars, potato bars, veggie chili with toppings, salad bars – but on Mother’s Day I’d like someone else to do the work! They are planning to pick up take-out bulgogi! Awesome!

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This is my first mother-less day. My mom died in February. It’s going okay, its just feels a little empty. I miss having her wish me a happy mothers day also. D, SIL, and GD came over this morning. D and I went for a hilly 5 mile
hike. The others started out with us but turned back after about a mile. Those 5 year old legs could not keep up! S and the 2 GS Face-timed me, but those silly boys were more interested in making a mess in the sink.

All in all, its been a low key, but relaxing day.

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D was here this weekend but it really wasn’t a quality visit. She sent some pretty flowers and treated us to brunch but arrived late on Friday, spent most of Saturday out and left early afternoon. It seemed Mothers Day was incidental to her other plans. She does all the “right” things but it just felt hollow. Talked to S who was disappointed his card didn’t arrive. Yesterday I went to the cemetery and cleaned up around my parents grave and their marker. Not the greatest weekend.

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We celebrated MD with my son and his wife last weekend. Flowers they got from the farmer’s market are still looking pretty good, after a week.
They wanted to pay for our “fancy brunch” last week, but husband picked up the check (I picked the place and we had multiple mimosas - I didn’t expect or want kids to pay).
Today husband and I did a 43 mile bike ride, with brunch at the halfway point (just because it was available, it wasn’t planned). We did indulge in adult beverages, which we don’t normally do when we are riding.
I received texts today from son, DIL and step-d. Other son doesn’t talk to us, so I’m sure I won’t be hearing from him.

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DH and I flew 5,000 miles and spent Mother’s Day with our daughter and her husband. We did not play up the Mother’s Day aspect as it was my son-in-law’s first one without his mom, who died unexpectedly and far too young several months ago. Our daughter made a reservation for lunch and a concert, which was a wonderful way to spend the day. She hasn’t lived in our town since graduating from high school nearly fifteen years ago, so any time with her is precious.

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My husband and I ended up having a lovely Mother’s Day. The weather was perfect and we went first to a farm/nursery and then walked around a nearby historic downtown.

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My California kid ALWAYS sends me flowers even though I ask him not to - it is easy, I get it. He wishes he could be here and I wish he could be too (he actually will be for 5 days in September!!!). I don’t think it’s passive aggressive, maybe a little bit lazy, but honestly, not for a guy.

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Really nice day here. I started out with my brother and his family wrapping up my niece’s college graduation weekend. Flew home with no delays, H picked me up, my dog was thrilled to see me, my H had installed the rabbit fencing I asked for, my D message from Europe where she’s on a business trip, I had beautiful cards waiting for me, and a beautiful gift from D. H made dinner, opened my favorite wine, and we went for a lovely walk on the lake.

Mother’s Day tends to be bittersweet for me as my mom is gone and I also lost a child but this year felt like there was much to celebrate.

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Not many can say they walk on water. I bow to you, @momofboiler1.

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During our family zoom call, the kids reminded me about the mystery package that arrived last week with lovely gardening hat, said it was from both of them. I had such a nice time later planting geraniums (which I’ve been propagating indoors each year since my mom died) while wearing the new hat.

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I agree with the poster above who would be happy without the holiday. I think when the kids are little, they don’t know, then at a certain age it just becomes more an obligation. everything else that was said above, I agree with, too. Remember me on my birthday and I’m happy with that.

I got flowers and they split the cost for Bose Quietnose headphones for plane rides for me since I can’t hear thru the headphones provided and have to read the movies. It was very thoughtful, but made me feel bad they spent that money.

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Friend only thinks it aggressive because SIL sends flowers that require her brother to go to their mother’s house when the flowers arrive (mother gets anxious if things are delivered and sit on her porch) and then spend an hour cutting the stems and arranging them into vases (she sends 2 dozen long stem roses). Mother is 102. She’d be happy with a rose in a bud vase to set in front of her at the table for a meal.

Flowers are fine, just make them arrive ready to go and be enjoyed, not extra work for someone else.

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I just think it is weird to send something people don’t want. My mom also doesn’t want flowers because there is work in getting rid of them later, so we don’t send her flowers any more.
Some people buy things they would want for themselves

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I had a nice day yesterday. H and I went on a 5 mile hike near the ocean and the weather was a bit warm for San Diego in May, but lovely.

D1 and SIL as well as D2 came to our house and made dinner. H did the grilling and the rest of them did all of the side dishes while I drank my Aperol Spritz! We had fresh strawberries and whipped cream for dessert since we had gone strawberry picking on Saturday.

Both girls brought me fresh flowers (which I love) and I received lovely cards from them.

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Don’t! They have jobs and if I remember correctly, you and your husband are paying for the trip to France!

Don’t feel guilty that adult children with jobs bought a gift that you will use on a family trip!

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I wanted to put this in a separate post.

Yesterday was nice in that my husband and I did something nice together.

We went to a nice brunch, I stopped at a store and bought 2 shirts that I will likely wear bi-weekly at least. Husband had a golf lesson.

My daughter and her husband called, we had a nice talk. Called my mom. My husband called his.

The only thing. At 7pm, my son texted that it had been a crazy day, happy Mother’s Day. Whomp whomp.

My husband was annoyed. My son has a 3 year old so they had their own Mother’s Day celebration. He thought it would have been nice if he could have found 10 minutes to call his mom.

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H and I had a good day–we did garden work and H made dinner for me. None of the kids were here, but one is getting married in two weeks, so we’ll see them all soon. Also, my daughters got me two gift certificates–one for yoga passes and one for Pilates. I go to both studios on a regular basis so it was a very useful gift and one that I really appreciate.

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Oh, I think the Mother is happy to get the flowers, she just panics when someone delivers something to the door (other than the mailman and the milkman). I don’t really think the brother (my friend’s husband) cares that much but he grumbles about everything (he’s 75, so grumbling comes with the territory).

My friend doesn’t like her SIL and REALLY doesn’t like her SIL’s partner, so almost anything they do annoys my friend. Her husband rightly said it is his only sister and he doesn’t want to cause trouble since they’ve made it 75+ years so he puts up with the SIL doing annoying things.

These are really first world problems. If anyone wants to send me 2 dozen roses I’d love it and happily cut and arrange them.

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And this is why I don’t like Mother’s Day. It’s too obligatory. My DH postpones to call his mom out of guilt. I’m the one to pick out a card, get a gift certificate, addressed, stamp, get his signature and send. I’m not fond of her so I stopped buying meaningful gifts.

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