Parents of the HS Class of 2016 (Part 1)

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
18981

@labegg I’ve been doing a similar review of D18’s schedule, GPA and projected test scores. Overall, her GPA, course rigor, ECs and projected scores are slightly better/better than S16. Unlike S16 though, she does not know what she might want as a major.

She’s only taking one AP now (AP Stats). Her junior year schedule includes 3 - AP Calc AB, AP USH and AP Bio plus Spanish III Honors, English III and one elective. She may take AP Physics her senior year because she is not interested in taking AP Chem. She is taking Chemistry Honors right now. She doesn’t like it even though she is doing well.

S16 was able to avoid taking AP Physics and AP Calc since his intended major did not require these classes. Since D18 doesn’t know what she wants to major in, she is taking them so she won’t be restricted. She definitely has the ability to enter a STEM field, but she doesn’t feel strongly about any specific field. She once wanted PT, but changed her mind. Some days she thinks business or marketing.

If your D18 is pretty sure that she’s not interested in STEM, I’d say AP Physics is not necessary. I’m not sure if Calc is needed for a marketing major. If not, then I’d take AP Stats instead.

Despite all our college tours with S16, D18 has no idea what kind of campus, location, size, etc. she prefers. And every time I mention the name of a school she has never heard of, she assumes it’s not a good school. I think she will be a greater challenge than S16.

18982

@texaspg is dead-on accurate about AP Physics, and what’s needed. S is in an AP Physics class this year where Physics would be helpful, most students have it down well - and the teacher doesn’t. In a school that has been fabulous otherwise, this has been an utter trainwreck. I’d thought it was just the teacher, but after talking to other parents at other schools, it sounds like College Board needs to figure out their AP Physics curriculum and plans better as well.

18983

That’s interesting that so many people have complaints about AP Physics. I’m just in normal physics but I have lots of friends who took it, loved it and did quite well on the AP exam. Then again the physics teachers are some of the schools’ best teachers. @labegg if D18 doesn’t really want to take AP, I wouldn’t force her. Regular physics can be challenging enough especially with her otherwise rigorous course load.

18984

AP Physics 1, which is the normal class taught for juniors, is algebra-based physics. So, it is more accessible than the old AP Physics C (which still exists); the C means calculus.

It really depends on how the class is taught and how hands-on it is.

By the way, I second the UIL team. Depending on how it’s structured at your school of course. Ours you can pick and choose the practice meets you go to and there is always room for kids who do the performance events – poetry and prose interpretation. Math side is more competitive. My son has his last regional meet in a couple of weeks; he has loved hanging out with his friends between his events. I think one of his supplemental essays was about arriving to UIL at 7:45, just in time for NumberSense which is always at 8am.

18985

HELP!

So for everyone who has escaped the SS Indecision (or at least know how they plan to escape it), how did you/your student structure the decision making process?

How did you prioritize class rigor/research opportunities/social environment/college location etc?

Do you think of all the accepted schools in one big pool, or start by boiling it down to some semifinalists, or…?

Did you turn down any colleges without going to their accepted student day(s) because some reaches came through? (Does that make you or your student a bad person?).

How much do you talk to other people about the choices? Do you think conventional wisdom has a place?

How do you support your student through the process of deciding - probably what would be one of their biggest decisions up to that point in their life?

At the end of the day, is it just going to be an emotional decision, or does logic have a place?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts in these turbulent times (seas). :wink:

18986

My son is very mature and tends to look at things logically @inn0v8r . He made several visits to the school he selected ( it is instate 3 1/2 hrs away) He compared what each program had to offer in terms of curriculum for his major, FA, ECs, community resources etc. He didn’t really speak to many people regarding his choices, because in our state there is a clear bias towards one of the schools on his list ,and he didn’t want that to play into his personal decision . He ultimately chose the school that he has felt connected to emotionally and logically since his Junior year even though many of his peers think he’s crazy for giving up a coveted spot at Clemson or Furman.

18987

@inn0v8r D only had 4 applications and 2 acceptances, but even then we didn’t go to the accepted student day at all for one of her acceptances. She just decided that she did NOT want to live in the state where the school was located. The school on paper is a better school than the one she decided on, but she didn’t feel it was as good of a fit.

I would see if your son does have a few that he’s willing to rule out just based on a factor or two, then maybe do something more logical with the remaining ones.

18988

Thank you all for your tremendous advice and input! I knew I could count on ya’ll for sound advice!

I think I like the idea of holding off on the AP Physics until Senior year. Will have to present that to D18 (and Dad…). The AP Physics concurrent with Pre-Calc is pretty standard for the school district.

AP Stats and Honors Pre-Calc seems like a lot of math to me? (but I HATE math so maybe on the best judge)

@RyanG1207 - maybe we have the same daughter, lol?

18989

@inn0v8r - D16 narrowed it down to 3 semi-finalists. Turned down all but 2 without doing an admitted student preview day. D16’s choice was definitely more logic based than emotional. I tried to not talk about it unless she brought it up and gave her room. It was definitely a rough couple of weeks and now a few weeks since we have gotten of the SS Indecision cruise things have been rocky, not about the school decision just the reality of heading off to college.

18990

@labegg Ha! Maybe! If that’s the case, can you handle her? I just don’t have the energy.

