Parents of the HS Class of 2009 (Part 1)

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
29801

<p>Little bit of excitement around here. Relaxing at home last night, talking to D, idly browsing the on-line newspaper headline to check tomorrow’s weather. But there’s a banner: Apartments being evacuated in the vicinity of XXX ABC Street due to flooding. I live precisely (to the house number) downhill of XXX ABC Street by about 150 feet. </p>

<p>And, look outside & lots of emergency equipment out on ABC street. (Rather pretty in the very light snow.) So we got into the woolies and walked on over.</p>

<p>Turns out that one of the ditches (that’s how we transport water around here) above XXX ABC street got blocked, was overflowing, and they were afraid the ditch embankment might let go…but they found the gate that was blocked, unlocked it, and all was now safe, though I’m guessing the parking lot is a complete ice rink. On a healthy slope. But just for a little bit, I’m thinking – a flood? In January? With 2" of snow? And I was on the phone – and let’s just say that the phone call with D terminated rather promptly. (But not before I heard that the concert lineup for Coachella is amazing…though being there in the kind of heat they’ll have in April sounds like nothing short of a trip to hell to me. Guess I’m not 22 any more.)</p>

29802

<p>hello everyone, I’m back from the city and trying to catch up at home, at work and on cc.
Trip was fun, we visited the Frick collection as well as the Morgan library ( so glad S likes to do things like that, H & D not so much). Speaking of D, we had dinner with D and her bf at a very nice French place on Sat night. S and I also took a food tour on Sun. I highly recommend food tours. PM me if you want more info. It was all fun ,but tiring.</p>

<p>Oregon - glad you are ok.
RM I hope your knee stops hurting.
Kmc so sorry to hear about your H’s diagnosis.
Missy pie - I was wondering how it would go with your S. Is it possible for you to talk with one of her kids? Such a difficult situation.</p>

<p>I read about our friend Sunriseeast, haven’t posted yet but want to thank her S for letting us know. So sad. I continue to keep her and family in my prayers.</p>

29803

<p>Mom just talked to someone with the State insurance system who said that the COBRA benefit description was a required notice and that there are survivors benefits and her actual premiums will be much lower. How dare they scare old people like that!</p>

<p>A million thanks to arabrab who sent me a lot of valuable info by PM and generally talked me off the ledge.</p>

29804

<p>^^^ Don’t you love the help and support we can find here!? You are a good woman, arabrab!</p>

<p>Glad you feel better missypie.</p>

29805

<p>My goodness Missy, it is so hard to be the person with it all together. How muchmore do you need to take on. I feel that way with my brother. almost punished for living a “normal” life</p>

<p>Glad you got some great advice here.
I am so frustrated re the diet and exersize I dont eat a ton, but really could maintain my smaller weight on 1200 calories, am on meds ie tamoxifen anyway with this second episode of bronchitis am once again sideline due to the inability to breath and fatigue. I am beyond frustrated, I like to work out it helps my mind.
We are cutting down on gluten, I make a snack bar wth chex which is gluten free. some people are allergic, some sensitive, and some intolerant. D2 has may issues , didnt Elisabeth hasselback write a cookbook,? but I am sure you could find many recipes on line
Re thelake house we wanted to replace the vanity in the bathroom, when we saw how the plumbing had been stretched rerouted, we decided to hold off. NM are you keeping the bathtub in bathrooms? I keep thinking we should just keep the shower.</p>

29806

<p>dte…three smalish bathrooms with walk in showers but only the master has a tub. Kept it for future little ones. Yes, Elizabeth Hasselback did write a gluten free cookbook. There are many gluten free food blogs online. So many recipes and ideas! I have book club tonight at the neighbors and one of the members has Celiac disease so we always have gluten free apps. Don’t even miss the regular apps.</p>

29807

<p>DTE, is the chex bar recipe the one with peanut butter? (I can’t imagine what else would hold it all together.) I am becoming very intolerant to peanuts, too. I always liked to eat snack bars, protein bars, etc. but so many of them have nut products.</p>

29808

<p>I’m not a praying person, but in yoga class, we often send thoughts (karmic rays?) out to those who need it at the end of class. I can try SunriseEast or her family at the next class. Do you think it will work for people I don’t know at all?</p>

<p>Just having a blast at my work. Signed up one of the largest search firm in the world as a new client plus an institutional money management firm this week (though I started talking to both months ago). A third client asked for more work after a year and, more work on one of my high profile but hush hush *pro bono[i/] projects.</p>

