It’s hilarious because in the country they come from, there was a huge rush to major in history (Korea) one time. A lot of boys born 5 to 10 years before me are history majors b/c of a popular historical comic released a couple of years ago.Unfortunately, they left before that boom started and still harbor “useful major” mentality.
@thumper1 150000 a year. They aren’t willing to foot the bill for any school except for UVA b/c they feel I can graduate early in less than 2 years and save them 50000 (UVA is more expensive than vandy if I go there for more than 2 years, but cheaper if I go less than 2 years. System of equations thing).
but this is only if this is realized! This is a HUGE gamble. They will FORCE me to do that.
I’ll get rejected to all my RD Schools. Parents forced me to write a hacked up, crappy essay the week before apps were due to CA (b/c they thought essays got me deferred from Chicago–wrong!).
It sounds like the problems run deeper than just this one application. Please talk to your guidance counselor or a trusted teacher and see if someone can mediate between you and your parents.
Oh, I missed Harvard and Yale. So they will pay for Duke, Stanford, Penn, Harvard, Princeton and Yale (and Chicago if defer changes to accept). Would you want to go to any of them?
Would they pay for CMU since you are a legacy? Would you want to go there?
They won’t pay for Dartmouth, Columbia, or Brown even though they are Ivies?
Would they pay for JHU, Northwestern, or WUSTL, or did they literally just make you apply for bragging rights?
Would you go to any of them? Maybe they will change their tune if you get accepted.
What if you “forget” to change Vandy to RD? Might they change their mind if you get in ED2? Or is the “bragging rights / saving face factor” too strong with this one?
And if you get shut out, UVa in 1.5 semesters is your (well, their) backup plan? That seems really risky.
With this messed up relationship, you should be concentrating on getting your education and becoming independent as soon as possible. You might need to rearrange course at UVA but if you can graduate and get a job faster, it sounds worth it to buy your freedom.
@AroundHere It’s much more complicated
They already sent a name under my name to withdraw my application to my AO. I sent her an email later that clarified I don’t want to and I have family issues.
Yes, they won’t pay for CMU, JHU, NU (They HATE NU. My dad is still salty af b/c he got rejected from there), WUSTL, Dartmouth, Brown, Columbia. It’s 100% for bragging rights, Ironically, these are the schools I actually want to go to, not Harvard, Yale, Duke, Stanford, Penn, Princeton, and that gang (they believe they won’t have to pay if I get in there b/c they have huge endowments).
If I forget to change Vandy to RD, they said they will sue the school. My dad seems pretty serious considering he forcefully and physically ripped my computer out of my hands a la United Airlines to send a message to the AO.
Yes, their plan is UVa in 3 semesters. Risky as heck
“They aren’t willing to foot the bill for any school except for UVA b/c they feel I can graduate early in less than 2 years and save them 50000”
Now I’m getting confused b/c this is different than what you have said before. Will they pay for ANY of your RD privates if you get accepted?
Pretty much–no unless they can guarantee total cost will be less than UVA. The only problem is that’s 100% going to happen b/c while the semester cost for the Uni, even EDII Vandy, will result in a tuition less than UVA. However, the duration of tuition payed is different, as UVA will only need to be done for 3 semesters
It may be on the late side now, but if your stats make you competitive for Vanderbilt, you can apply to Prairie View A&M and Tuskegee and hope that the full ride scholarship money at those schools has not been used up. If you do get a full ride, then you will be free from parental financial limits and the absolute veto power that they have over your college choices based on their monetary contribution and financial aid form cooperation.
http://www.pvamu.edu/faid/types-of-aid/scholarships/university-scholarships/
https://www.tuskegee.edu/programs-courses/scholarships/freshman-scholarships
I’m not going to pretend I understand a family situation like this. But it seems like you are going to have to escape this at some point in your life. So if it’s sooner rather than later, you can leverage your HS accomplishments for as close to a free ride as you can get, and simply do college without their help. After all you did say:
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Does that mean I have to major in what they want me to major? It's my life, not their's. <<
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If you want to live your life and not theirs, maybe now’s the time to start.
but then I will have to go to these schools, which I don’t want to move all the way to a school that does not offer the major I wish to pursue just for money
It’s feels like a zero sum game where there is no winning option @Wien2NC
Mind I have no car, no possessions (edit: I do, nvm. Still have no car), no nothing.
They genuinely overestimate my abilities, and let’s say I do get a full ride as @ucbalumnus said. Then I will have to prepare to never speak or meet them again.
Since they’re already talking to your GC could you ask your GC to let them know that the 3 semester plan is very risky and probably not in your best long-term interest?
no, they are talking to my AO @Sue22 but pretending that it is me. I changed my email password and credentials and told the AO the truth
You said that you have a job and some stuff that you can sell for money. That could pay for a bus, train, or plane ticket to a college with a full ride merit scholarship.
@Sue22 mind they don’t care about my interests. They only care about THEIR interests. They only care about THEIR lives. We are 100% politically, socially, etc. different. I can tell much more about how messed up and feckless my parents are (and the horrible things they say and do to me) but I won’t go further since some people I know IRL know my CC handle
@ucbalumnus Then yes, let’s say I get a plane ticket. Oh snap, I have no credit or phone number. Gosh, what can I do? I have no bank account, only physical money. Guess I am screwed…
Running away in this case will only worsen my rift with my parents., although my rift might actually be solved considering they tried to physically/literally kick me out of the house multiple times like how “true American parents do”
What you write seems to indicate that you would like to be free from your parents and their abuse. So would not speaking to them again be any loss?
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but then I will have to go to these schools, which I don't want to move all the way to a school that does not offer the major I wish to pursue just for money <<
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It’s not just for money. It’s your freedom.
I would suggest UAH. You would get up to 4 years full tuition + housing. Your loan + job would pay for books and meals. You could double major in philosophy and political science. or add a third major with Foreign Languages and International Trade. maybe add a Global Studies minor. you are so advanced you could probably pull it off. plus have lots of opportunities for paid co-ops, internships, research, etc.
even though UVa is a better school, IMO UAH would give you a better college experience and establish a better foundation for your future than rushing thru UVa in 1.5 semesters with an insane schedule that, frankly, I’m not sure is even doable.
https://www.uah.edu/admissions/undergraduate/financial-aid/scholarships
hey it’s just a suggestion. you can follow your parents’ plan, or a random stranger on the internet. clearly I think you have to go with random stranger on this one.