Sounds like a number of posters here are having a mix of happy and sad moments lately. Feeling for you and wishing you well!
Son’s high school graduation ceremony was today. Weird feeling!
There were some sad moments, like the speech about a classmate who died of cancer, especially knowing that one of son’s best friends’ younger sister is being treated for a rare cancer and probably will die before her senior year. And my dad, who has Alzheimer’s, was having a tough day between the emotion of his grandson’s graduation and being really overwhelmed by the crowd leaving graduation.
Overall, though, I am just really happy that S had such a fun senior year with his friends, a year filled with new independence and lots of adventures. He had a wonderful year with school and activities, a great date for his prom on Wednesday, and a graduation trip two weeks ago with his friends, plus he got to sit and walk up for his diploma specially as part of the top ten students, and he is going to his top choice college next fall and is so excited for it!
Sorry, I didn’t mean to ghost the thread by asking a question and then disappearing. I was away, my ipad broke, and for whatever reason my iphone wouldn’t let me post onto CC.
Anyway, thank you everyone who responded about monthly expenses. It seems like there’s a big range from $50/mo to $500/mo. I can see where a big factor might be how close the kids are to off-campus food choices and how tasty (or not) campus food is. Also, the whole Starbucks thing, ug. At $5 per cup each (at least), we need to make sure this doesn’t become more than an occasional treat. And I’m definitely taking up the advice to set up a system on her credit card to let me know every single time that something is charged, so I can nip an issue in the bud rather than get sticker shock. Last year there was a thread here that someone’s kid, who had previously been responsible, charged $2,000 in a particular month on mom’s credit card. Son just didn’t realize how much he was spending.
My D filled out her schedule this week. In case there are any parents of the class of 2019 checking this thread out (wish I had done that), I want to pass on that I’m bummed out that her school the kids only take 4 classes a semester (not the trimester system, but regular, 2 semester system). She doesn’t mind at all, it’s me that’s bummed out about it. She’ll graduate with 8 classes less than someone going to a 5 class per semester school, and this can really impact your ability to double major or to try out different majors or classes. I guess if you went to a school that had a lot of core requirements you would be similarly limited. My point is, when you’re looking at what colleges to apply to, really think about what your schedule would look like at that school, to help you to decide if that’s a school you’d be happy at. For me, my kid is fine with the 4 classes a semester, and really, if she’s happy, I’m happy.
I had to drive through Elizabethtown today (and everyone on the CC planet knowns I’m a huge fan of Etown’s small, nurturing environment and I push it every chance I get!). I thought I would feel bad because I really wanted D18 to end up there. So it was nice to pass by and feel secure that D made the right decision in choosing Rowan.
I got to see D13 today and she is very content with her new job and small Midwestern town life and it shows. She just looks very happy and healthy. So I decided not to spoil anything by nagging about the medical stuff since we had so little time together.
@melvin123 Interesting thing you touch on with the 4 classes per semester thing. DD came back from her new student conference with only 4 classes on her slate for the fall semester. I was really rather shocked, as the parents sat in the back during group advising, that the students were encouraged to only take 4 (unless their scholarship.financial aid required more); roughly 12 hours a semester. At that rate it will take 5 years to graduate for a student entering with no prior credit (AP, DE etc). Clearly a boon for the university and a bust for the parental wallet. For DD entering with, at minimum, 21 credits (we will see if she picks up anymore from AP courses taken this year) not such a big deal; I am willing to let her go with 4 classes this semester, but 5 will be on deck starting Spring! I was surprised to find that most everyone else we know attending the same school only have 4 classes scheduled as well, I am not sure how I feel about this trend…?
Have got the car all packed, will hit the road in the morning. We’ll spend two days on holiday in the mountains then drop DD’18 off at Air Force in Thursday. Her high school friends saw her off on Saturday. Ready for a new chapter.
@melvin123 I actually prefer the 4 classes per semester. Yes, there are many more interesting classes to take than there is rooom for in the schedule. However, our experience with the schools we visited (yes, small sample size) was that kids at the 4 class/semester schools were a whole lot less stressed out than at the schools where kids needed 5/semester. My strongest interest is in my kids’ mental health and I hope that their learning does not begin and end with college classes. College will teach them how to think about things, how to analyze, write, etc. but they are not limited to the knowledge they glean and remember crammed into 4 years.
@labegg At Duke the freshmen are allowed to take no more than 4.5 credits the first semester (they do it a little differently, but 4.5 credits is basically 4.5 classes. My daughter is planning on taking Organic Chem, Calc 2, a required freshman engineering class and maybe a religion class and a half credit PE class for the rest. Since she is an engineering major, she does not have many core classes that are required (only 5 humanties/social science classes and 2 of them are being met by AP credits). After the first semester (or maybe end of freshman year) they can bump up to more than that. With that being said, even with only those 4.5 credits, I think its a pretty tough load for the first semester and am glad that they limit them, otherwise she would be taking more and pushing herself.
