<p>Happy anniversary DTE. Hope you had a nice celebration!</p>
<p>^^^ What she said!</p>
<p>^^^^ Yes indeed! I second those good wishes.</p>
<p>Happy Anniversary, DTE. Given what you’ve gone through, I wonder if it is easy to feel more grateful than usual for the things and people we have in our lives.</p>
<p>Regarding travel, we have tried to take an exotic family vacation every year. It isn’t happening this year (we had the week in the Yucatan, which was fun except for the macabre incident, but isn’t exotic for us). But, the kids are having a good time: Using FF miles, ShawSon has been in Geneva, Paris and Amsterdam and is rerouting his trip through London because his 2nd friend didn’t show up to travel to Florence. Instead, he’ll get to stay with his cousin in Oxford for 2 or 3 days. Although the cousin is studying for finals, ShawSon will get to see what a Masters in Oxford could be like. ShawD is up at our house in the Laurentians for a week with her friend feeling oh so independent. ShawSon will go up there for a week in August and then the family will join him for the last couple of weeks of the summer. Not exotic – we spend part of the summer there every year – but it is a place where the family (other than me) feels deeply relaxed.</p>
<p>But, I got an invitation to speak in Greece yesterday. The requester wanted to know what time of year I’d like to be in Greece. I asked if June next year was a good time. She said it was a terrific time. If so, I might take ShawWife or the family for a Greek islands trip. I’m sure my host will help arrange. I also got an inquiry about doing something in North Carolina near Research Triangle Park – which seems a lot less exotic than Greece and have calls scheduled tonight with Malaysia and tomorrow AM with Israel. With luck, I can pass many of these trips off to others.</p>
<p>The most exotic trip we’ve got planned this summer is the first leg of the Shawbridge et fille college tour. I had started the trip with four Canadian schools on the last three days of the week before ShawD shows up at the last of the schools for a summer science program. I had put Colorado College in for the Monday of that week (we’d spend the weekend in Colorado for fun) and then we needed a day of travel to get to Halifax from Colorado Springs. But ShawD thought CC was less likely to be a place for her (her college counselor told her that it would be likely if she applied ED so she definitely has a shot at getting in) and she substituted in Queen’s University in Kingston, Ontario and University of Rochester. So, we’re going to get 6 schools in 5 days. We’ll be using FF miles for that trip. And, the reason ShawD is so enthusiastic about Queen’s is that there is an anatomy course freshman can take in which the students get to dissect a cadaver every week (class?). I was going to say a live cadaver, but there may be a better term. Not my cup of tea, but dissecting animals (frog, chicken, and various other things including an animal that had a lot of fat, can’t remember which, and you had to reach in and scoop out the fat) was her favorite academic work.</p>
<p>Sounds like lots of exciting travel for your family, shawbridge! If you have a chance after the college trip, it would be great to hear a report about U of Rochester (and the other colleges) - including ShawD’s impressions of biology/anatomy there.</p>
<p>Shaw, we spent 2+ weeks in Greece recently – go! It was fabulous. It was our first real vacation in years and we all loved it. We were in Athens and the Peloponnese rather than the islands, but there’s plenty to see wherever you go.</p>
<p>all the trips sound fascinating. today was a nice day. My friend’s sister is a professional organizer and she took about 8 bags of garbage, and 8 bags of goodwill. bye bye to the rugrats suitcase. do you think it will be a collectors item?
Shaw does your d want to be a doctor? My d is interested in dissection too. I never liked it. Please share her insights on the schools.
You definately change after things happen to you. I am absolutely a stronger person, and very appreciate of people and things in my life. I just had my house painted and my neighbors like it, but one said it is a gutsy choice. Not to me, after this year painting my house was not that hard at all. I guess it gives you perspective. The only thing I dont seem to have perspective on is my kids, I still stress about them the same. Some things will never change.</p>
<p>dte - happy anniversary!</p>
<p>Eggniece is out of the hospital. She’s been diagnosed with Hep A, but has been cleared to continue the next 8 weeks of her study abroad. Raw seafood is the likely culprit.</p>
<p>Meanwhile the Eggs have already returned from our family vacation: 5 days in West Texas. The best part was a star party at the McDonald Observatory. We also revisited Big Bend and Fort Davis. Nothing glamourous, but very restorative. Aaaahhhh.</p>
<p>DH leaves next week for a canoe trip with a youth group and has a fishing trip lined up with friends in the fall. DS has a trip to DC later in the summer. I will putter around the house as usual. Once DS is back at school, Eggdad and I will act like we are on vacation!</p>
<p>DTE, ShawD is not a big thinker type so long-term career planning is not the kind of thing she’d do well. She knows that she likes biology and the more hands-on the better. She also likes helping people, talking (well, she’s a teenage girl), and kids (and kids absolutely love her). We suggested to her that she might want to be a doctor or a nurse practitioner or some kind of job where she gets to talk to and help people but she was already there: When Gray’s Anatomy started, she loved the show but said they didn’t show enough surgeries and said she wanted to be a cardio-thoracic surgeon. She thinks being a doctor sounds like a good idea, but I want to be careful not to push her into something. But, she is so enthusiastic in discussing the human body and loves the cutting part. I think life as a doc can be tough and have a number of friends who are doctors and mothers and it can be tough. However, there are models that do work – if you are good, you can often work part-time if you wish to (tougher for a lawyer or executive to do that). </p>
<p>bblfraser, thanks. I have wanted to go to Greece but it just hasn’t worked out. I think we were going to go with my wife’s parents who liked to take their kids and grand-kids traveling, but my FIL became ill and then died. I’ve learned from my in-laws and have been taking kids traveling and plan to continue it when they are out of college as well.</p>
