@beech653 I’ve done the same…flew from the east coast to the west coast to meet online friends several years ago. For a second, I thought maybe you were part of the same group, but we met in LA. I consider many of the people I met “real” friends now, though it took a while to connect and know them by their real names instead of their screen names.
@morningside95 , that is a cool story! Props to that boy for taking a chance like that and glad it worked out.
I’ve met up with people from my Sept 97 Moms group several times over the years. We had several big get togethers when the kids were little, one that I coordinated in my area, and many smaller meet ups. My husband doesn’t think twice when I tell him that we are getting together with such and such friends from my forum when we travel to a different city. I’ve also met people from my Catholic forum and my pregnancy loss support group list serv. From 1991 to 99, we moved around quite a bit, so my forum friends are actually some of my longer-term friends in life.
Welcome @beech653.
Thinking about breaking ED. In case of Cornell, last year 31 students broke the ED agreements out of 1196 admissions. I think it is a small number and I guess the most of them have financial issues. It is small number to track down each high school by Cornell, but I doubt they will do, unless they think breaking ED increases significantly.
http://admissions.cornell.edu/sites/admissions.cornell.edu/files/Class%20Profile%202019%20.pdf
My initial reaction was not nearly as thoughtful and eloquent as @fretfulmother @ChicagoSportsFn & @morningside95 because it was, “Throttle that GC for not giving you a heads-up!” So please follow the much less violent advice before me and welcome. This thread is an oasis of support and understanding, and we are glad you are joining us.
@ChicagoSportsFn @palm715 thank you! 
I hope it all works out for @beech653 !!
Unless the school has a policy of rejecting most ED kids that didn’t get admitted, there is absolutely no reason for a school to reject a kid and not defer unless they are planning to reject everyone from the school, ED or RD because the high school is now blacklisted.
If a kid is transferring, they should aim for many and not just one school that sent a letter. It is way too much effort to put in for a transfer. Essentially, the freshman year is going to be spent working their tails off, getting into lots of ECs and trying to be friends with professors who can give recs. Lot of pressure in the first semester.
Hi, can I join this thread? My D16 is waiting to hear from a bunch of colleges, mostly in CA (we live in NorCal and I am from SoCal) but a couple in NY. She’s been accepted to Cal Poly SLO, San Diego State Honors, and St. John’s (NY) Honors w/ a merit scholarship. It’s been a stressful process (I know you all can relate!)
Welcome @LionsMum and Good Luck to your D on the rest of her applications and congratulations on her current acceptances.
Welcome @LionsMum
@beech653 – Your equanimity is impressive. I’m totally w @palm715 on this. I felt my heart rate rising as I read your note. I think it’s totally negligent on the GC’s part to not inform you of the prior year’s event. I would’ve ripped him/her the proverbial new lower GI tract orifice.
Moving forward, I’m in the camp of those who think there’s little downside to writing to some specific person in the admission’s office (local adcomm rep, head of admissions), perhaps wording the note in a way that almost compels them to let you know whether or not last year’s debacle was a factor in your son’s rejection. If they re-think it and accept him, once he’s in elsewhere he can call them back and tell them, “Sorry. I’m going to MIT.”
Also, I think it borders on insulting to reject (and not defer) a kid, and to then follow up w a note “Keep us in mind so we can dash your hopes and dreams again when you apply as a transfer.”
The rejection is their loss. And if you, as an alumnus, contribute to the school you might consider donating to a more worthwhile cause as soon as the school is no longer a consideration for any of your younger children.
And of course, welcome. You’re now obligated to give us follow up, especially when you know where your son will end up. We’ll revel in his success.
Welcome @lionsmum!
I know we all have enough anxiety, but guess what? I am on the parent newsletter email list for Mizzou (I hope it is ok that I am naming names at this point) because I think S will probably end up there. Found out that family weekend is in Sept and they noted that rooms in the area fill up early. So, I figured I’d book through one of our two preferred chains (H travels a ton, we usually have points) and everything is booked. Literally everything. I found a rental through VRBO and booked that. You can cancel and get a full refund 60 days out, so I figured it was a no brainer as there’s a high chance he’s going there and a low chance that there would be a room if I waited until official decision time. Is this beyond the pale? Perhaps I have officially gone over the edge.
