<p>One of my Ds teacher’s had some student that were part of a mission trip to dinner at his house- his wife was there, and there were several kids</p>
<p>this is different from a student and a teacher eating alone</p>
<p>First of all, it sounds like you’re mad jealous of your friend, and you shouldn’t be. If you work hard, you’ll go places in life. There’s no reason to be nasty and vindicative towards your peers because it “seems” like they’re getting a one-up on you - and you say this kid is your friend! Be happy, not jealous for him. The selfishness of some academically-obsessed people on these boards is just disgusting.</p>
<p>That said, it’s a little weird. Here lots of kids have great relationships with their teachers. I was never one to “buddy up”. Teachers feel like they need to be cool and friendly so that students can confide in them/see them as role models. Sometimes this need to be cool and friendly kind of crosses the line. Yes, they may like playing tennis with each other…but since teachers aren’t even allowed to give kids rides home in their cars…I find getting together outside of school kinda strange. That said I doubt anything shady is going on. This teacher is just being a little unprofressional and feels like he’s acting as a role model for your friend, so probably doesn’t see the harm in it. Do you know what’s going on in your friend’s life? Maybe he needs another adult to confide in for some reason.</p>
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how else are you supposed to get a good rec unless the teacher doesn’t know you very well? Also, how is what the teacher doing illegal? Have you heard any stories of teachers getting arrested because they play sports/tennis with their students? no…</p>
<p>seems to me you don’t want other people to get to know their teacher’s better, so you can get “citygirl” into a better college</p>
<p>I see citygirlsmom’s point. In general it’s not a good idea for students and teachers to get cozy in any regard. Obviously there will be exceptions–some teachers are also coaches, some teachers are younger, etc.</p>
<p>There is nothing wrong with hanging out with a teacher. They are your mentors. Ever other week I would have dinner with my teacher and talk about existentialism… Its nice to have an adult and talk about things in depth. You usually don’t get that with your friends.</p>
<p>i saw my teacher at a concert once…we went to the mosh pit together…</p>
<p>Why does everyone think things in terms of college admissions and recs? If he has fun, what’s the big deal?</p>
<p>^ That would be hilarious. I’d push some teachers into the pit.</p>
<p>Sorry if I think its a bit weird for a teacher to be having a private dinner with a student</p>
<p>And you can get to know your teacher like 98% of kids do, through school activitites, not through private meetings outside of school, which some might see as wrong</p>
<p>Read the posts by teachers and this topic…they make distinctions between private hanging out with students and group and public school activites…they are different</p>
<p>How did they start playing tennis together? Did they see eachother at a public court and decide to play? If they had a good game and feel like they are at the same level, they probably just have fun playing. Is the teacher a gambling addict (several of mine are) and challenge the student to a game? If so then maybe he challenged the student to a game to raise a grade or something (several of my teachers do things like play poker/black jack for test points and another played connect 4 to decide the date an essay was due). Did the teacher say “I heard that you’re good at tennis, want to play some time?” That is bordering creepy.</p>
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Whats wrong with playing tennis with teacher if the kid and teacher enjoy playing?</p>
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so do you also think its weird for students to have dinner once with their professors in college? (there’s a program like that at harvard)</p>
<p>It’s worth noting that, although it may be frowned upon to hang out one on one w/ a teacher outside of school, if the tennis courts are on campus grounds there’s probably little questionable about it. It’s no worse than a player staying after practice in the gym with a coach to work on his jump shots.</p>
<p>I know kids who make out with their teachers for grades… playing tennis with a teacher is not a big deal at all, in fact is sort of cool. Leave the kid alone, it’s not a big deal at all man. Grow up a bit?</p>
<p>there is a difference between a minor in HS and a college student…</p>
<p>whats wrong with it is that it is unprofessional for the teacher to do that, and the teacher is risking his job, like it or not and it shows poor judgement and if other students complain, well, they have the right to do that, and if a students grades can be questioned, as they should be, that is what’s wrong</p>
<p>an adult teacher does not socialize like that with a student alone</p>
<p>If there is nothing wrong, then telling the school about it will do no harm, but my guess is that the teacher would be told having this kind of social relationship is crossing the line</p>
<p>And comparing an official program at Harvard that to a social relationship between a high school student and an adult teacher, nice try</p>
<p>Not only is the “kid” 17-18 yrs old (likely 18 aka legal) but also both are male, I find it annoying how so many people seem to imply a sexual relationship when saying that playing tennis with a teacher is so bad. Do I think it’s a bit weird? Yes, but not inappropriate, esp. considering there could be as little as 4 yrs age difference.</p>
<p>Also, college frosh and HS senior isn’t that big of a difference and yet some people seem to think that just by virtue of college vs. HS that there’s some difference. I know seniors who are 19 and yet I’ll only be 17 when I start college. Would be be more appropriate for me to be spending time with a opposite sex college professor (who is likely much older than a HS teacher) than a 19 yr old senior with a young same sex HS teacher?</p>
<p>well if ur teacher is young
or at least under 30
that seems alright
and
its not like ur teacher will just give him a good grade cause he plays tennis with him</p>
<p>citygirlsmom you are entitled to your own opinion…I am sure not many people agree with it but many of us dont see the harm with playing tennis with a student.
This kid just seems like he is very jealous of his friend and looks for a reason why he has a higher grade than him. Study = Get better grades! Tennis has nothing to do with it (Most likely)</p>
<p>How do you know that its just studying? when a teacher socializes with a student that is all put in doubt</p>
<p>and to assume there is nothing sexual or flirtaous because they are both male? really?</p>
<p>Are you seriously going to go that indepth with this situation? You are going to complain about why he didnt get a 98 but he has a 96?..Your going from two men just playing tennis to sexual relations? Lets think rationally here…</p>
<p>To assume that instantly, I would say they are obviously paranoid and might need to visit a psychodynamic therapist. </p>
<p>You cannot instantly assume things like this , I am sure if the teacher has had previous accusations, Sure go ahead; But nothing was stated about that at all.</p>