<p>A good friend and I are starting one. I know they exist all over the place; I need help from those of you with experience. </p>
<p>With what frequency should we meet? How do we decide what books to read? Does someone lead the discussion at each meeting, or do we just wing it? How much chit-chat versus serious discussion should occur? Do we alternate whose house we meet at? What happens if one person becomes a pain in the neck and is annoying everyone else? </p>
<p>And so on and so on.</p>
<p>I know my virtual friends on CC have lots of advice and information. Thank you!!</p>
<p>The book club I belong to consists of moms of my daughter’s high school classmates. Even though they graduated two years ago, we’ve kept the club going because we enjoy each other’s company and like to hear how everyone’s children are doing. We meet once a month for lunch, and rotate who’s doing the hosting. We brown bag our lunches, and the host provides the beverages and dessert. </p>
<p>We do about half discussion and half chit-chat, although the proportion depends on the book. Some are worth lots of discussion and some not so much! We decide on books by having everyone make suggestions (some people bring in reviews, or have read a book and loved it) and there’s generally a consensus. No one really leads the discussion - we all sort of leap right in. And so far no one has been a pain in the neck. :)</p>
<p>Thanks, Booklady. My friend and I are parents of sons who are friends, and she’s left it totally up to me to invite others. (:() I’ve invited some women who are really smart but aren’t only from our town, so I’m hoping the variety adds some spice.</p>
<p>We meet once a month, the 4th Thursday. We all make suggestions on books and once of us just says OK, we’ll read that book. No real rhyme or reason to it. We try to read a biography or authobiography once a year and that’s the only criteria. We kind of have a leader, the woman who started this book club 10 years ago, but we all have equal input. People have moved in and out of the club over time. We have about 20 members, but usually only 10-12 come each time.
It depends on the book how much chit-chat versus serious discussion. Sometimes we only spend 10-15 minutes on the book, sometimes much longer. We each volunteer to host book club, usually several months in advance. The hostess provides food (often themed to the book if possible), but it’s not a full meal. We do more snack foods, maybe something like chicken salad or chili, and lots of desserts. Wine is served, and occasionally beer. We usually spend 1 1/2 to 2 hours at each meeting.
We have grown very close, some of us socializing outside of book club, and being a great source of support for family illnesses, the death of parents, etc.
Fortunately we haven’t had any annoying people, so I can’t address that.
We have a lot of fun!</p>
<p>my group’s format is similar to over30’s.<br>
Suggestions:
We generally assign the person who recommended a particular book to find discussion questions. These are readily available on line. It is nice to have ways to reconnect to the book if chit chat takes over, and so that the group doesn’t miss major themes, interesting details, etc.
We always have wine and a dessert, preferably tied somehow to the book: Middle Eastern dessert for Kite Runner, something made with honey for The Secret Life of Bees, etc.<br>
Don’t get too sucked in to Oprah books. You’ll know why after a few.<br>
We do a “classic” each year and also something regionally relevent to us (local author and/or local setting). Some summers we’ve read a Shakespeare play and then gone to see a performance instead of our discussion night.<br>
Enjoy!</p>
<p>My book club officially starts this week! (funny, seeing booklady also posting here). I’m starting mine at the library, so we’ve e-mailed the Friends of Library and posted signs. We’ve been in the planning stages for months. We’ve agreed on reading contemporary fiction, planning 2 months in advance so library can secure copies. We will rotate being “leader”. I’ll provide cookies for first meeting and hope others will join in. Meetings at our new library will be once a month. Members have been urged to offer suggestions.</p>
<p>For first meeting, the author has agreed to speak to us by phone. It was surprisingly easy–just an e-mail inquiry.</p>
<p>Several members who came to last meeting noted that they have been in other groups which became mostly social after a time. Meeting in the library will be more formal, but hopefully still fun.</p>
<p>My latest book club group is rather unorthodox. Several of the members go south for the winter, so we are in “hiatus.”</p>
<p>We usually decide each month on the next month’s book. Result: we often spend more time deciding what we will read next than we do discussing the book we just read. Food is important to our meetings (it is important to have priorities in life); we have met at restaurants, had a potluck dinner organized around a book’s theme, and just had nibbles at some one’s house. We are ecumenical in our reading: fiction, nonfiction, biography, classics. Almost all of our selections have been, er, serious or rigorous in some way- no fluff here. We have no formal discussion leaders, which is probably why our discussion often gets off track. But we are a group of women in different stages of our lives with different experiences and points of view-all of which makes for an interesting evening.</p>
<p>Other clubs I know about do it in other ways. One club decides on the books to be read 6 months at a time. Another has a fiction–non-fiction–fiction sequence to their book selections.</p>
<p>There are numerous on-line resources for you in addition to what you glean from us here. Have fun! (Oh, and let us know what you decide to read!)</p>
<p>proud of our Book Club so will tell your our secrets of success. Been reading together once a month since 1988. Very congenial group and we have read many of the great books on the Big Lists as well as many great contemporary things. Our lives have changed as our small children left our homes and grew up, but the reading has remained a facet of our lives. We have read largely fiction but the occasional non fiction is presented. (I think it helps to not have a willy nilly take on book genres…for instance some people have no interest in military history, New Age or advice books, others can’t bear short stories.) Our group mainly mines serious contemporary literary fiction and we don’t deviate a lot into nonfiction.<br>
Each member is expected to do a bit of research before landing on their title choice each year to make sure it is worth the time of the group to delve into the book. It is fun to pick your title each year, and not uncommon to bring a couple choices to the group to see which titles the group is keener on if you are on the fence…but once the list is made up, everyone is most polite about respectfully reading the book. We try to name books that have gone to paperback…but with the internet…buying hardbacks is now cheaper. We actually produce a list of the coming year’s titles every January so you can read ahead or shop for bargains if you want.<br>
We have only had a couple field trips together to hear famous writers etc. Some of us have some overlap socially or professionally but we actually don’t tend to see each other except once a month. So we are always happy to catch up with each other but aren’t sick of each other.
