My boyfriend thinks smoking is cool

BCEagle91 · June 12, 2009, 10:26pm

Boy:
I remember every little thing
As if it happened only yesterday
Parking by the lake
And there was not another car in sight
And I never had a girl
Looking any better than you did
And all the kids at school
They were wishing they were me that night

And now our bodies are oh so close and tight
It never felt so good, it never felt so right
And we’re glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife
C’mon! Hold on tight!
C’mon! Hold on tight!

Though it’s cold and lonely in the deep dark night
I can see paradise by the dashboard light

Girl:
Ain’t no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely dressed

Ain’t no doubt about it
Baby got to go and shout it
Ain’t no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed

Boy:
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely dressed

Baby doncha hear my heart
You got it drowning out the radio
I’ve been waiting so long
For you to come along and have some fun

And I gotta let ya know
No you’re never gonna regret it
So open up your eyes I got a big surprise
It’ll feel all right
Well I wanna make your motor run

And now our bodies are oh so close and tight
It never felt so good, it never felt so right
And we’re glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife
C’mon! Hold on tight!
C’mon! Hold on tight!

Though it’s cold and lonley in the deep dark night
I can see paradise by the dashboard light
Paradise by the dashboard light

You got to do what you can
And let Mother Nature do the rest
Ain’t no doubt about it
We were doubly blessed
Cause we were barely seventeen
And we were barely–

We’re gonna go all the way tonight
We’re gonna go allt he way
An tonight’s the night…

Radio Broadcast:
Ok, here we go, we got a real pressure cooker
going here, two down, nobody on, no score,
bottom of the ninth, there’s the wind-up and
there it is, a line shot up the middle, look
at him go. This boy can really fly!
He’s rounding first and really turning it on
now, he’s not letting up at all, he’s gonna
try for second; the ball is bobbled out in center,
and here comes the throw, and what a throw!
He’s gonna slide in head first, here he comes, he’s out!
No, wait, safe–safe at second base, this kid really
makes things happen out there.
Batter steps up to the plate, here’s the pitch–
he’s going, and what a jump he’s got, he’s trying
for third, here’s the throw, it’s in the dirt–
safe at third! Holy cow, stolen base!
He’s taking a pretty big lead out there, almost
daring him to try and pick him off. The pitcher
glance over, winds up, and it’s bunted, bunted
down the third base line, the suicide squeeze in on!
Here he comes, squeeze play, it’s gonna be close,
here’s the throw, there’s the play at the plate,
holy cow, I think he’s gonna make it!

II. Let Me Sleep On It

Girl:
Stop right there!
I gotta know right now!
Before we go any further–!

Do you love me?
Will you love me forever?
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife?
Do you love me!?
Will you love me forever!?
Do you need me!?
Will you never leave me!?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life!?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife!?
I gotta know right now
Before we go any further
Do you love me!!!?
Will you love me forever!!!?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I’ll give you my answer in the morning

Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I’ll give you my answer in the morning

Girl:
I gotta know right now!
Do you love me?
Will you love me forever?
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away and will you make me your wife?
I gotta know right now!
Before we go any further
Do you love me?
And will you love me forever?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it
Baby, baby let me sleep on it
Let me sleep on it
And I’ll give you my answer in the morning
Let me sleep on it!!!

Girl:
Will you love me forever?

Boy:
Let me sleep on it!!!

Girl:
Will you love me forever!!!

III. Praying for the End of Time

Boy:
I couldn’t take it any longer
Lord I was crazed
And when the feeling came upon me
Like a tidal wave
I started swearing to my god and on my mother’s grave
That I would love you to the end of time
I swore that I would love you to the end of time!

So now I’m praying for the end of time
To hurry up and arrive
Cause if I gotta spend another minute with you
I don’t think that I can really survive
I’ll never break my promise or forget my vow
But God only knows what I can do right now
I’m praying for the end of time
It’s all that I can do
Praying for the end of time, so I can end my time with you!!!

Boy:
It was long ago and it was far away
and it was so much better than it is today

Girl:
It never felt so good
It never felt so right
And we were glowing like
A metal on the edge of a knife

HImom · June 12, 2009, 10:29pm

*becomeanex.org *has some great info & streaming video on folks who are trying to quit as well as facts & info about smoking and the dangers it poses to the smoker, the people whose presence they smoke in front of (2nd hand smoke) & those they come in contact with AFTER they smoke (3rd hand smoke–particulate matter & smells, etc which linger on them). The site is run by American Legacy, partly with funds from tobacco settlement money.

I work regularly with folks who are suffering some of the ravages of smoking–emphysema and chronic bronchitis, known collectively as COPD, Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. COPD is the 2nd leading cause of disability in the US & 4th leading cause of death. There’s a lot more info at learnaboutcopd.org. Tobacco is made to be horribly addictive. The girl who has been giving your BF cigarettes is no friend of yours or his–with friends like that who needs enemies?

