<p>We go back for orientation tomorrow, after dropping off D1 yesterday for fh preseason. She has been texting me all day with “additional items to bring.” On the list-1) second fan, since her bed is lofted, she wants one for the desk and one for the bed, 2) a second power strip. surge protector- 2 fans, a laptop, printer, and chargers take up plug space quickly, 3) more command strips for jackets and purses, 4) more BBB thin hangars. 5) A clip on light for her bed.</p>
<p>I told that after tomorrow, she has to figure out how to take the bus to Target. :)</p>
<p>I have been trying not to neglet D2, but it has been hard this past week. I took her school shopping last weekend to get supplies and clothes. She will be a freshman in HS, and she starts school on 8/30.</p>
<p>momofzach-My girls know that I take photos of them all the time, since I am an avid scrapbooker. Over the years, they ahve learned to humor me instead of fighting me when I take photos. D1 even let me take a photo of her standing in front of the mascot “Gompeii the Goat”.</p>
<p>Wow, launches left and right – and pretty much smooth sailing (flying?). Hope there are no storms in Louisiana!</p>
<p>So the low phone call Friday was D saying that after going to the welcome events (convocation and other stuff), she felt sure she’d made the wrong choice and she’d rather have debt and be eating ramen noodles for ten years and be at Hampshire (or Sarah Lawrence – yo, Samuck!) Felt trapped and miserable and like she didn’t belong. She didn’t talk long, which was worse for me – not knowing exactly what was wrong.</p>
<p>It was kind of like this at orientation. I think part of the problem is they have stuff aimed at the majority of students who are into football and fraternities and other “normal” college stuff. She was peeved back then that they talked constantly about football and other sporting events and said not a word about music/theater/dance/cultural events of the kind she’s interested in. (But they do have those things!)</p>
<p>I know she’s also brought up being worried about going to a “regular” school. Her high school was very “alternative.” No textbooks or tests. Everything based on participation, discussion, papers, presentations, etc. I think it’s really sinking in that she’s going mainstream, which she hasn’t done since elementary school (and she hated her elem. school). She knows she can thrive in the atmosphere of a more alternative LAC, but this state U stuff is an unknown universe.</p>
<p>Talked to her very briefly today and she said she was feeling mostly better. She said she talked to her best friend, who has been so supportive of her. (cooker – he’ll be in the great con program at St. Olaf and living in a great con dorm I think – maybe he and your D will meet!) Aww, she doesn’t need to talk to mom anymore? Sigh.</p>
<p>Okay, going to the financial safety does have its perks – she’s coming home to do laundry tomorrow! Hopefully we’ll find out everything’s okay. Or at least not terrible.</p>
<p>More of an irritation, like an itchy rash that won’t quite go away. ;)</p>
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<p>Exactly. And when they have “done wrong” by your kid, seeing a weekly newsletter proclaiming that they are the future of education just doesn’t “set well” either. </p>
<p>Hurray for all of the new launch stories. D and I did the “final” shopping but she forgot to bring the list with her. Oh well. I told her that anything she can’t get at the local grocery store or drugstore she will have to figure out a substitute. She will, and it will be fine I am sure. Her biggest expenditures today were for some silk flowers and a lighter frame so she can hang a water color done by her aunt on the wall of her room. Her priorities are certainly not the norm… But we had a lovely day together so I am happy.</p>
<p>Aww snoozn- I am so sorry. You know, when we went to orientation at Hampshire we ran into a LOT of transfer students. If the State U really isn’t a fit after a month or two- your D at least gave it a chance and can look elsewhere with a clear conscience.</p>
<p>That’s what I thought – I was glad she had to be there early for her sport, but she just called, sounding down, because everyone else’s parents are here moving them in and they’re going to Target to get stuff for their room! So I could have had her fly down on her own, then come for move-in, or come twice (like highhead). There’s no right answer here – the two-step move-in just prolongs the inevitable goodbye.</p>