D18 is taking AP Stats and Honors Pre-Calc now. S16 took both last year as a junior. It seems that a lot of kids do that here. Both have said that they didn’t really consider stats a math. S16 originally dreaded the idea of taking 2 math classes, but he ended up really liking stats. I think he felt that it was much more tangible and practical than any other math class he’s taken.

18991

Hope everyone’s weekend travels went well and were helpful in this process. I’m in the middle of writing a speech for NHS which is more challenging than I thought.

18992

@inn0v8r We pushed her to accept the best financial offer. Some schools were taken off the table due to being completely unaffordable. Re: the remaining schools, requiring “smaller” loans by student and parents, we couldn’t justify them being $X dollars “better” than the opportunities UK was offering.

18993

@readingclaygirl - good luck with the speechwriting!

18994

Thanks @labegg

18995

S narrowed down options himself quite a bit before even applying - 6 applications, 5 acceptances. He took two acceptances off right away - one was a safety where a class he saw was less rigorous than most of what he’s had in HS, and the other gave next to no merit aid, and seems to be shifting its focus more towards STEM/tech at the expense of the Humanities, and he values both. (We also know a lot of people there, and have some insight into the inside scoop.)

That left three - and we’re still sort of there. The one with the most aid (full tuition) is farthest away. He really loves the Honors College there, but wouldn’t know about an invitation in time, so it’s likely to fall off by default. That leaves one in the Midwest, one in SoCal. We visited the one in the Midwest and he did an overnight. As much as he loved the classes & faculty presentation, he wasn’t too keen on some of what he observed in the dorm visit. It’s not off the table, but it’s gone from “tied for first” to “likely second choice.” We go to SoCal later this week. Of these two, Midwest is offering him $18K/year - still leaving >40 to cover. SoCal school gives no merit aid, and although they don’t technically look at noncustodial parent stuff in our case, I look at it, and the noncustodial parent is absolutely contributing, so we’re full pay.

The decision will be his, although I reserve the right to point out pros and cons from my perspective, and we’ve had some good discussions.

I really had planned for S to apply for a bunch of scholarships, but mono took most everything but the basics off the table. I’ve told him that next year we’re expecting him to at least apply for a few.

18996

@inn0v8r I too am fascinated with different decision making processes. There are as many ways to do it as there are high school seniors I think. As we’ve established before, the pi(e) lady gets a little stressed out by too many factors in a spreadsheet. Pie kid, although a logical mathematician to his core, is going with the gut approach, after having eliminated all but three. And realistically, two, as his preference is to see another part of the US.

Pie dad, an analyst and an engineer, shudders. But then he realizes that all choices are good. He has since put away his pros-and-cons list that he was waving about for a while there.

What we as parents are aligned on is that money being equal enough (which it is since we’re basically full pay so costs are close enough for all but the relative bargain state flagship), it is up to the kid. It is his future to chart and even if the decision is not the one we would make, we’ll support him.

18997

@inn0v8r
So for everyone who has escaped the SS Indecision (or at least know how they plan to escape it), how did you/your student structure the decision making process?
We did a spreadsheet, focused in great part on how much each school was going to cost, but also things like how difficult it would be to get to (airport access from school, how long a flight/drive from home, etc), the surrounding area, school culture, M/F ratio, etc.

How did you prioritize class rigor/research opportunities/social environment/college location etc?
Social environment ended up being a bigger deal than we anticipated. Finding his people took precedence over location, and class rigor became as much “I don’t want to be in over my head” as “I don’t want it to be a cakewalk”.

Do you think of all the accepted schools in one big pool, or start by boiling it down to some semifinalists, or…?
We had quarter- and semi-finals, simply by virtue of a) who accepted him and b) who was affordable. Ultimately it came down to three, then one (from 10).

Did you turn down any colleges without going to their accepted student day(s) because some reaches came through? (Does that make you or your student a bad person?).
We didn’t go to most of his Accepted Days, because of logistics and finances. If that makes us bad people, the person who thinks so needs to check their privilege.

How much do you talk to other people about the choices? Do you think conventional wisdom has a place?
A place, definitely. Not necessarily a deciding vote though.

How do you support your student through the process of deciding - probably what would be one of their biggest decisions up to that point in their life?
Honesty, a little bit of nagging, and junk food.

At the end of the day, is it just going to be an emotional decision, or does logic have a place?
Gotta be logical first. Emotion gets teenagers-- and me, too!-- into far too much trouble.

18998

I finished my speech! Well the one for me. I still have to write introduction speeches for two ther people since they aren’t officers(despite the fact they are more than capable of writing it themselves :eyeroll:)

18999

@inn0v8r oh and he’s only attended/attending the accepted days of his top 3 choices (out of 9 acceptances). One is close and the other two gave him travel grants, so that was nice. Another accepted school offered a travel grant but he knew he probably wouldn’t choose it, so turned it down.

Nothing was on his list that he couldn’t see himself attending but the upshot of that decision is that two he got into we never visited. Everything else he’d been to at least once, but I do think there’s a different energy for admitted students’ events than for regular stop-and-tours. Not sure if ours is the most reasoned approach, but we’re lurching towards a decision.

19000

Re. post 973 @2manybooks, I know a student who is transferring out of Stanford for some reasons you stated. This student did not find peers that love to learn for the sake of learning, and instead found too many students who were just pursuing education for the outcome (high income). I’m not saying that is all the students by any means, but this student didn’t find the peers that had been hoped for.