Size of group: I have a little professional training here, and group dynamics for discussions are often less disjointed and more cohesive in a group under the size of 12 if you want some intimate discussions and consistency over the years. It is very hard to stop people from breaking down into side conversations in big groups.
We found the that most vocal leaders were dominating the choices of books and sometimes the topics discussed (I was rather guilty of this) and we find that giving each person one month as presenter and leader works great to make sure the more shy group members get a chance to show what interests them. The presenter makes a presentation on the author and culls our some reviews for us after we eat a meal. We have discussion after that little presentation.<br>
We have 11 members and have only had to replace, say Goodbye to or add members a couple of times. We don’t all socialize together much outside of Book Club but we do mostly have children in the same decade, and have passed through many stages of life together.<br>
We do not meet in December. We meet on a week night.
Expectations: someone, not the presenter is the assigned host one of the 11 months and provides a light supper. Chocolate must be served as well as wine and beer…but the meal itself is usually boxed lunches or easy buffet style food. That way, we never start dreading when it is “our turn.” No one pulls out the silver or puts on a show. The hostess often sends out an email asking for a head count and sometimes offering a choice in the preordered dinner menu. Once in a while the food served is connected to the book. I think our group has a great balance between structure and high expectations in quality of the book and the discussion, and not overdoing it so it begins to feel like a burden. Our discussions are substantive but we always just socialize when we eat. The presentation is with desert and coffee. We do have a record of all the books we have read. </p>
<p>The bookclub I belong to meets once a month, on a weekday evening. There is 10 of us and we rotate being a hostess or a ficilitator of a discussion. A person that picked the title facilitates - we take it very seriously and do quite a bit of research beforehand. The discussion is always fabulous as we each try very, very hard to actually read the "assigned " book. The meal is traditionally linked to the book we are currently discussing, there is always wine and dessert. Sometimes, when the month is short or a lot of us are travelling or having other commitments, we do a movie night instead. We try to see a good book on a big screen
December is Holiday Party time, with husbands. Sometimes there is a book to discuss, sometimes not - if we pick a book, we generally try to pick one husbands would enjoy.
I love our monthly get togethers. We are all very close in age, althought our kids are all over the age spectrum.
The bookclub has brought us very close together. We see each other on other occasions as well, some of us run marathons together, our kids are in the same activities. We have seen each other through a lot, sickness, death in family, major house remodel , starting a new business- you name it!</p>
<p>Book club gone wrong…ours is a bit of a pathological mess. Started with many of us having kids in combination 1st and 2nd grade classes way back when, and now they’ve started college! We’re in a neighborhood that draws similar minded folk, and we very much appreciate each others presence in our lives. Each fall we have a planning meeting, and each member chooses a book for the year, as well as date to host, on a weeknight. Someone else types up the schedule for the year, with phone numbers and birthdays. The host provides soup, and members bring snacks and wine. Dessert is usually served. We have wonderful celebrations together, remember birthdays, celebrate each other’s kids, as most are classmates and friends from way back as well, and we got to know each other because we were all involved in the schools.</p>
<p>The pathology? The book is given little time, though I have good discussions elsewhere when I run into members. Some people habitually dominate the conversation, and there is far too much interrupting. Others are never heard from. Certain members social life centers on the group, and others prefer more arm’s length. Hurt feelings ensue. Some see it more as a therapy group. Others would love to just talk books at greater length. I think of dropping out, as our kids have moved on. But they are old and dear friends, most of them, so we limp along. And then there are wonderful times, filled with laughter and comradarie. Maybe that’s just life.</p>
<p>I’ve been in several different book clubs over the years due to moving around a lot. The book selection process is very important to me and can get controversial. I prefer making it a guideline that if you recommend a book for the club to read you must have already read it yourself. In one of my groups we read so many awful books in a row based on “well it sounded good” or “I liked his other book” etc. My current group, although a little different because we limit our focus to books on Asia, selects our books every 6 months. We all submit titles and descriptions by email then briefly discuss them at our meeting and take a vote. We take turns leading - I will lead on the book I recommended for May which I have read before.<br>
We meet at a teahouse downtown then go out to lunch together afterwards.</p>
<p>I love my book club. The age range is late 20s to late 80s. We are pretty haphazard on selections but get down to business for some intense discussion, then veer off into tangents. </p>
<p>My goal is to find or start a book club for couples. My DH is a passionate reader and I think he would like to talke about what he reads with someone besides me and the kids.</p>
<p>I’ll throw my two cents in here. We meet once a month on a Friday evening. One person chooses the book for the month, hosts the group by providing a light dinner and dessert. We have a designated person who leads the group. After a lot of interrupting and some hurt feelings we now have a rule where we go around the circle and each person speaks for about three to five minutes uninterrupted about the book. When everyone has had a chance to speak then the discussion is open for interrupting, other topics, whatever…
We’ve had a few people drop out because they wanted to read more non fiction or they didn’t ever find time to read the book. </p>
<p>mammall, interesting point about the couples club. One night some of the ladies from my book club ran into DH at a bar before coming to our house for book club. The three of them had a complete discussion of the book (he had read it too) before the ladies came over!</p>
<p>Just thought I’d throw this one out. My mother belonged to a bookclub where lots of people wouldn’t read the books, but they still liked each other, so they completely changed the rules and just took turns presenting the books, but didn’t worry about actually reading them.</p>
