Even those of us who have been the beneficiaries of these comments can find them extremely irritating. It’s a topic of discussion on my breast cancer forum. When I was going through chemo I was pretty upbeat but I hated it when people praised me for it. All I could think was, “If I have a bad day and need to unload will my complaints be seen as evidence of moral or psychological weakness?” The worst was when people would ascribe my relatively good outcome to a good attitude. “So if I die it’s because I was a [b-word]?”
No one needs the pressure to be a Pollyanna, whether they’re facing personal tragedy or serious illness.