<p>To me the important question would be, why don’t you like the boyfriend? If it’s because you see some serious red flags–he’s disrespectful to your daughter, he takes her for granted, he drinks too much, he tries to run her life, etc.–that’s quite different than a situation where he’s just got a personality that rubs you the wrong way.</p>
<p>I’d try to have an honest, diplomatic discussion if there are serious red flags. But if it’s just that he isn’t the person you would pick for her, I’d say butt out and just keep the lines of communication open with your daughter.</p>
<p>Good advice, lunitari. I have always kept my big mouth firmly shut b/c you never know if today’s gf/bf is going to someday be a member of the family.</p>
<p>Camelia:I say if you have met a boy in college that you really like and it’s going well I don’t see why you should have to “take a break.” When I offered my opinion early on, I was referring to kids (such as my son) who was pursued by his former gf beginning the end of freshman year of high school. For that relationship to have gone on all four years (which is the way it seemed to be heading) was to me not healthy. I had no doubt that had we encouraged the relationship (as we had for the first year, expecting it to end at about that time), this girl would not have let go even when they went off to college. Because that was my S’s first and only gf, I just felt they were way too young for all that.</p>
<p>In your case, you are old enough to know if you are experiencing the real thing, and in that case, I don’t think “experience” is necessary at all. I know plenty of couples who met in college and have had wonderful marriages. My advice to you would be to just relax and enjoy this time in your life!</p>
<p>You know what your relationship is with your daughter. Of course, you don’t want to just shut out the subject if she wants discussion. But do be aware as many here are saying, that this could be your future SIL that you so dislike and what is said and done could affect future relationships a lot. Really, there is not much a parent can do about relationships. They generally flow the way the two some decide it to go, and you are the bystander, participating only occasionally. I would express my concerns without being too pushy about them, and I would not get personal about the young man. Clearly she likes/loves/cares for him.</p>
<p>I thought you parents were supposed to be old-fashioned. 
I’ve always thought sticking by your first love was supposed to be sweet, especially if it’s working and set to last so long?</p>
<p>How about offering to pay for a semester abroad for your delightful daughter? Help her find a ‘new’ environment where she can meet new people and experience new things? Just don’t be surprised if she falls for someone in Spain or England. She may very well meet another American on an abroad trip who goes to another school in the US. A semester abroad would be cheaper than a divorce if she sticks with this guy for another couple of years and marries him.</p>