Thanks all for the warm welcome and the support!
This whole ordeal has probably been more difficult for me than for my son, as it is my beloved alma mater that either just didn’t want S16 (bad enough), or is being petty, rejecting him for the sins of another. I can’t decide which is worse. I had gotten past the disappointment of December’s rejection within a few days, but this new information brought it up all over again, and I think the implications are harder to take. I’m sure I’ll get over it in time, and love them once again, just perhaps not quite as much. They’ve been a big part of my life these past several decades, as I’ve held board positions in my local clubs and done alumni interviews as well, so I’ll have to adjust to the “new normal.” I guess that’s the chance we parents take when our kids apply as legacies. I hope S16’s further past all of this than I am! lol He’s not saying much, but that’s not atypical…
@fretfulmother, I will neither publicly confirm nor deny the identity of Ivy X. I do wish the guidance counselor had said or done something last fall. I didn’t say anything to her this week because I think I was just too stunned by what she was telling me. She sure gave me the impression that she thinks the ordeal had an impact on my son’s application. Otherwise, why even mention it?
@DAPIStained, I don’t know for sure who the involved family is, but I doubt their reason for breaking the ED commitment is financial. If it were a financial reason behind their actions, I don’t think our guidance office would have been in such turmoil, as it was described to me this week. It would have been a non-issue as this is the one stated reason for breaking the commitment.
@texaspg, I’ve often wondered why schools reject rather than defer kids who applied in ED. Even if there’s absolutely no chance they’d get in during RD, why not just defer them? I don’t see the harm in doing so.
I’m going to talk to my son, we’ll think about it over the weekend, and decide if there is any kind of call we can make to admissions at this late stage. Part of me hopes he still wants to transfer in the future, and the other part wants him to be as deliriously happy with his final choice as I was with mine all those years ago.
Welcome to the other newbie, @LionsMum!
Edited to add a note to @AsleepAtTheWheel. I feel I should hate my alma mater at this point, but as I said above, it’s just so hard. I don’t, but I do! How’s that for making sense? I’ve already decided I’m no longer interviewing (how could I? It wouldn’t be fair to the kids in any event) and they’re not getting anymore of my meager donations!
@CAMidwestMom you are totally normal. I have currently done the same thing for Princeton’s parent weekend. Actually, both potential dates for that weekend because it hasn’t been announced yet LOL
Also…am I normal? I’m at the doctor taking DS for his physical and was about to cry because of remembering all of his well baby visits. We had a terrific pediatrician in Pasadena when he was a baby who would take out her RX pad at each visit and write things like, “wonderful baby! Keep it up!”
@CAMidwestMom --I think you’re really sharp booking your stay this far in advance. If he doesn’t go to Mizzou you can always sublet out your VRBO rental at twice the price.
S16’s move-in to Emory was easy because my older sister lives in Atlanta. But we’re already nervous about getting a place to sleep when S16 starts. Amherst, MA isn’t Atlanta.
And welcome @LionsMum!! We’re in northern CA also.
I just wanted to welcome our new posters. This is a fast-moving board, isn’t it? Congrats to all with new acceptances, honors, etc. And how fun that some of you CA people will get to meet up! I am good friends IRL with someone I met through a “mom’s board” when D was a toddler.
@CAMidwestMom you can cancel VRBO 60 days out? How about AirBnB? I think you are SO on it. Maybe more prepared than “normal”, but I am thinking the same thing. My DD has an academic likely letter at one school and was athletically recruited at another; so two of her top choices are (or look) likely. I am thinking you are onto something! I should book the ground portion that can be cancelled and leave the flights until April. At least move-in day; and maybe family weekend.
I thought about this, but since I am not much of a hotel/motel person, thought is was untenable.
Thanks for the suggestions!
Recently, I had a friend on FB (who has elementary school aged kids) lamenting about various things … fussing in the grocery store, struggles to get them out of the house on time, early wake-ups on the weekends, etc. While I didn’t comment, I wanted to say “enjoy every single minute of it because it goes by too quickly.” I know it seems to go on forever when you are the tired parent living that moment, but now with the wisdom of having been there, done that, I’d gladly turn back the clock to really enjoy my children’s deliciousness at that age. Sigh. :(( our babies …