<p>Interloper here from the '10 thread (sorry!). I just have to ask eggmom whether her niece had been vaccinated for Hep A. My D is planning study abroad in China and her being sick there is a huge fear. I am so glad your niece is better and out of the hospital.</p>
<p>(I thought about sending eggmom a private message but I suspect there are others who would be interested too.)</p>
<p>Kids have all these things they are doing - camps and travel - while the only week I had to really get away without worrying about someone is now the week my Mother says she is coming to say goodbye to my brother who was just offered a very big position that will have him living in New Delhi for the next two years. They don’t have kids so they just look at it like a huge adventure.</p>
<p>Happy anniversary DTE. I just read an article in our paper how it’s more important to celebrate the anniversary’s. It’s easy to GET married; It’s a lot harder to stay married for decades! So woo hoo to you!</p>
<p>I too can’t wait until we no longer have tuitions to pay, but it’s a long way off for sure. I just keep my inlaws in mind. He just kept payng himself the tuitions he was paying to schools once the kids graduated and then a year after their youngest of four graduated college, he had “banked” enough to pay cash for his place in Colorado. And now that think is worth triple of what he paid for it. THe man has a midas touch when it comes to real estate. He never sold anything for less than double what he paid for it. Ever. He actually quadrupled when they moved from CT! I have no idea where this ramble came from!</p>
<p>Wow, I am so envious of all these glamorous lives and trips. </p>
<p>shawbridge, thinking of your daughter makes me think of an absolutely wonderful cardio-thoracic surgeon who operated on my dad. His speciality was pediatric surgery- and I could see where kids would absolutely love him and trust him during a very difficult time in their lives. Certainly takes a special gift to work with children who are ill. </p>
<p>DTE, had totally forgotten about Rugrats! I think you were wise to send that off- many more years before it would be a collector’s item, I think!</p>
<p>Happy belated anniversay dte! Congratulations! Hope you celebrated in style with your wonderful H! Jealous of your organizing…need to work on that around here!</p>
<p>D1 comes home today and will stay through the weekend as we try to do some wedding planning. Hoping there are no bridezilla moments.</p>
<p>Shawbridge, interesting thoughts on medicine as a career for women. Based on my family’s experience, I’d agree that medicine may be a better path than law or business executive for a young woman who also wants to have a family. There do seem to be rewarding part-time options for nurse practitioners and MDs. Or there’s my sister’s career path: MD (full-time, though with manageable hours) married to a guy who’s handy around the house and great with their kids (read: house-husband). And yes a job where you can talk and help people (and do dissections?) sounds potentially very fulfilling. </p>
<p>[Sometimes I worry about sharing too much personal info on this forum, but the discussions can be so interesting]</p>
<p>The thing about medicine and having a family is that so many medical specialties take such a long time. My law partner’s daughter wants to go into pediatric psychiatry and she’ll be done with all residencies when she’s 31-32. If you delay starting a family until you’ve been practicing a few years, that puts you in the 35 year old range …which works fine as long as you can get pregnant on cue. With law, you’re out at 25 (if you go straight through), prove yourself for a couple of years, and you’re still well under 30.</p>
<p>missypie, good point. A couple of female physicians that I spoke with made the same point – one has four kids and switched to epidemiology. The wife of one of my college roommates went to Yale and some very good med school and became a pediatrician. She had kids, probably in her early 30’s, and quit medicine after a while – she was the first woman in the practice and the older docs were not too flexible. While they would let her work part-time, her responsibilities for being on call didn’t become part-time and she ultimate quit medicine. Now, with both kids through college, she’s figuring out what next. She says that she doesn’t need the money so she just wants to figure out how best to make a difference.</p>
<p>I doubt ShawD would enjoy being a lawyer and law would not play to her strengths. One of our close friends quit legal practice when she had her second kid, but she was at one of the largest, most demanding firms.</p>
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<p>There are lots of firms out there (lots!) where one can have fairly regular, reasonable hours. But folks who have been at the largest, most prestigious firms in the country would have to take a couple of steps down in the level of sophistication of the work (perhaps deals that make the front page of the *Dallas Morning News *but not the Wall Street Journal) and more steps down in compensation.</p>
<p>Starting off at one of the largest, most demanding firms can provide great experience for a new lawyer, though the lifestyle compromises can be huge (working 30 days some months, missing friends’ weddings because of work, etc.). For many young lawyers, a few years of this could be very worthwhile. Some will stay with it, and others will search for a job offering a better balance between work and everything else in life. The latter was the path I followed. Now I’m in a more hands on phase of my life (in terms of physically caring for people) and think medicine might have been a better life-time career path - one where the training and skills would provide lifelong benefits and gratification.</p>
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<p>I agree. Some of those young lawyers work so hard that they get about four years of experience in two years. But I always tell the young lawyers who take those opportunites: “Don’t buy your house based on that level of income.” (Especially if both husband and wife are working those kinds of hours.) It breaks my heart to hear young mothers say “I wish we hadn’t bought such an expensive house; I can’t scale back at work at all.”</p>