Octuplets' mom already has 6 young kids at home.

Parent Cafe
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<p>“It was funny to see how many moms of multiples are actually really thin”</p>

<p>I clearly remember a mom of multiple toddlers, when complimented on how fit she looked, claiming it didn’t really count because she hadn’t actually dieted or exercised— imho the sleep-deprived ravings of a woman who doesn’t realize that she hasn’t consumed enough calories for basic sustenance, or that the level of “lifting” she does daily would be pretty darn impressive for most young athletes.</p>

<p>Since you got my point about the “pervs” – if one had to choose: should Nadya do the porno or do reality tv? I realize it’s an artificial choice but I would choose the porno.</p>

<p>I really like your description of giving multiples enough time and attention. That is why I finally decided (if anyone suddenly appoints me Solomon) it doesn’t make sense for Nadya to be allowed to take them home, even with adequate professional support staff. But unless it is possible to place the babies in long term situations, it really worries me that they won’t have stable consistent loving adults in their lives. And maybe even Nadya is better than that alternative? I don’t know.</p>

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<p>“I realize it’s an artificial choice but I would choose the porno.”</p>

<p>No one’s paying any money to see me, but I have to admit…a million dollars is a lot of money for an afternoon’s work. I bet most women would at least give that offer some thought.</p>

1163

<p>Ok…what I read regarding her porno offer, is that they wanted to film her “8” different times, with “8” different men (GAG!)</p>

<p>If this is one of those choices with a gun held to my head, I think I’d have to go the porn route too, haha…not 8 times though. But, I couldn’t imagine having my daily life exposed to all that publicity and voyerism. Its creepy…but so is porn.</p>

<p>I truly don’t feel in my heart that Nadya has any clear sense that these are children, not dolls. I know thats been said before, but she is a disturbed woman. She’s obviously taking extremely good care of herself…but, she’s letting her first 6 kids live in a filthy dump. Just cause you have alot of toys in your backyard, she doesn’t strike me as the kind of woman who is making sure the toys aren’t filthy…or broken. Why isn’t she wiping the food off the walls? Those kids are probably sleeping on the floor, cause the bedrooms look to filthy to sleep in. She is so irresponsible its crazy.</p>

<p>I do think all 14 kids would be better off place in other homes. The most difficult part of that decision is how do you split them up…even thinking of doing that is so sad for all those siblings. They have a right to know one another…but, not in an environment where none of them are getting their needs met.</p>

<p>I beleive that we’ve only just started the worst part of this story. When her babies are released, there is no reason not to expect 1, 2 or more to have some disabilities. Serious ones. Again, one of my triplets is disabled and that in itself is hard to accept at times. Its so hard to see him sometimes, and wonder what his life “could” have been like. I know he had every possible treatment and therapy that was available…so, he’s made great strides. But it is an awful lot of work at times…and its very emotionally taxing in the very early years, when you are first coming to terms with your childs condition. There’s a greiving process for what may have been. It passes with time, and only rears its ugly head around milestone events. I just have one child with a disability, and when we realized that at 2 months…I thought my heart would break in half. I cried on and off for days, weeks, months, years, lol. The thought of having 3 with problems, and then having the audacity to get pregnant again, with even the 4th, is really just sickening. She clearly doesn’t have any true love for her actual children. She loves the “idea” of children.</p>

<p>And yet, I wouldn’t trade being the mom of my triplets for the world:)</p>

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<p>bulletandpima, Pre-implantation genetic diagnosis has been around for years, but it is normally used to avoid implanting embryos with inherited diseases like Tay-Sacks or sickle-cell anemia. I had not heard of it being used for selection of eye color! That is disturbing. </p>

<p>papengena, Thank you for your insights into the world of multiple births. You have really gone through so much. I hope your husband is doing well?</p>

<p>Even if Nadya had 6 million dollars in cash, it is hard to imagine how she would reproduce what Angels in Waiting offered to her. And she doesn’t have a huge wad of money - the Angels in Waiting arrangement would have made possible donations that were restricted to care of the infants. I think that many more people would have donated this way.</p>

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<p>Thanks for asking NYMom…he seems to be feeling a little better each day. The adjustment in meds helped. He has an appt towards the end of the month with the heart transplant center…though, he is not a candidate for that just yet. One Day at A Time, and we’re hanging in. I do like it much better having him home, where I can keep an eye on him, lol.</p>

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<p>papengena: best wishes and luck to you with all the stresses you seem to have going on.</p>

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<p>I admit that when I recently ran across a baby picture of one of my girls nekked- at about 4 months- I wasn’t sure at first who it was. I think if I had , had pictures of both of them next to each other it would have been easy to tell the difference- but given that at that age younger D was most likely crying, if she wasn’t sleeping or nursing, I gave myself some slack for not recognizing her right away.</p>

