<p>My daughter is one of the youngest in her senior class (won’t be 18 until the end of September). She had no academic or social problems. The only problems arise when she doesn’t understand why I am against her driving after 11pm (state law) when none of her friends have that restriction (since they’re older).</p>
<p>My daughter will be a 16 year old Senior until the end of January, took AP Calc AB last year. Her IQ is in the top 1% so she’s always needed more challenge. Unfortunately last year (the important Junior year) she reached her tipping point, dropped her GPA (despite her valient efforts). Problem 1) She feels she “fits” socially with her grade…but I sense some (social) insecurity on her part. Perhaps time (or therapy) will help that 2) I KNOW she would be at the top of her class if she hadn’t skipped (what were we thinking?). Now she’s going into her Senior year with a lower GPA and more pressure. She’s scaling back her coursel load so she doesn’t “break” and can enjoy learning again. Will colleges “see” her accomplishments in light of her age?</p>
<p>My son has a very late April birthday and was also one of the youngest in his class but the tallest reaching 6’4" by 10th grade. Thankfully, he did the full IB diploma and that went into a 13th year so he is going off to college at 19. He has been travelling on his own for awhile, no curfew this year and is ready…such a pleasant guy!</p>
<p>Tsky – it seems to me that you have your priorities somewhat skewed. I assume that your daughter is passing her courses – but simply that the GPA has fallen from whatever near-perfect standard you had come to expect from your daughter’s past performance. At the same time you say that your daughter feels she fits socially with her grade level, although you are not so sure.</p>
<p>By skewed priorities I mean that when you decided initially to advance your daughter - whenever that was - you were probably looking at issues like academic readiness & wanting to keep your daughter stimulated & challenged at school – not so much GPA. Now, when she is entering her senior year, you are focused on the GPA, not the level of interest/challenge. So I think you need to recognize that it is unfair to view it as a failure if the grade-advanced kid can’t sustain a position at the top of the class. Academic “fit” doesn’t always mean being on top.</p>
<p>I do think you are mistaken to assume that her age is causing the problem – she could as easily be an 18 year old going through the doldrums or hitting her stress limits. My daughter is normal age for her grade - a 17 year old junior - but all her friends are in the class ahead of her, and she got senioritis right along with them this spring. Also, my daughter is in a very serious, and I think age-appropriate, relationship with an 18 year old boy friend that started this year - and they are doing what youngsters do at that age and spending too much time gazing into each others’ eyes and not enough time studying. These are the types of hurdles that come along in any kid’s life. </p>
<p>I don’t think that the colleges will give your daughter the benefit of the doubt because of her age --I think they will treat her the same as any other applicant. So you and she may need to revise the college list somewhat, to add some more safeties to the mix. </p>
<p>That’s not necessarily a bad thing - it will lead to your daughter thinking more about issues of college fit rather than focusing on the most competitive schools - and I think in the long range will result in her making a better choice. I myself was grade-advanced, twice - and ended up at college at age 16. I chose a state university that was definitely a “match” for me, not a reach – and it would have been a safety if I hadn’t been applying from out of state. Not the most challenging environment in the world. But it gave me exactly what I needed at that age – an environment with almost limitless options and choices academically, but also space to explore and grow up during my 4 years as a student. I’m very glad I didn’t aspire to a more challenging environment, because I ended up with a strong GPA and attended one of the nation’s top law schools – so I found challenge (and prestige) enough at age 20.</p>
<p>Personally, I am pretty young in my class. (will be a senior this year and turn 17 in november) and it hasn’t affected me. If anything, I think it has been for the best. I’m 2nd in my class now, on my way to 1st. :)</p>
<p>(The reason I’m young is that I went to private kindergarten and got upgraded when I went to public school.)</p>
<p>My son skipped kindergarten and his senior year, landing himself in college at age 16. I tried to resist both moves, but the kid has always been stubborn. (I remember the great diaper strike of his second year: he refused to wear cloth diapers anymore, insisting on the most expensive brand in the store. “No cloth, Mom. Disposables!” This from a kid who was half my height.)</p>
<p>That said, I think he was right. He wanted to skip kindergarten because he thought a class full of people who couldn’t read would be boring; he wanted to skip senior year because there weren’t any more courses to take, really. “Why take AP courses when I could just go to college?”</p>
<p>When he was in 9th grade, all of his friends were seniors. I couldn’t figure it out until I hung around while they were talking. One, he could get them to drive him anywhere, and two, they were all serious nerds, and my son could definitely keep up. (He also went sailing regularly with several 18-year-old girls, wonderful young women, who liked him because he carried stuff and didn’t mind doing anything, as long as he got to sail.)</p>
<p>In our area the cut-off is Sept. 1 and D was Oct and S November. They went to private school, and a lot of kids, especially boys, were held back if born May or later. That meant my kids were not particularly old, but were certainly not young compared to their peers. S started a new boarding school as a repeat junior last fall after some behavior “issues” as a soph/junior. The new school wants kids for at least two years. He will turn 19 in November of his senior year. This has benefited him in many ways. He is focused, mature and got an extra year to work on his sport. His roommate, also a top athlete, is just a little younger and also came to this school as a repeat junior. It was not the way we expected things to work, but it is OK. You just do what you need to do.</p>