29809

<p>Saw any prayers help. They are having an online gathering for sunrise at 10pm I believe. am lighting a candle, I am hoping to ake oit until 10 but not sure.
Our lake cottage has 1.5 bathrooms. 3bedrooms and a strange galley kitchen. it is something we all love though, although H 's family loves it a bit too much, he is very good at sharing ut they are a bit possesive. is convinced his sister is nice to him because of it. We are replacing the siding and roof this spring. We have replaced the windows. We till rent it tlong time tenants so we dont put high end things in it, but soon…</p>

29810

<p>

</p>

<p>Shaw, I think that CC exists, and all of us originally sought out info here, so that hopefully decades from now, our kids will be able to say the same thing!</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>A whole lot of thoughts about death lately. So much loss. I need to work out tonight, but will probably finish the thank you notes and try to find some escapist TV to watch. For some reason, cancer boggles my mind the most. It’s not old age catching up with you. It’s not something you “catch”. It can just start all by itself and end a life way too soon.</p>

29811

<p>We have never rented but H’s parents used to give it to people in their church that they didn’t even know! Gave it to the youth group once and they destroyed some of our girls’ things and then didn’t replace them. Once it was a brand new floating island that we gave D2 for her birthday. Had it one weekend and then they put a hole in it that couldn’t be repaired. After we bought the place his parents asked us at the end of summer if another group from their church (that they don’t even belong to) could use the cabin for a week! We said no and not to ask anymore. Harsh but we used it every weekend and there just aren’t that many nice summer weekends here in MN.</p>

29812

<p>Once again, I’ve fallen behind, but life has gotten so busy these days …</p>

<p>Kudos to cq’s daughter (and all the others I’ve missed!) D1 is working on a paper which, if it’s accepted, she gets to read in Venice! And her prof/advisor’s funds will cover it. </p>

<p>But the best news is that after some extremely painful (and disillusioning) tussles with her advisor on previous papers, she’s gotten nothing but praise from her on this one. Small victories.</p>

<p>My mom and dad live on a street where a lot of filming gets done. They always complain, because they have trucks, cars, catering vans, trailers, etc. parked on the street for days sometimes. This time, the company wanted to put a crane in their front yard! As my mom (84 years old) opened her mouth to complain, the company gave her a $500 check. So now my parents are watching them film a car crash scene in The Mentalist (I’ve never seen it, have you?) and feeling compromised but happy.</p>

29813

<p>Hi Z! Have missed you too! :slight_smile:
Just back from book club. Great discussion and great wine. More in the morning! ;)</p>

29814

<p>Zetesis, I love The Mentalist. Simon Baker is SO cute! That is cool about the filming.</p>

29815

<p>I had a breakdown today. Or maybe it was an epiphany. And I think I will credit Sunriseast for saving my sanity. (If indeed it is saved) </p>

<p>today I spent time re-reading a lot of Sunrise’s posts and I came upon one written shortly after Hurricane Sandy about her mom. I can’t really define what switched in me, but I called H in tears and told him I just didn’t think I could do all that needed to be done and do any of it successfully. The insanity of what I (we) were about to willingly subject ourselves to became crystal clear.</p>

<p>I have two children who will graduate college in May. We have a daughter who is playing a DI sport who may or may not continue playing in the years to come. My oldest daughter is getting married and my mother is very likely keeping death at bay just to attend. There’s more, but those are the bullets. H called the realtor and explained that given all that is on our plates, we underestimated. I underestimated. I cannot drive myself crazy for the next two or three weeks getting this house on the market when in reality that will be just the beginning! Beyond the showings and feedback, we still need to live in this house and/or travel away from it all spring. And then there’s the goal itself… Selling the place. But what if it sells and I am expected to pack the entirety into boxes, find a new place to live or even put it all in storage at the same time as the rest? And this, of course, says nothing about really really wanting to drop at least 10 pounds before I even start trying on MOB dresses! </p>

<p>I read sunrise’s posts today and realized fully that life is just too damn short. I will be shortchanging every other thing on our calendar this spring just to accommodate the one thing that doesn’t have to be on the calendar at all! Yep… epiphany. </p>

<p>I will continue to work with the stager on my own dime to knock off the things that need to get done, but I will do them on MY schedule and not make myself endlessly available. And HOPEFULLY it will all come together before I leave for the nook (and the wedding) and maybe we will put the for sale sign in the yard so if it does sell, any closing dates won’t conflict with monumental life events. And I can also tell you this much, I did not have a surgery intended to make me look less tired just to end up looking completely and utterly exhausted for real!! </p>