<p>Re gestation- how long was this pregnancy?
My oldest was a premie- and a singleton- born at 30 weeks SGA- ( she tied her cord into three knots and I had a c-section to take her out- I wasn’t in labor) She is doing well now, but it was hard and she had some delays ( there are also things that are a result of her premature delivery that may cause problems even now)</p>

<p>The children need an advocate- appointed by the court- IMO, to represent their interests, because their mother- is not able to have the perspective that would allow her to put their needs first.</p>

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<p>The professional hospital photos of my third and fourth child are interchangeable. I can tell them apart by remembering the outfits worn and by the faintest of hint of a birthmark that no one else would notice. I’ve always wondered how parents of identical twins can tell them apart when they are brand new. A friend of mine with identical twins said it was actually very difficult for a very long time.</p>

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<p>I can understand Nadya’s not being able to identify the octuplet twins. I can’t understand her not being able to identify the other 6 octuplets. Preemies and infants don’t all look alike.</p>

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<p>From being in a mothers of multiples “club” when my kids were small, I remember that many of the moms of identical twins color coded the kids in the early days. Some would paint a toenail on one twin, most just used clothes in specific colors for each baby. I even did that for the first year, lol. Going out, they’d all be in the same or similar outfit in 3 diff colors. The toenail thing was a way to be sure you didn’t mix them up after baths. I’m guessing Nadya has color and letter codes for each baby. But I guess if she was looking at them from pictures and couldn’t see the color or letter related to each baby, she could get mixed up. After all, she really doesn’t spend all that much time with each one individually, does she?</p>

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<p>I can fully understand her not being able to differentiate the twins. No excuse for not being able to differentiate the other 6. Preemies do not all look alike any more than other babies all look alike.</p>

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<p>"Nadya Suleman is getting ready to move into a new house, and bring her babies home, albeit to a brood of jealous siblings.</p>

<p>“The house is on a cul-de-sac. It’s safe. It’s about 2,800 square feet, four bedrooms. I don’t want anyone to know where we are. I have trust issues. I know there are a lot of emotionally disturbed people,” Suleman said in the first of a series of exclusive blog posts for Radaronline.com.</p>

<p>The video portion of the blog, live as of 9 a.m. ET on March 3, shows Suleman struggling to speak as one of her older six kids bites her, pulls her hair and slaps her in the face. Suleman said her older children are already jealous of the octuplets. When a friend showed the kids a picture of their new siblings, “they hit the picture,” Suleman said."
[Octomom?s</a> original 6 already jealous of new 8 - The Scoop- msnbc.com](<a href=“http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29470728/]Octomom?s”>http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29470728/)</p>

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<p>wonderful. now the older kids may bite and slap their new baby siblings ?</p>

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<p>Wow. Who knew collagen injected lips was an inheritable trait?</p>

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<p>My boys are 7 years apart. Obviously, with that much difference in age, they never looked alike at the same time. But if I look at pictures of them side by side at the same age, it is very difficult to tell them apart other than by the clothes they were wearing, or if they were smiling (S2 has dimples). This lasted until age 8 or 9.</p>

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<p>This is an interesting article about why Nadya drives us crazy, which I think relates to this thread on CC:</p>

<p>[The</a> Real Reasons Octomom Drives Us Crazy | Newsweek Culture | Newsweek.com](<a href=“http://www.newsweek.com/id/187344]The”>The Real Reasons Octomom Drives Us Crazy)</p>

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<p>The article ^ says

I, for one, have never felt that way. I am concerned that a woman with multiple mental health issues is the legal parent of so many kids and that her irrational behavior affects the lives of so many people. I continue to be interested in this story because I want to hear the “happy ending” part about how the kids wind up in good environments with good parenting, whether separately or together.</p>

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<p>Thanks for the link soozievt. I am outraged with the doctor, sympathetic towards a woman who imho should have been protected from herself, and very concerned about all the children. To protect the children without some level of support for the mom seems impossible, regardless how justifiably angry that makes people. My fascination with the story will continue as we see how society responds to this really extraordinary situation.</p>

<p>I am very skeptical of what I read but if it is true that the doctor continued to provide her IVF as a means of improving the success rate of the clinic, imho the doctor should be responsible for supporting the children. However, it is doubtful he has the means, again mho. fwiw</p>

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<p>And thanks to Northstarmom for all the links you are posting.</p>

<p>Does it change anyone’s mind at all about Nadya if the doctor actually encouraged or pressured inappropriate IVF? If we are in agreement that her actions indicate possible mental incompetence or at the very least really poor decision making skills?</p>

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<p>I still think the bulk of the criticism needs to be aimed at the doctor. Nadya might have wanted to collect children as if they were beanie babies, but the idea of a doctor implanting 6 embryos is abhorrent. No reputable doctor does so. </p>

<p>I think the discussion of her previous children and her financial status are red herrings. If Nadya had been Mrs. Bill Gates, and didn’t have any children, and presented to an infertility doctor, the doctor STILL should not have implanted 6 embryos. It wouldn’t make the situation one bit better.</p>