We all sometimes face a difficult path. But your future goals are attainable from anywhere.
But the rest is up to you.
Please look at the many programs listed a few messages above. These are how you can stand out.
Good luck.
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Even if moving out is not an option at the moment, do consider the summer programs listed by @WayOutWestMom. Copy/past all the information in a file so you can access it when youâre a Sophomore or Junior and set a timer in your phone calendar so that you remember to work on the application during Xmas break next year.
In the meantime, continue getting involved, talk with the professor who was in charge of the Honors project to see if you can complete it, see if you can audit or take one more class in one of the subjects I listed.
Finally, start looking at ways to help your family become less dependent on you.
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OP- hugs to you.
If itâs any comfort- I know MANY successful adults whose college experiences were âless thanâ. Sometimes it was family circumstances- a kid who had already accepted a spot in âelite Uâ who had to withdraw over the summer due to a parentâs illness. The only option left at that late date was the local, non-flagship directional state U. Someone had to be there to supervise younger siblings, do pick ups, etc. while the parent was undergoing chemo. And by the time the medical situation stabilized (with a healthy parent, thank god) it was too late to transfer.
Sometimes it was pure finances- once the awards/bottom line were totaled up, the âmaybe we can swing thisâ became âthereâs no way we can afford thisâ.
Etc. There are a lot of reasons why Plan A and Plan B donât work out sometimes.
HOWEVER- your determination and work ethic and focus come through your posts. And THATâs whatâs going to make you a successful grownup, not the name on your diploma, and not how many Rhodes or Marshall or Fulbright Scholars you knew back in undergrad. Your peers may be in college to get their ticket punched- and thatâs their plan and thatâs fine. Youâre there to build the most substantial intellectual foundation you possibly can for yourself-- and I know you can do that.
Iâll bet there isnât a single professor at your U who would turn down the opportunity to have âmore youâ. Working in their lab, editing a paper, indexing or fact-checking an article, proof-reading a grant application, crunching the budget numbers for the departments annual âaskâ to the administration. Professors do a lot more than just show up in a lecture hall, and any way you can make yourself useful is value add for them. There are more ways to learn than just sitting in a classroom or working on a project with your classmates.
Youâve got this. Figure out a way to add a more rigorous layer to your education and then go get it. Rigor is everywhere if you want it. Does your degree require a senior thesis or research project? No? Guess what- ask your favorite professor to brainstorm ideas with you because you want to do a senior thesis even though itâs not required- and could that person become your faculty supervisor? Boom.
Your current parttime job is handing out keys in the housing office? Terrific. But if you could swap that job (admittedly pretty cushy because you can study for most of your shift) for a job in the Psych lab monitoring the temperature in the animal cages for some hormone/reproduction/genetics experiment a professor has going- even better. Yes, monitoring and cleaning and all the other undergrad type jobs in a psych lab gets tedious and boring. But nothing stops you from asking the professor âWhy is the pharmaceutical industry so interested in this subject?â and then getting invited to the monthly update meeting where the professor and her/his contact at the company funding the work discuss the preliminary findings.
Go make your own rigor!!! Big hugs.
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I will add one more thing to the excellent advice that @MYOS1634 and @blossom have given you.
Consider finding part-time paying employment.
D1 (who went to the less than prestigious University Near Mom, which has 74% acceptance rate and where 40% of freshman take remedial writing and 65% take remedial math, due family and financial circumstances) worked as a server, starting out in family friendly restaurants and working her way up to fancier/higher priced restaurants which paid better Itâs tough work but it gave her great people skills which she uses even today in her work as physician. D2 worked a day camp counselor, and as a birthday party assistant/server at a childrenâs museum. Her experiences also helped her develop great people skills which she still uses as a physician.
(FWIW, Medicine really isnât a âscienceâ jobâitâs a customer service job. See: Press-Ganey scores)
Not suggesting you need to work as waitstaff, but having a little of your own money will give you some independence from your family. And perhaps feeling that you have a bit more control over your life will help empower you to make choices you feel better about.