<p>My oldest children have November and December birthdays. When we lived in IL, the cut off for Kinder was September 1st. So they started out among the oldest in their classes. When we moved to Texas to a much less rigorous district, we advanced them both one year. (they each went from 5th to 7th grade) so they became younger than most of their classmates. It never really came up though. Now, going to college, there are so many that have either advanced, or attended school in December 31 cut-off zones that they will be in the middle from what I can tell.</p>
<p>When my D began kindergarten, we considered advancing her, but then decided that so many people in the late 80s were holding their kids back for an advantage that it would be unfair. Later when she moved to a private high school, we decided to advance her. Socially, she was fine, academically she was fine, but I must say, since she went to a private school which was extremely rigorous and competitive academically, she would have been more of a star and built more confidence had she been in her “normal” grade. That being said, it was the right thing socially, she is 19 and finished with 3 years of university, set to graduate on time (4 years) from a state flagship with a double major. So, she has done fine. She herself commented that it would have been an advantage to fight for the top 5 spots, if she had not skipped. Other than that she successfully took the hardest class loads and was in the toughest classes and did fine. She also competed on varsity sports. She also agrees she was glad to be done with high school- the politics were just not her thing. Interestingly, she had friends a grade behind her who were more than a year older than her!</p>
<p>My other D began in a December cut-off area, then we moved to a September cut-off area, with a fall birthday, she was younger than every one. She also has skipped a grade and is socially in the right spot and academically, too.</p>
<p>In many ways it is an individual decision. In the case of my other kid, there was no way we would skip her. It simply was not right and that was the righty decision. If my older one had wanted to enjoy the high school glory, it would not ahve been right to skip her, but she wanted to move on and finsih up, she’s in a hurry to get on with life.</p>
<p>I think the social aspect may be more important than the academic.</p>
<p>Somemom, I think you have it right with the social aspect being more important than the academic. And every kid is different! As an educator, I have seen a 16 year old (a boy) go off to Stanford and be able to skip the freshman year at college and totally enjoy the experience. I have seen a 16 year old (a girl) graduate, do reasonably well academically and hang around home for a few more years. Both kids were Indian nationals. I have seen kids pushed ahead to fall back later on. It really depends. And if a kid is really not having a great high school experience which is not so unusual (especially in the states) then why not let them move on. If a kid needs a little bit more growing up time why not “repeat” a year or take a gap year. Whatever. In the grand scheme of things having them achieve personal success is what it is all about. And twenty years down the line, it is social skills and self-concept that will make all the difference.</p>
<p>I was young and my D was, too. When she was in pre-K, I talked to her teacher about holding her back. She laughed and said if she were held back, then everyone should be. I wasn’t worried about academics, but the social aspect. I sent her to school, and she was one of only 5 kids chosen for the GT program for 1st grade - again, I talked to the teacher, because the 1st and 2nd graders were together, and since there were only 5 1st graders, they were outnumbered by the older kids, some 2 yrs older than D, because she was a young 1st grader. Teacher said not to worry, she watched the younger kids closely and if she felt there was a problem, she would let me know. Skipping grades was not an option in our district in TX, since they had the GT program and accelerated classes. D was still bored at times, but feels she got a great foundation at the same time creative thinking. The GT program was wonderful - different topic each year, doing research, etc. - mummies, aerospace engineering, art history, etc. As to her social skills, I ws worried because she was abit of a loner, but did develop close friendships with 4 other girls that went through school together K-12, and are still close. Never popular, but she wouldn’t have been even if she were older. She never cared about being popular, because she didn’t want to do what it took to be that. She is an individual, doesn’t care about peer pressure, and always did her own thing. She is the only one of the 5 leaving the state and not going to one of the state unis. Being younger never made a difference to her. She excelled in school - sal, and became her own person. That wouldn’t have been different whether I held her back or not. It depends on the child.</p>
<p>Both of my kids are among the youngest in their classes. I was advised to hold them back, especially “the boy”, because the school felt that kids with spring or summer birthdays had a high risk of failure and would be a disruption in class. Well, I sent them anyway, because they could get nothing more out of another year in nursery school. There was a noticable difference in maturity up until about 2nd or 3rd grade, but after that there was no social or emotional detriment. Early on, it was also evident which kids had older siblings by their more “worldly” behavior. Academically, they are both at the top of their classes.</p>
<p>I think the trend to hold kids back to insure academic or athletic advantage is alarming. Pity the elementary school teacher of a class with an age span of two years or more. In our case, sending our kids to school at the prescribed time worked out well.</p>
<p>Most of our classes have age spans of two years. When kids come from all over the world they come from various cultural backgrounds, and various school starting times. It works out fine, good!</p>