Smoking is said to be THE TOUGHEST addiction to quit–tougher than heroin, alcohol, other drugs. BIG Tobacco puts as many additives into its products as possible to keep it that way.

BeautifulNerd219 · June 12, 2009, 11:12pm

Hmm…I’m not sure then. There’s no really good way to tell him how you feel w/o thinking that you’re nagging him. You can only tell him how you feel about it, and hope for the best OR give him an ultimatum which I doubt you will do.

interesteddad · June 12, 2009, 11:14pm

No need for additives when you’ve got nicotine. The tobacco companies have long known that they are simply selling a drug delivery device for nicotine addicts. Now, the pharmaceutical companies are grabbing a share of the nicotine addiction market as well. Note that they don’t market their product against smoking. Their ads market against the horrors of stopping nicotine use.

There are three reasons that nicotine addiction is so hard to break, even though the actual physical withdrawal is not particulary rough:

a) Billions of dollars of marketing over decades and decades convincing smokers they can’t possibly quit using nicotine. A marketing effort that has now been joined by the drug companies. Of course, it’s not actually impossible. 46 million Americans are now ex-smokers, 90% of them just quitting cold turkey. The quit rates increased steadily until the mid-1990s when the patch and gum became available over the counter and quit rates stagnated despite soaring anti-smoking social pressure. Now, gains are almost all from fewer teenagers getting trapped by the addiction.

b) Because smoking used to be socially acceptable, the number of cigarettes people smoke over years, each one giving a shot of drugs, works like Pavlov’s dog to program an association between everything in day to day life with smoking. Nicotine addicts actually come to believe they can’t eat, drink, sleep, or do anything else without smoking. That’s the trap. That stuff has to be re-associated with not smoking.

c) The addictive power of nicotine is the breathtaking ease with which the addiction can be reactivated. Studies show that 90% to 95% of former smokers, even if it’s been years, return to their full rate of smoking after smoking just one cigarette. It is literally impossible to become an ex-smoker unless you totally embrace the concept that you can never take another puff. It will never be OK to have just one. Or, “just a taste to remind myself of how bad it tastes” or any of the other nonsense that trips people up.

ADad · June 12, 2009, 11:28pm

(I don’t know who first said this, but I’ve always liked it.)

galoisien · June 13, 2009, 4:24am

An organic chemistry lecture on the 5000+ carcinogenic derivatives of burnt tobacco.

Be frank with him.

Social smoking is BS.

But I understand the pressure. Smoking can be a social activity, because for one, at my dorm, a lot of international students often went out together to smoke, and there would be a lot of gossip and talk, and it’d be really disheartening when you’re trying to play beer games (responsibly!) and then the whole group wants to leave the room for a smoke.

interesteddad · June 13, 2009, 10:20am

It’s only “social” for those students because a group of drug addicts all need to get their next fix at the same time and, these days, have to go outside huddled in the rain to do it. Their drug addictions won’t allow them to see how degrading it is, so they rationalize being junkies huddled in doorways inhaling their drug every hour on the hour as a “social” activity. They end up in social clusters because, increasingly, people simply do not want to associate with smokers, so their social options are limited.

Statistically, their drug addiction will kill about half of them – far more than every other kind of addiction (alcohol, heroin, etc.) combined.

MomofWildChild · June 13, 2009, 4:06pm

Smoking is a complete deal-breaker for me. I’m pretty upset that our esteemed President can’t manage to kick the habit. Anyone stupid enough to smoke should not be in consideration to be your boyfriend.

Columbia_Student · June 13, 2009, 4:40pm

^Same for me. I wouldn’t even go on a date with someone who smokes. I’m biased against smokers period.

interesteddad · June 13, 2009, 8:19pm

He’s a drug addict. Until he accepts that and believes that he will enjoy life more without his addiction, he won’t quit. Obviously, the nicotine gum isn’t helping him. He’s been smacking that for two and a half years and still smoking. Kind of ironic that his own government regulations forbid health agencies from offering smokers the option of quitting without purchasing nicotine gum, patches, or other drugs.

catsushi · June 13, 2009, 9:11pm

^^Lol, our president is a drug addict. The horrible thing is that part of my bf’s reasoning is that if the president can do it, then he should be fine, too.

Actually, she’s a white female, like me. He is black. The way I see it, he already has a lot of challenges he’s going to be facing in the future (racism isn’t dead), and smoking is just going to make it harder. He has such big dreams, he’s made it so far, getting an addiction would take away from everything he has gained. That white girl can probably get away with smoking. She’ll just hit 30 and then look like death (I’m Russian and I can’t tell you how many beautiful Russian women I have seen smoke away their youth), but he can’t afford to do that.

Thanks for the support everyone! I kind of felt like the “bad guy” for putting my foot down.

I keep pressing the health issues, but he figures he’ll lose a month or a year and that living for the now is worth much more. Can anybody tell me about the social repercussions of smoking? Any smokers out there trying to quit?