<p>While it puts our life back into limbo somewhat (vs thinking we’re finally moving on to SOMEWHERE), we realized today that the stress of doing too much at once can only result in sucking the joy from the rest. </p>

<p>I admit I feel like a failure in not being able to rise to the challenge I set for myself, and if I am truly honest, I rarely ever accomplish what I set out to do in full. I might rationalize that it is what it is or I did the best I could. But driving myself (and everyone around me) crazy cannot be an option, especially if I want to be still married at the end of it. All I really know for sure is that it’s an emotional business packing up a house you’ve lived in for over 20 years even when you are no longer emotionally attached to the house itself. It will get done, but wanting to sell this house is not going to be the competition to my taking the time to stand back to admire my life’s work and our biggest investments: our kids and their success.</p>

<p>I have never had a “career.” I’ve always been a stay at home mom. And in this first year of the empty nest, I think I felt I had to hurry up and get on with it now that I’m “done.” But today I hit a wall… Sunriseeast is dying. She is leaving her sons and will never have the opportunity to be truly present for her kids again. And my mother is dying… and no matter how difficult that relationship has been, she too was a stay at home mother and I should have a lot more compassion for her than I do. </p>

<p>Tomorrow’s to-do list: Getting hair cut and colored. Having my nails done (haven’t had a manicure since before Christmas) and looking to book a flight to visit my mom when D’s team is within driving distance. I might even check out the work out thread!</p>

<p>Sorry for the ramble folks… I think the net/net here is that I really must have felt the need to prove something… but my being a stressed out ***** shouldn’t be one of them. :)</p>

29816

<p>Great realization, Moda. You may have to do it all, but you don’t have to do it all at once. [And, you may not have to do it all, either].</p>

<p>It was a funny day. ShawD called, overwhelmed. She got up at 5 or so to get to a hospital for clinicals starting at 7, got back to a school next to hers for a dance class, and had a presentation for her winter term project tonight (or tomorrow night) and had to study for a quiz tomorrow and just couldn’t complete some of life’s littler details. So, ShawWife and I drove in, had a nice dinner in a Japanese restaurant near her house without ShawD who was studying, took care of the key errand, and drove home. ShawSon requested my help. He’s taking an independent study at a neighboring school that is more hands-on/touchy-feely whereas his school is holier-than-though liberal arts. [Nothing practical shall ever pass our way – and if it does, we won’t give you credit for it]. So, he had to write a description of the independent study that met the needs of both schools and wanted my advice.</p>

29817

<p>Hugs, Moda. I support your decision 100% (not that you need my approval). </p>

<p>Shawbridge, glad you could support your kids yesterday. Funny about ShawSon’s challenge! Hope he was able to manage that fine line!</p>

<p>D is so happy right now. Being accepted for the conference at spring break is amazing. Her job she’s had at a retail store was supposed to go until this weekend (store is closing), but during the winter break they ran out of merchandise and closed early. She had worked there enough to be given a generous severance package, so she doesn’t need to work this spring. And she’s taking a lighter academic load, with one required class, and two “just for fun” classes.</p>

<p>Zetesis, I hope your D gets to present her paper in Venice. My D toured Venice on her own last spring while studying abroad, and thoroughly enjoyed it. She brought me back some beautiful Venetian glass earrings. Glad your parents are being compensated for their “crane and suffering”!</p>

<p>NorthMinnesota, your book club and wine sounds like a perfect way to spend an evening!</p>

29818

<p>Hugs, Moda, and btw, great decision! Just enjoy that nest, now empty, really revel in it for a spell before you say goodbye to it :wink: You have an awesome year ahead. Enjoy that too!</p>

<p>Gotta run but wanted to check in. More ater.</p>

29819

<p>I love your post, moda. I could relate to so many of the lines that you wrote (different situations, but similar thoughts). Hugs to you. </p>

<p>c_q - Congrats to your D! Such an incredible opportunity and reward for her hard work. (I was meaning to say this before and somehow missed).</p>

29820

<p>Moda, sounds like a good decision. My mother spent about a year on getting rid of stuff before she moved to her retirement community and I remember how exhausting it was for her.</p>

<p>Z, the paper and potential trip to Venice sound great. </p>

<p>shaw, your choice of words about your job (“having a blast”) made me think about the last time I would have used that description for anything in my life. The answer is never. I may do activities that are relaxing or interesting or satisfying, but not much rises to entertaining, much less uproarious fun. I can’t even imagine what would give me that feeling, which of course now becomes a challenge because I do enjoy thought exercises and consider my imagination to be well developed. I’m going to try to figure out something to do that I could look back on and say, that was fun. Does anybody else struggle with finding fun?</p>