There are things you can do right now that will make your college experience better. Seek out a mentorâthis could be a professor with whom youâve taken class, a professor who youâve heard about but havenât met yet ( read up about them then go to their office hours, introduce yourself, ask them about their research/lab/areas of interest), a counselor in the health professions office, or some one else on campus.
A mentor can be invaluable. They can help open doors for you to research positions, internships, career options.
But you have to take the risk and take the first step. Youâll never know unless you ask.
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And one small addendum.
The University Near Momâevery year, it sends kids to medical school. It even sends a few to highly competitive, research-oriented medical schoolsâlike WashU, JHU and UCLA.
School is what you make of it. It doesnât determine your future success.
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Resilience and adaptability is one the 10 Core Competencies that med schools look for when making decisions about who to accept.
https://students-residents.aamc.org/media/15376/download?attachment
Resilience and Adaptability. Demonstrates tolerance of stressful or changing environments or situations and adapts effectively to them; is persistent, even under difficult situations; recovers from setbacks.
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This is something that should be engraved in stone and put in every medical school. A large part of successful medicine is skillfully managing the patient (and family). If the patient doesnât trust their MD or doesnât do what the MD tells them to do, no amount of medical knowledge or experience will be useful.
[Aside]
Physicians are not trained to be scientists, unless they also have a PhD.
[/Aside]
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Close friend is a pathologist. Virtually no âcustomerâ contact; she indeed trained as a scientist during three fellowships despite no PhD and no desire to get one. Former college roommate is a radiologist- her role requires zero patient contact (thatâs how the practice is set up) and a whole lotta number crunching, statistics, evaluating clinical trials in addition to reading slides. A relative is an oncologist; love him to pieces but I cannot imagine how brusque he must be with patients. Trained as a scientist (and continues to research, write in addition to seeing patients) and if heâs a âcustomer service repâ heâs likely a terrible one although appears to be a phenomenally successful physician.
I think yaâll can make your point about how important non-scientific training is for future MDâs without resorting to extreme hyperbole.
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@blossom Iâm going to have to disagree with you.
How many oncologists have you dealt with as a patient or a patient ally?
I can count 5 surgical oncologists, 3 radiation oncologists and 5 or 6 medical oncologists that I have had direct face-to-face interactions with over a period of months to years. (Could have be more⊠you lose count after a while.) Not a single one of them has been brusque or unsympathetic. Oncologists tend to be empathetic, sympathetic, very patient, kind and good listeners. They are tasked with delivering unimaginably bad news, with asking patients to make life or death decisions about their treatment, with asking patients to consent to being poisoned (chemotherapy, targeted therapy), burned (radiation therapy) and mutilated (surgery) all based upon their word. If they cannot approach their patients with empathy, respect and consideration, their patients are not going accept their advice.
A physician (in any specialty, not just oncologist) cannot force a patient to be compliant. They must use persuasion, empathy and approach any and all discussions from a place of understanding of the patientâs POV (even if their perspective is ill informed, uneducated, ignorant or just plain wrong). A physician must get a patient to trust them. Brusqueness, rudeness, discourteousness, paternalism, an attitude that âIâm right; youâre wrongâ or âI know whatâs best for youâ and youâve lost that trust and your patient is outta there.
A large part of medicine is customer service. Itâs customer service backed by a vast and deep fund of medical/scientific knowledge, but itâs customer service all the same.
Edited to add: the âcustomerâ for a pathologist is other physicians. Ditto for radiology. PO enough other doctors and they stop sending you their specimens and films.
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I dunno. We have been to two. The one locally was very odd. I wouldnât quite say brusque, but he would not answer any of our questions. Very dodgy. And basically, he told H to drink green tea and read a book. The one at the out of state good hospital has been wonderful!
But last week the H of a friend went to an oncologist at the local hospital. They went to the good instate hospital for the diagnosis. Itâs 2.5 hours away vs 1-1:30 for the various out of state good hospitals, but itâs all their insurance would cover. They thought they would do chemo locally to save time and money and logistics. They said the oncologist here was so condescending, rude and pessimistic, that now they are rethinking that plan. So they are definitely out there.
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Letâs please get back to the OP. Thank you!
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