I would not be in favor of the 12 credits per semester. If living on campus, they are there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, so an awful lot of time to fill. I know many of DS’s friends who were within driving distance came home often, as they were bored at school.
DD does tend to get lost in the weeds, so her biggest adjustment is going to be working smarter, not harder. If she can learn to do that, she should have more than enough time for everything. She will not be coming home often as I don’t plan on anything other than the major holidays.
Of course, best laid plans and all…
@MACmiracle, so glad your D13 is thriving, and it is hard not to nag. I try so hard, but sometimes it just happens.
My DD is taking 18 credits - I gasped but her adviser suggested it, felt that her IB background prepared her well and it also gave some wiggle room should she need to drop a class.
She is taking, Calculus, Biology, Psychology, Japanese, a 1/2 semester class that is a university requirement and something else I don’t remember, possibly English. She will not be working and as @laralei said, on campus 24/7 with a lot of time to fill.
The most important thing, DD is totally comfortable with the course load
As S18 is gearing up for a late August departure, my youngest child suddenly announced yesterday that he was too old for Peppa Pig, because he’s almost 7! The double impact of both kids growing up, hit my husband hard.
I spent time looking through old elementary yearbooks with S18 last night. It was a great time! S had a lot of memories, comments, and stories about teachers, certain classes, etc. I didn’t schedule the mother son moment. I just started looking at them, and he came over to join me.
It depends on the major and what the classes are too.
My D took 3 classes totaling 13 credits in the first year, two sciences with lab, and foreign language.
In the second year she had 4 classes, one science with lab, ASL and psych/statistics. She also had a campus job and was an UTA. AP credits definitely helped, she got all of her pre-pharmacy requirements fulfilled in two years.
My S has 6-7 classes totaling 16 credits, plus two ensembles and a music lab at zero credit.
Yes, a student having a major with 120 credits for a bachelor’s degree, should stay on track with 15 credits a semester, but if you have some AP credit, you can possibly take fewer a semester.
@hopewhite25, wow, what engineering discipline requires organic chemistry (as a freshman)? I would be a bit worried about skipping general chemistry altogether, even with a strong chemistry student.
@mommdc It’s not required for engineering major, however she is planning on a second major in chemistry. She scored a 5 on the AP Chem exam and has been tutoring in all high school chemistry levels for the last two years and has also been spending the summer refreshing herself with chemistry, including using her older sister’s chem one and chem two books from another college.
I found out (late) that S18’s school is on a 4 class semester, but they have a January term that counts as one credit. I I hadn’t thought to look into it. D16’s school is not that way, which I thought was standard, and she has regularly taken 15+ hours/semester and it has been fine. I think the 4 classes/semester will work better for my son, especially since he’s in varsity sports. We’ll see!
Question: Is anyone imposing a minimum “time away” period? Example, we are less than an hour away from S’s college. He has a girlfriend who is staying local, and they are together all the time. School is a LAC and definitely not commuter.
We want (to force) him to stay at school for at least 6 weeks (but okay to come home Labor Day weekend). He’ll be in sports and will have to adjust to difficult schedule. He is very outgoing and makes friends easily, but won’t “follow the crowd.”
I think it makes absolute sense but I know he won’t.
DD school also only allows 4 classes first semesters. One is a required humanities class. DD also plays a sport so we will welcome the “fewer” academic hours, adjustment period for sport and more free time to meet friends. She is planning on double majoring so eventually she will need to take more than 4 classes a semester but not this fall.
@1399HdJ College coaches usually have rules about leaving campus. So, he will need to check with his coach. What season does he play Fall or Spring? DD will be staying at college until Thanksgiving. We are 2.5 hours away but I will be going to her “games” this fall so I will see her frequently.
DD is about 2+ hours away, on a good day with no traffic issues. I expect to bring her home for Thanksgiving, Xmas, Easter & spring break, and summer of course.
Moving past freshman year, I’m sure that will change. But there will not be any quick turnaround weekends unless there are circumstances that might warrant that.
She wants to study abroad and speaking w/ that program director, she suggests kids come in very early so they can make it the best possible experience with the least amount of disruption to their courses/semesters. I was more than willing to make this happen for my older two, but neither one took me up on it…youngest will!
@1399HdJ I have a loose requirement about staying on campus for the first 6 weeks. I also would like my DD to stay on campus for labor day weekend. I even wanted to institute a rule that her BF is not to visit for the first 4 weeks, but am meeting some resistance on that front. She is 2.5 hours from home.
She is planning on double majoring so eventually she will need to take more than 4 classes a semester but not this fall.