<p>Both S1 and S2 have major exams today. S2 got an A on his calc II exam and is feeling confident about physics but is concerned about CS. I think he is trying, but he also admits he struggles with procrastination and I think his concept of effort is still less than what it may need to be in certain courses. S1 is more disciplined, so I don’t worry about his results; he will always do whatever it takes to make at least a B. He doesn’t really go for an A, however, unless it just happens. He just finished reading Outliers and is reading MindSet right now and enjoying it.</p>
<p>Moda, I’ll keep my fingers crossed that your S makes the team. Good luck with your resolution on less contact. I know I would find that to be hard.</p>
<p>NorthMinnesota, I think one thing you can do for your daughter is to help steer her towards a career/workplace where she will advance based on her own merit, rather than through self-promotion or politicking. Workplaces that require a lot of strategy to get ahead are not usually the best for the quiet competent type.</p>
<p>They absolutely do…but often the competent ones who actually make sure the work is done right bring home a lot less money than the ones who have schmoozed their way to the top.</p>
<p>I think there are clear areas in which technical competence can be measured and in such areas, quiet competent folks are more likely to be rewarded well than in areas such as sales or companies in which corporate political skills matter a lot. In the good old days, really competent folks who did bond modeling on Wall Street were paid about $400K if I remember correctly. Even there, the folks who sold the services could make a lot more. However, rising in any large organization, the balance of what matters shifts from technical competence to a combination of political skill and self-promotion because getting stuff done at a high level involves at the very least producing through other people. Tax law and/or tax accounting might be areas in which there need not be a great managerial structure to climb and technical competence is likely to be rewarded. What areas were you thinking about missypie?</p>
<p>Same in the law. The folks who are able to bring in the business, even if they don’t do a bit of the work themselves, make a boatload of money. The worker bees make a lot less BUT even the legal worker bees make more money than workers in areas like social services, most academics, etc.</p>
<p>Most of us have knowledge about our profession and maybe a few others. That is why it is good to talk to our kids about the skills required to succeed in the professions we know about, then to encourage them to talk to other seasoned adults about the professions they know. A person interested in the banking industry may have the personality to be a fabulous credit analyst but would be a terrible relationship manager. To a college student, working in a bank may be working in a bank.</p>
<p>I have absolutely no clue what my son has in his mind to do when he grows up. None whatsoever. I am sure it will come into focus eventually, but at this point I think we’re mostly happy that he goes to class!! :)</p>
<p>BEAUTIFUL day here today – for the tundra, that is. Am off to go walking around the lakes.</p>
<p>NMN, the other thing to remember is that your daughter may surprise you and change as her goals change. I was terminally shy in HS and recall being really scared to call people I didn’t know or people in authority including my advisor in grad school to ask them for something. After a professorship, I took a job first as an investment banker and then working for a wealthy family’s investment company. The father of the family sat down with me and said, “Here’s what I’m expecting from you. We’ve made a lot of money doing XXX. It’s getting tougher to make money doing that. I want you to find us some other areas in which we can make good returns.” One thing I chose to do was to lay out for him a plan to get better deal flow by finding other family firms and investment funds that would share deals with us. I chose to do it because it involved cold-calling. So, this forced me to call people I didn’t know and ask for stuff. Then, to those that responded positively, I would fly out and meet them for lunch and discuss possibilities. This didn’t play to my strengths, but I no longer have problems calling people any more and do it all the time. I knew I’d need to be better at it to become successful over time and your daughter may be able to do the same thing as well. She’ll likely never be a “slap you on the back” “hail fellow well met” (I won’t be either) but she may well learn to self-promote and build alliances to get things done.</p>
<p>We know a couple whose son didn’t finish college. He keeps getting these commission only sales jobs and losing them/leaving them BECAUSE HE IS HORRIBLE AT SALES. He’s spent years failing at sales. He finally took the exam to be a pharmacy tech and I think he will do a lot better at that. It would have been great for him if someone had helped him focus on this strengths and weaknesses early on. (He’s in his late 20s, is a husband and father and has been on public assistance.)</p>
<p>missypie, I am trying/will try to help my kids get experience in areas they wouldn’t normally think about that seem to fit their strengths. That way, they can see a bit of a few different worlds. ShawD worked last summer in her uncle’s molecular biology lab. Got a sense of what life in a lab is like and about one area of biology. I will at some point hook my son up in two areas. One is high-level investment management and the other is real estate development.</p>
<p>Excellent idea, Shawbridge. I’ve always tried to talk to my kids about the working hours/conditions of certain occupations. For example, if a good night’s sleep is essential, don’t deliver babies. If you must have holidays off, don’t manage a hotel. Indoor/outdoor. Regular hours vs. not. Salary vs. another method of compensation.</p>
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missypie – how is your S doing? Did his mentor ever start meeting with hiim?
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<p>Thanks for asking. He says everything is fine, which is what he said last semester. He says he doesn’t really have grades yet but that so far he is understanding the class he failed. I told him his HAS to find out his grades.</p>
<p>He meets with his peer mentor once a week. What they talk about is what she talks about with everyone. Week 1: Time Management. Week 2: Study Skills. Etc. Nothing individualized in the least. I’m not pleased, but maybe he’ll still learn a thing or two from her.</p>
<p>I think it is hard to generalize by profession. One doctor doesn’t have the same business model as another just as one lawyer may work differently than another, even within the same office at the same level. Within sales, I have seen a wide variety of personality types who were successful, just matched up with different personalities on the customer side to suit. </p>
<p>Some of the advice I see on cc about resumes and what works in an interview would be a deal killer if the kid were interviewing with me. As the same time, what I value isn’t what necessarily works with a co-worker who may be hiring for an almost identical position but in a different group. Fit comes down to individuals–your boss and immediate peer group–as much as profession, at least in my experience. </p>
<p>However, I will agree that anybody who brings in the business is paid far more than those who do the business in virtually every field I know and obviously some professions pay more than others.</p>
<p>D2 called last night – couldn’t IM – because of major computer virus. I told her to call her sister (computer geek), and they at least got the computer up and running. But it’s not working entirely properly, and she needs to take it to IT. How does the virus get through the required security software?</p>
<p>Zetesis: New virus are made daily - if not hourly. The security software is always just a bit behind. The question is she really good about keeping the virus sw updated? Sometimes I know with my old laptop there are times when for whatever reason it just doesn’t automatically update. She shouldn’t open any email that she doesn’t know/trust the sender, do not download anything that she doesn’t know about prior to the download, and be very careful at social networking sites. That being said I’m not good at any of these - easier said than done and I have had messy viruses. Typically the virus “fix” can usually be found out on the internet if you have another computer to search with :)</p>
<p>I have had a mac for going on five years now and have never had a virus of any kind. </p>
<p>Son says the IT at campus is infamous for breaking computers permanently. But the bookstore is an Apple dealer, so the one time he had some issue he took it there and it was fixed in a day. Not sure what the disconnect there is, but glad it’s on our side, for once.</p>
<p>She is good about things like not opening unknown email, and the like; I think various sites she visits are likely the problem. She also didn’t know whether her virus protection was updated every time she’s connected to the school network. I assumed that was par for the course, but maybe not …</p>
<p>Let’s just say that this is her second serious virus in recent months; and she’s pretty much the only family member who gets them.</p>
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