<p>I certainly can see your point overseas, but our community and neighboring communities are not so internationally diverse. In fact, they are downright homogenous. It is very common around here for parents to hold their kids back from starting kindergarten for no reason other than to have a relative age and size advantage. I have noticed that the age for school entry is getting older and older. Thirty years ago, everyone whose kid was 4 years and 9 months old (December birthday) sent them to kindergarten. Then it was only if the kid was 5 by September 1st. The date of “normal” entry birthdays has crept back through the summer and spring months. Now, some parents don’t want their kids to start school unless their birthday is before January. (Maybe they will never get into HYP or be the football captain if the parents make the wrong decision…LOL!) I just think that the pressure to gain a relative advantage in the classroom and in sports starts way too soon. It’s a snowball effect, and it makes it difficult for parents who want to enroll their children at the “normal” time, because it’s a sure bet that the playing field will not be level.</p>
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<p>Well my parents have advanced me twice, so I’m the youngest in my grade. I don’t have a lot of friends really, but I don’t think that’s age-related or anything. My friends are the people in my classes, etc, and are usually smart and motivated–the kind of ppl I should be around. Now, though, my dad wants me to take a gap year or something or a PG year at a boarding school, and I feel like I’ve “earned” the right to go to college. So I see no prob being the youngest, but my parents obviously see it as a self-created handicap.</p>
<p>I find myself wondering if the increasing age of kindergarten entry might have something to do with the increasing numbers of high school students taking AP courses. There are several people on here with 19-year-old seniors. I can’t help wondering if being “the right age” for kindergarten now means you’re too old for high school.</p>
<p>In many countries, vocational and job education starts at 16, while only those expecting to attend college continue on.</p>
<p>In NY the cut off in Dec 31. My younger son was Nov, my neighbors daughter was Oct. Both children were small and petite for their age and looked a year younger. My son was tested and found to have a high IQ but he was very immature in my opinion. The school argued for me to keep in his proper grade and I went before a school board to petition for an extra year (public pre-school - a head start program). My district prides itself on getting loads of money for “help” for kids who lag behind in their grade and they were telling my if my son ever need resources they were there. I was at my wits end, until I sat down on one of my final private interviews with the district psycologist and explained about my 2 male cousins who were late bloomers with late birthdays who were taunted in school unmercifully (back in the day when bullies were ignored) who both committed suicide. I also found some sort of study done on late birthday teens who had high suicide rates. The psychologist heard my sad family history, and I was allowed to hold back my son and I haven’t regretted it. One of his friend was a whole year younger mature socially, but weak academically is being recommended next year for our districts alternative school where many late birthday kids end up who cannot compete with the AP, Honors and very competive kids in the top 20 ranking HS that my kids go to.
Getting back to my neighbors child. My neighbor was foreign born and had implicit trust in the school system. She kept her daughter in the proper grade. As a result, her child was given resource help. I babysat her often - my older son was one grade younger. When they did thier homework, she struggled, so I switched homework one day, I gave her my sons homework and I gave him hers. She was really happy doing the homework from the grade behind her and completed it beautifully. I tried to explain to her mother that her daughter did not need help, just hold her back a grade but she didn’t know how to go about doing it, being from another country. The other kids started tormenting her, and not having the social skills to deal effectively she lashed out phyisically. She asked her mom over and over, why was she so slow in getting the academic material. She was put on a watch list and eventally was asked to leave the middle school and go into an area school for problem students. At 15 she was recommended to go to an overnight school. I don’t know the details, this was kept quiet, but sadly she committed suicide at the school. I am very very sad about this. I blame my fancy school district. But I want to get this story out in the open. If you have a child who is stuggling or is a fragile and easily hurt child and is the youngest in the grade, you may want to look into giving the child an extra year especially if both academics and social skills are involved. You know whats best for your child, do not let others tell you to move them ahead or keep them back. Its an individual thing.</p>
<p>dmd, in many countries kids go 13 years to graduate from secondary school as they complete IB and A levels. Also in many countries they graduate and go directly into military service and end up starting university at 21.</p>
<p>I have a daughter and 2 sons. My daughter was born in late July, and always was one of the youngest in her class. She is very bright, though, graduating at the top of her class. </p>
<p>Her brother was born in September, four years later, and because of the genetics, we figured (correctly) that he had little chance of getting very tall. Because he is athletic, unlike DD, I truly think he benefitted from us holding him back. I think he fit in well with the kids in the grade ahead of him as well as with his current grade, but I have no doubt that we did the right thing for him in letting him start K at nearly six rather than nearly five. He graduated at the top of his class, too.</p>
<p>In the case of second son, he was held back for social advancement reasons, though he has a June birthday and could have gone ahead. He is very bright, but I think he has benefitted socially from beginning K when he was six. Some of it is dumb luck as the kids in S2’s class are a lot more like him than in the class ahead of him.</p>
<p>Overseas, I agree that many countries have 13 years of pre-university education. However, if you look closely at those countries, you’ll often find that they do an earlier sort for who goes into that university track and who goes into the vocational track. The UK and Germany both fall into that classification, for example, with extensive testing at 15 to 16.</p>