<p>In the dark ages, I was a freshman at a large state university 1 1/2 hours from home without a car. About 10 of us formed a ‘family’ to walk to class with, join at the cafeteria, study etc. By the end of the first semester, I was an item with one member of that group. Some 30+years later, we are now doing the college thing with our last child ;)</p>
<p>When it comes to GFs and BFs, I think there is nothing that would really make us happy. If they have a steady (yeah I know I’m showing my age) we worry that they aren’t seeing all the opportunities available and if they have no dates, we worry that they’re going to be monks.<br>
I agree with the posters that we’re so much more involved than our parents were - you actually had to take pen to paper or line up when the rates went down with a handful of quarters at the payphone.<br>
Console yourself with the fact that in addition to all the romance, they might actually be spending more time studying! Yeah and I’m one of those people who has been married forever to the guy I met in the laundry room freshman year (and he always knew which phones on campus were broken so you could make free phone calls)</p>
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Our daughter introduced us to a new boyfriend (a senior) when we went up for our first freshman parent weekend in October 2003. Three years later, he feels very much like part of the family. We even like his parents and siblings. I’m not going to jinx things by tellng you any more, but I am starting to secretly think about the big M word.
We have definitely found this to be the case.</p>
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<p>How true. Right now I wish my son would be swept off his feet by some cute girl. Think it might make him happier with his school and give him a support person. I think guys don’t talk to guys about things they are upset about, but they will open up with a girlfriend (maybe don’t have to be macho ;))</p>
<p>I think guys don’t talk to guys about things they are upset about, but they will open up with a girlfriend (maybe don’t have to be macho )</p>
<p>I was always a sucker for guys with whom you could say * we need to talk* and they wouldnt think of something important they had to do first…in Kalispell. 
Of course, once I went out with a few of them who wouldn’t stop sharing ) including my hair gel) I went back to the strong and silent type</p>
<p>S met his girlfriend at the beginning of freshman year. I was a little surprised at how quickly it happened, but I think it’s good. She’s a wonderful girl, who we like very much. It seems better to have one nice girl than a string of casual dates to me. They seem to be very compatible, and I’m sure it provides both of them with emotional support at school.</p>
<p>I do understand some of the OP’s concern…if this is a “coping” thing, then when the crutch of GF is gone, will he be able to handle things, because maybe he hasn’t been alone to handle them</p>
<p>I have known people who don’t want to be “alone”, so they find someone right away…it may be a fine relationship, it may just be a transition one, it may be long it may be short, but whatever it is, its the couples…</p>
<p>all you can do hope for the best, and if it is too intense, taking over stuff, they both will learn soon enough,</p>
<p>For something to become so serious after such a short period of time, when most good relationships evolve with some dating, some hanging out, some getting to know each other, even in HS, most kids get to know each other through friends, getting together, etc, before it is a couple, to wonder, is valid…I mean would most of you tell your best girlfriend to get so serious with a guy she has know for 8 days…I wonder</p>
<p>It is true many people meet as freshmn, but how many are in an exclusive, joined at the hip relationship after two weeks of first arriving on campus…i would bet most toook it a bit slower</p>
<p>Maybe I’m just a foolish romantic, but I believe in love! Who knows where the OP’s son’s relationship will lead, but there’s just nothing like that first romance. </p>
<p>College kids are at nature’s perfect age for falling in love. There was a thread a while back about CC parents who met their spouse in college, and I believe there were quite a few. What better place to meet someone?</p>
<p>In any case, I am certain that most sons don’t listen to moms when it comes to matters of the heart, so my advice is to get to know the girl and be neutral about their relationship.</p>
<p>i agree there is nothing to be done, but that doesn’t mean the concerns aren’t valid…just that there isn’t much a parent can do unless sons grades start to crash, and if there is scholarship $$ on the line…even then, eh, its his life to mess up</p>
<p>My sister and her husband met at freshman registration in 1968. Still together.</p>
<p>how many here or those talking about in college, as freshman, were they so serious after a couple of weeks…just curious</p>
<p>My sister and her husband of 30+ years met in 9th grade. I met H as a sophomore, and we were married during the middle of my senior year.</p>
<p>CGM–without having asked my sister, I’m pretty sure they were dating exclusively and sleeping together by a month into college, when her (now-husband) dropped out. He didn’t go back to college until about ten years ago, too. I know my father thought he was a complete loser, but it hasn’t turned out to be true.</p>
<p>What I get from this is that while there may be something to worry about, there’s really nothing I can do, so don’t worry about it! I do agree with that. It’s also interesting to see that so many of you know people who met right away in school like that. </p>
<p>By the way, S has not had a serious girlfriend up until now, so I’m sure that is adding to my concern since he has no track record in these circumstances. But that is really my problem, not his. Thank you for the responses so far, they have been very helpful.</p>
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True that. Less stress, less drama, and a support system.</p>
<p>I don’t see this is much of an issue. Nice that he is sharing it with you. Seems happy. Things could be so much worse. I think this is better than a kid with new found freedom who just wants to hook up with a new person every week. As long as your son is meeting lots of kids and doing fine with school, I don’t see how it matters much if he met a GF at the start of the year or a few months in. I doubt he has stopped being engaged in other aspects of college life. </p>
<p>By the way, I met and started dating my husband of 29 years in October of my freshman year of college, though he was not a freshman.</p>
<p>Perhaps everyone is right that there’s not much to worry about here, and less to do, but not so sure this would be the move of choice that I’d wish on a brand new freshman, either. Dating one person exclusively from a very young age (leading to marriage) has been mentioned several times on this thread, but that seems to me to be another topic altogether. I generally think it’s a bad idea, although there are success stories out there that serve as the exceptions to the rule.</p>
<p>Don’t you wish he’d brought his teddy bear from home instead? :)</p>
<p>I would agree with many here that it is a coping mechanism some students have. There are some girls that cling to just about the first person of the opposite sex that shows interest. It eliminates one nervous aspect of college.</p>
<p>As long as it doesn’t mess up his studies and responsibilities, let it slide. Make sure he is using protection (have the money talk*) about unexpected pregnacies.</p>
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<li>the money talk is not about avoiding sex, but what unprotected sex can potentially cost in money and career choices. It’s pretty effective. It’s not emotional, it’s financial.</li>
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Yes, the “sowing one’s wild oats” theme is something I’ve heard a lot from people, when we discuss the fact that my D entered into a serious relationship right off the bat as a college freshman. I actually have a lot more respect for her, being in a deeply committed relationship over the course of three college years, than I do for my former young self–a wild hedonist and serial boinker at that stage of my life. It was a hell of a lot of fun, but I don’t know how I survived it all successfully. I think I was just lucky. If I had a daughter who was like I was when I was in college–I would jump off a bridge. Ehh, there were some really good things about me back then, too, but I would still jump, if I had ended up with a daughter like me. I have been so, so blessed as a parent, and spouse :)</p>
<p>"serial boinker "</p>
<p>:) LUCKY CHARMS OR WHEATIES?</p>