<p>Ok, asian :)</p>
<p>Ha! I love it. Not about the hooking up part but about the strong women focusing on themselves part. Yeah.</p>
<p>It’s refreshing that a strong, smart, ambitious, busy woman can enjoy casual sex without being labeled as “loose” or a “whore” etc. Am I right? If this is some sort of evolution, I’m all for it.</p>
<p>I’d say she’s a force to be reckoned with. ;)</p>
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<p>Who is a force to be reckoned with, and by whom? What does that mean in this context?</p>
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<p>So, if a female is “weak, average intelligence, not particularly self-motivated, but good at time management” she cannot enjoy casual sex without being labeled??? Only “A” types get a “pass?”</p>
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<p>I think women have always been able to enjoy casual sex without being labelled, if they were discreet about it. People of my generation (including me, actually), probably still think women who sleep around with a lot of different partners who they are not in a relationship with are pretty sleazy. Even my college aged Ds said the same thing to me about women who hooked-up with different guys pretty regularly and made no attempt to keep it private. Women have always had the “right” to sleep around, and onlookers have always had the “right” to have an opinion about what they are doing.</p>
<p>Commentary, and a Q&A with the author of the article, from the Public Editor’s Blog today:
[‘Sex</a> on Campus’ Writer Responds to Questions and Complaints - NYTimes.com](<a href=“http://publiceditor.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/07/16/sex-on-campus-writer-responds-to-questions-and-complaints/]'Sex”>'Sex on Campus' Writer Responds to Questions and Complaints - The New York Times)</p>
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<p>I’m actually totally with you on this. I <em>personally</em> don’t understand it (why not just use something that doesn’t actually have emotions if you want to just go through the motions)? </p>
<p>With that said, one of my best friends likes hook-ups (always with friends… never with random strangers) because she doesn’t want to actually be IN a relationship but wants some level of human contact. It works well for her and the guys so what do I care? I’m just happy she uses protection…</p>
<p>So, if a female is “weak, average intelligence, not particularly self-motivated, but good at time management” she cannot enjoy casual sex without being labeled??? Only “A” types get a “pass?”>>>>>>></p>
<p>Point taken.</p>
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I appreciate the careful wording in this post. :p</p>
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<p>I’m kinds about ^^this. More power to men and women who can enjoy sex with someone they don’t like. If they “like” random sex, then so be it. As far as “finding” a life partner, I think someone early in this thread mentioned the word compromise and IMO there is that. If you hook up or not is not relevant to whether or not you find a life partner. Some who hook up will, some who hook up won’t. Frankly the 50 year old and plus girl friends I have that never married, and given that we were all moderately intelligent and moderately ambitious and pretty much active sexually as singles, never learned or never wanted to compromise so it’s a calculated risk.</p>
<p>The key is to be “bro-choice” (hey, I didn’t make it up!)</p>
<p>[?Bro-choice</a>? students support abortion to hookup [VIDEO] | The Daily Caller](<a href=“‘Bro-choice’ students support abortion to make hookups more likely [VIDEO] | The Daily Caller”>‘Bro-choice’ students support abortion to make hookups more likely [VIDEO] | The Daily Caller)</p>
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Bro-choice. I’ve worked in reproductive rights for the better part of a decade and I’ve never heard that term. I could’ve gone the rest of my life without hearing it, too. Oy vey :rolleyes: </p>
<p>With that said, I wouldn’t sleep with someone who is pro-life either. I think it’s actually a smart decision to know whether or not your sex partner supports abortion rights before, you know, there’s a possibility of needing one.</p>
<p>I would hope women would at least have higher standards than to sleep with someone who describes themselves as “bro-choice”… but I’ve never understood the frat boy appeal either so…</p>
<p>After this girl has drunkenly hooked up with whoever suits her fancy, does she ever wonder if she’s gotten pregnant or an STD?</p>
<p>^maybe that’s why they choose a “buddy”, less things to chance. Maybe she’s kidding herself too. Maybe she is in a “relationship”, and it is just with someone she doesn’t like very much. Like no one has ever done that before. Duh.</p>
<p>I think we might be boxing ourselves in here assuming the woman doesn’t “like” her partner very much, either. Maybe it is someone she would gladly accept a date from if she was interested in dating. Maybe it’s a good friend. I think there are probably a lot more people engaging in those kinds of relationships than people who are literally just hooking up with complete random strangers never to be seen again on a regular basis. I actually have never met anybody in person who does the latter even though I know those people are out there. Just about everybody I know has at one point had a casual relationship with somebody they knew pretty well, but weren’t interested in a committed relationship. They liked them fine, and maybe in a different time or place would have pursued something more with them, but at the time that wasn’t what they were looking for.</p>
<p>You might play golf with somebody you don’t know that well, or even like that much, if he’s available to play and plays at roughly your level. Personally, I think it’s a mistake to treat a sex partner like a golf partner, but perhaps that’s the mindset some young people have.</p>
<p>All the outrage and misinformation about “hook up culture” upsets me. There are a few stats presented in the article and a few presented in this thread that show quite clearly that this is hardly the universal scene that so many are making it out to be:</p>
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<p>Many do not hook up, and most of those who do engage in it little, probably, if I may hazard to guess, early on in their freshman years. A significant percentage of the 40% of seniors who are virgins or who have only had one sexual partner likely are or have been in long term relationships. Many of the other 40% who fall between the virgin/one parter and the frequent hook up groups have likely dated as well. In fact, some of the frequent hook up people probably date too; there’s no need for these activities to be mutually exclusive. </p>
<p>People who are interested in the social scene in colleges today would be far better served by clear statistics and by actually talking to the undergrads and recent grads they know than they are by anecdotal articles like this one. </p>
<p>If my parents were to ask me about the scene at my prestigious school in the Northeast, I would tell them that among freshmen, hook ups are much more common than dating and that this seems to be the option preferred by both the guys and the girls. I would say that after that, the balance shifts more toward dating to the point where the slight majority of the junior and senior girls around me have boyfriends, and most of those without boyfriends are single and not looking, with very, very few of them still frequently hooking up. Where I am, this is the case among both the unaffiliated students and those in Greek life. It’s not unheard of for senior couples to get engaged in the spring.</p>
<p>1963 Bye, Bye Birdie</p>
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<p>Music Man 1962 (movie)
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