Shrinkrap · June 13, 2009, 9:31pm

"Actually, she’s a white female, like me. He is black. "

With all due respect, I figured she wasn’t black. Like I said, I believe statistics show Black teens aren’t that “in” to tobacco. I’m sort of joking, but all he needs is to be walking around with a white girlfriend and smoking a cigarette…Good luck!

Shrinkrap · June 13, 2009, 10:04pm

Cigarette Use Among High School Students—United States, 1991-2007

[JAMA</a> – Cigarette Use Among High School Students–United States, 1991-2007, September 17, 2008, 300 (11): 1292](<a href=“Cigarette Use Among High School Students—United States, 1991-2007 | Adolescent Medicine | JAMA | JAMA Network”>Cigarette Use Among High School Students—United States, 1991-2007 | Adolescent Medicine | JAMA | JAMA Network)

The differences in current cigarette use among racial/ethnic subgroups suggest that lower rates of current cigarette use among high school students are achievable. The data in this analysis show that current cigarette use remained stable among white and Hispanic students overall from 2003 to 2007, but among black students overall, current cigarette use continued to decline. This decline can be attributed largely to declines among black female students. Whereas rates among black male students remained stable from 2001 to 2007, black female students showed a continued decline in current cigarette use from 1999 to 2007. In 2007, black female students had the lowest rate of current cigarette use among all sex and racial/ethnic subgroups.

BTW; I know your not in high school.

catsushi · June 13, 2009, 10:13pm

Maybe you’re right, but I’m really unhappy that the fact that I’m “a white girlfriend” is on the same level as smoking.

Shrinkrap · June 13, 2009, 10:16pm

Not what I meant, but I don’t blame you for being offended. Less smoking, less drinking, are two of the only risk factors Black male teens ( like my son) have in their favor. I don’t know a better way to say it, but some folks, maybe the black ones, maybe the black female ones, are going to wonder what your boyfriend is thinking. Sounds like he’s willing to stop for you, and for now, I think that’s good enough. FWIW, I am sincere when I say good luck.

catsushi · June 13, 2009, 10:21pm

Most ads, I would think, are aimed towards the white population, or this has been clear throughout history. I had a funny picture I wanted to link (the ad says “Blow in her face and she’ll be yours” and pictures a guy from the 60s blowing smoke into the face of a woman who is looking endearingly at him).

Just look up Lil Wayne and there are plenty of photos of him smoking who knows what. This just also happens to be somebody my boyfriend greatly admires. Him, coupled with Obama, makes it seem like you can still be successful and smoke.

Shrinkrap · June 13, 2009, 10:28pm

“Most ads, I would think, are aimed towards the white population, or this has been clear throughout history.”

“Most” maybe, but not proportionally. I’ll post links if I can.

How about this…

<a href=“blackhealthcare.com - This website is for sale! - blackhealthcare Resources and Information.”>blackhealthcare.com - This website is for sale! - blackhealthcare Resources and Information.;

<pre><code>* A one-year study found that three major African American publications – Ebony, Jet, and Essence – had 12% more cigarette advertisements than widespread publications – Newsweek, Time, People, and Mademoiselle.8

Studies have found a higher density of tobacco billboards in racial/ethnic communities. For example, a study conducted in Los Angeles, California found the highest density of tobacco billboards (the number of billboards per mile) in African American communities and the lowest billboard placement in white communities.9
Approximately 90% of the billboards in African American communities featured an African American as the central character, while in other ethnic communities whites were portrayed as the central characters.9
The tobacco industry attempts to maintain a positive image and public support among African Americans by supporting cultural events and by funding minority higher education institutions, elected officials, civic and community organizations, and scholarship programs.10
</code></pre>

^“Just look up Lil Wayne and there are plenty of photos of him smoking who knows what”

Umm… based on the stupid lyrics, I’m betting it ain’t tobacco. Lil Wayne… not Obama.

So… your boyfriend thinks Lil Wayne and smoking is cool… hmm…

HImom · June 14, 2009, 12:44am

Actually, the problem with smoking is that it doesn’t just chop of days, weeks or years, it can make the person MISERABLE and gasping for air every minute of every day for DECADES. The person can also end up lugging supplemental O2 around & have a host of other health problems related to smoking–cancer, diabetes, kidney disease, emphysema, chronic bronchitis, and yes, cancer. Can’t see how that is worth any possible “cool” factor. Good luck–it’s tough for anyone to believe it could happen to them, even kids of smokers who watch their loved ones have awful health problems & have to help care for them sometimes succumb to tobacco themselves!

audiophile · June 14, 2009, 3:19pm

Here’s the true deal on being seen as “cool”: The reality is that smokers are viewed as either stupid or weak. So which is he?

Consolation · June 14, 2009, 6:47pm

I just came from saying goodbye to a dear friend who has stage 4 lung cancer and is forced to give up his career and vocation and go live with his parent in another state. He is wheelchair bound by mets to the spine.

He smoked for 15 years, hasn’t done so for a decade or two. It’s killing him and destroying his life anyway.

My boyfriend thinks smoking is cool

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