<p>I forgot about all those neat tricks I read here on cc! I believe ds wouldn’t have noticed me slipping money between the sheets - he was all focused on electronics set up and getting the ethernet set. Apparently ds forgot to pack the cell phone charger for band camp because we havent heard from him since yesterday noon. Poor dd3 was hoping ds would call on her birthday but I am not making that call. I’m sure he is having a great time, he loves band camp.</p>
<p>This is the post that brought tears to my eyes. I feel the same way. We even “read” half of Ginger Pye years ago as an audiotape on a long road trip. So many things I wish I could have done better, and no chance to try.</p>
<p>ShawD was sad a couple of days ago in part because her mother hadn’t let her buy a dress $70 reduced from $200+ at TJ Maxx that is a very adult (though not ridiculously revealing dress). Today they stopped by the store again and it had been sold and she felt sad again. I sense that something about the dress is somehow symbolic of her transition. What she doesn’t know is that ShawWife went back after the first day and bought it and has it hanging in my closet to give to ShawD over the next week.</p>
<p>We saw The Help tonight. A lovely movie, albeit one with a tad happier ending than the book.</p>
<p>It is 1:48 am and I am wondering what I was thinking to allow my daughter to go to a school with an urban campus in a city with a high crime rate.</p>
<p>Sunnydayson, I am doing the same thing. My DS’s university allows you to track his dining transactions. It is amazing and so simple. Every few hours I find myself going to the link to see what he has done. I think I will look at it frequently over the next week just to make sure he has the right meal plan. This past week, he didn’t use all of the plan because there was so much food given out at various events during welcome week.</p>
<p>Missypie, your DD will be fine. Does the school have an alert system you can join so that you get an email of any crime near campus? My son’s school does and it is interesting to see the crime descriptions. During orientation, the police was very candid and said the major issue is robbery and from what I have read he was not exaggerating. Since he also said that computers are the number one item sold, I am glad I did that CSI policy before he left. Hopefully he will not have to use the policy, but at least I have piece of mind.</p>
<p>I just got all goose bumps reading your post-my son leaves Tuesday-just rem-they are going to college you did a good job obviously-and still can continue-they will never be gone-(I guess I can say that mine is sacked out upstairs-we’ll see how I feel Tues)
One more to add to the list RPI-Tues 23rd</p>
<p>Yikes, I hope not! I’d never sleep if I received alerts of all the crime in her area of Chicago!</p>
<p>Of course, with some of the '13s going into the military, I know I’m being a wimp.</p>
<p>I think part of my unease with the move is her not having a car. Our area is so car-dependent. It is good that D will have a week of “immersion” in the city before classes start - they work with them to feel comfortable with public transportation. It’s just so different.</p>
<p>Just checking in. I have caught up to everyone’s news. I am happy to hear about the successful moves, sad to hear if there are any issues, and identifying with so many feelings about this time in all our lives.</p>
<p>We move him in on Sunday. So far a bed set, an extra set of sheets, and a laptop. We moved my parents into the new facility Friday-it was hard but we got it done. I can now focus on him this week-I told him to make a list for each category-electronics, room items, bathroom items, supplies, etc. My daughter has two a days starting tomorrow for the HS-she is also starting HS next Tuesday. I have a job interview this Tuesday.</p>
<p>It’s going to be a bumpy ride around here I fear. :(</p>
<p>**The next new student move-ins are Case Western Reserve University and MIT (pre-orientation) move-ins on August 21st- today!
Move-in day is TODAY! Where did the summer go? :eek:
[ul][<em>]Wellesley College move-in on August 22nd is just 1 day to go.
[</em>]Pitt, Midwestern State, Duke and RPI move-ins on August 23rd are just 2 days to go.
[<em>]Marquette University and Bryn Mawr move-ins on August 24th are just 3 days to go.
[</em>]Willamette move-in on August 25th is just 4 days to go.
[<em>]Georgetown University, Champlain College, Elon University, and SUNY Potsdam move-ins on August 26th are just 5 days to go.
[</em>]Franklin W. Olin College of Engineering, California Lutheran University, Sarah Lawrence College, Tulane University, Lebanon Valley College, and Loyola University of Maryland move-ins on August 27th are just 6 days to go.
