<p>That’s what I keep telling my S, I’m scared the RM will wreck his stuff, but S says before he left Friday night he took pictures of all his stuff (in front of the RA and RM) and he thinks the RM realizes if he destroys his property that would be grounds to kick him out of the school.
I also don’t know, short of having security involved, how the school thinks they will get the RM to agree to move if they find in my S’s favor.
My S is a pretty social kid and really doesn’t want a single but anything is acceptable over his current situation. My H and I have decided if we end up having to pay the extra for the single we’ll do it as long as it resolves this situation quickly.<br>
My S is doing great with classes (all A’s so far on all graded papers and tests) he also loves all the organizations he’s joined, it’s killing me that this had to happen to ruin what otherwise has been a great beginning to his college career.</p>
<p>Flipping things around a little bit on elka’s S’s situation. Obviously the RM is the bad person here and there have already been threats. I would actually want my S to move somewhere else. If he stays there then the RM knows right where to find him and can still create havoc in his life. If elka’s S moves to another room maybe the chance of RM coming back to cause problems would be decreased.</p>
<p>Plus elka’s S can start fresh with or without a new RM but somewhere else. Even though he isn’t in the wrong, I just have a feeling it would be safer for him.*</p>
<p>*Have you figured out why my name is nervousnellie?? :-)</p>
<p>Best wishes to him though-no one should have to deal with this kind of situation.</p>
<p>lilypod-I would definitely make a call to someone. Anyone since you don’t have parents contact information. The RA’s or dorm higher up people should be contacting them. I really hope everything turns out ok. I really hate it when young people have situations that are so hard to handle wether they are the one with the problem or the ones seeing it.</p>
<p>lilypod, no extra advice, but I am thinking of you.</p>
<p>My daughter has been gone a month and the two month water bill is $10 cheaper than it used to be. That’s a bonus. 6000 more months and college will have paid for itself for freshman year… lol.</p>
<p>Mom2jl- my daughter uses the 25 minutes focused study time, and 5 minute break then after a couple of hours gives herself a reward like a short visit with friends a few minutes of TV time, coffee break… </p>
<p>Lillypad- Will be thinking of your son and his roommate especially… How scary</p>
<p>Elka- I truly hope everything works out for your son… how frustrating and frightening. </p>
<p>Jaylnn- thanks for all the flu shot info…</p>
<p>mimk6 - I’m jumping in before I finish reading the whole thread (page 153) because my daughter ran into the same problem a few years ago and it was very frustrating. When she first got the sinus infection it showed in her teeth so when the Health Center asked if it hurt in certain areas she said no. I knew right away it was a sinus infection so I called the Health Center and asked for an ENT recommendation and bypassed the whole Health Center thing. She used our health insurance and got her meds right away. This ENT is now her specialist and she has needed to go back about 3 times to finally get rid of the sinus infection. It’s been two years and she’s not had one, knock wood.</p>
<p>Skip the Health Center and go directly to an ENT, you’ll be much happier. JMHO</p>
<p>So sorry for you guys Elka but at least it’s moving ahead somewhat. I vote for the roommate to have to move into the single, why would the school subject anyone else to this guy? Good luck and keep us informed.</p>
<p>Elka - this is what I would do. I would call the school, be really upset about what your son has been subjected to since he has been to school. You then ask the school to give your son the single for no extra charge. The single is empty right now. It is not likely that someone will move in at this point. For mental anguish they should give that room to your son. Why should you pay extra for it? You didn’t admit the RM - a druggie no less. They created an environment which is not conducive for your son to have a peaceful enjoyment of his room and is having an effect on his learning, which you are paying very good money for. If this doesn’t get resolved soon, your son may need to withdraw.</p>
<p>Let me know if you want me to call. :)</p>
<p>Oldfort - if this isn’t resolved one way or another by tomorrow that is exactly the phone call (or something like it) I will be making whether the kiddo likes it or not.</p>
<p>I would let oldfort call. She is quite effective.</p>
<p>I am considering it</p>
<p>I’d be more than a little angry that my son wasn’t allowed to stay in his own room because of his roommate’s behavior.</p>
<p>I second the oldfort call! I’ll bet if you DS had to sleep in the RA’s room there might be a faster solution.</p>
<p>Elka,
Would your son prefer the single, or would he prefer to stay on the floor?</p>
<p>Mom2jl: Have kiddo read the book “How to be a straight A student” by Cal Newport. It talks about how to study efficiently and how to prioritize and schedule one’s work.</p>
<p>Boysx3- he really wants to stay in his room, but it’s really out of his hands now. I just want him to have a room</p>
<p>D loves NYC, and cold has gotten better. She thought she ought to tell us about the girl that committed suicide at Columbia during orientation week. Somehow hadn’t registered when we told her back when it happened. Also had a story about a supposed crazy impostor that was going through Columbia orientation while sleeping on campus in bushes until found out.</p>
<p>When I was on chemo it was advised that I not be around people who had flumist
Elka hope this resolves and Oldfort has it right</p>
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<p>Yes, yes, yes!!! Like you, I was very close with DS in high school and we had long car drives, one-on-one talks, etc. Now suddenly, I find myself sharing the few precious phone calls. A couple of weeks ago I talked to him for an hour alone and it was wonderful, but I also felt guilty that I was getting that time and DH wasn’t. When he calls and others are around, we put him on speaker phone. It’s nice, but I also crave some one-on-one conversation. But, I’m conflicted – talking to him alone feels like a guilty pleasure.</p>
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<p>It’s not clear the exact nature of the medical crisis, but if it is psychiatric, which it seems that it might be, I would be proactive. I would call a dean or a person in authority and calmly express my concerns. Then I would follow up in writing and let them know you are documenting that this kid was hospitalized, released and had another episode and you are concerned for his safety. While we often talk here on CC about boundaries, helicoptering, etc., safety trumps absolutely everything. And if you put it in writing so that there is evidence that you brought it to the school’s attention, there is a higher likelihood that he’ll get help. If I’m wrong about the nature of the situation, then ignore my advice – although it might apply to other medical situations.</p>