[li]University of Pennsylvania (Wharton - Penn Quest), NYU - Stern BEP, Adelphi University, RIT Honors, Northeastern University move-ins on August 28th are just 1 week to go. [/ul][/li]The last new student move-ins are the University of Oregon and the University of Southern Oregon on September 22nd<br>
Move-in day in 32 days. Just over a month to go for the final move-in.</p>
<p>Sorry snoozen to hear your daughter has some buyer’s remorse; I fear that for my D who is not going to one of her original favorites; I hope she feels better soon.</p>
<p>Missypie - I can relate; D will be in a similar environment.</p>
<p>Pepper - I think you have a lot on your plate! I hope your parents are settling in well and that both your transitioning kids are happy. Good luck on the interview. </p>
<p>Shaw - great story about the dress. Clever wife you have! I tend not to see movies when I have enjoyed the book. I might make an exception to this policy for “The Help.”</p>
<p>We have the two step move in here as well. Sent D alone for Pre-O and will be there for move in. We could not manage accompanying her for both. It was hard to send her alone! I cannot wait to see her in 3 days. Here’s hoping for unseasonably cool and unhumid weather in MD on Wednesday!</p>
<p>Thanks for updating us on all the ups and downs. I’m happy to hear about the successful launches and sorry to hear about the bumpy ones. As my mother says “Nobody said that parenting is easy.”</p>
<p>Holliesue: Congrats on the successful move-in. Glad to hear that your D is happy and you’re feeling so upbeat.</p>
<p>Sunnyday: I’m glad that your launch went well, but sorry to hear about how say you’re feeling. It will get easier.</p>
<p>Snoozn: I’m sorry to hear about your daughter’s doubts about fit. I’ve known kids like her who “settled” for the state flagship, and they usually do find their niche. I hope that she can get involved in some dance groups and find some kindred spirits.</p>
<p>Classof2015: It can really hurt to hear your kid feeling sad about seeing the other parents. I’m sure that she’ll feel better once the other parents leave.</p>
<p>Missypie: This fall I’ll have 2 daughters at city schools, so I know how you feel. My D1’s school has outstanding security. At night, there is a campus police officer on every block, even off-campus. As long as your daughter uses good sense and doesn’t walk alone late at night, she should be fine.</p>
<p>Pepper: You have a lot to deal with right now. I’m glad that you got your parents moved and can now focus on getting your kids ready. It’s tough to have 2 kids in transition at the same time. Hugs.</p>
<p>Mnmom: I hope that you get good weather for move-in. It’s been pretty hot and humid here, but occasionally we get a break and get some beautiful days. I still remember my JHU move-in. My dorm-mate kept asking “Is it always this HOT in Baltimore?”</p>
<p>We had a 2 part move-in with D1 and will have it again with D2. It was nice with D1. We went back up after her pre-orientation program, and it was nice to see that she had already made friends and felt at home on campus. It does kind of drag things out, however.</p>
<p>Adding a move-in date (thanks, AvonHSDad!): Reed, 8/24. We leave tomorrow morning (cross-country plane for us) to get a bit settled and do all the BBB, Target, new bank stuff before check in early Weds. Boxes are there waiting. DS is getting anxious/pretending nothing’s happening/not talking…we need to go!</p>
<p>momjr – thanks for the support. You are like a mom to us all!</p>
<p>snoozn – got some of the same comments – “why did I choose this school? I should have gone to (fill in the blank). All my friends are going to (blank).” Based on what i’ve read, that’s not what they really mean – it’s just natural to have regrets.</p>
<p>I’d be interested in hearing what other parents say when your child calls, and they’re down. I tried to slip in “I love you” but it was such a brief call, and mostly about “can you send me my ihome?” then she had to go. I want to be prepared for the next one. I feel like calling her back and reassuring her and saying all the things I wanted to say, but she may have moved on, emotionally. I think I’ll just be there when she calls and try to say the right thing. I think they just want to hear our voice and vent and be reassured that their feelings are normal. I offered again to come down for Parents weekend, so at least she if she refuses, she can’t really blame me if she’s the only one without a parent there.</p>
<p>Aaaargh!!! Parenting – the toughest job you’ll ever love.</p>
<p>Tough question about what to say when they call upset. I think my approach would be to just reassure them that it’s normal to feel that way, perhaps relate a related anecdote from your own college days, and if relevant, suggest some action that they might take to improve their situation.</p>