It’s the same in MA. Under 18 you can’t get a license without going to driving school and the schools are expensive (around $800 when my kids did it). The plus side is that a lot of the instruction on things like parallel parking are done with someone much better at it than I am!
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yep- we are in MA
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Also, office parks on the weekend. No traffic, but lots of roadways and opportunities to practice all kinds of stuff.
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For what it is worth, I think even if there is some of both types of motivation involved, that is perfectly fine. Like, to me there is no need to put yourself through this process for a low-probability school you do not even particularly like.
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This steering wheel is TOO COLD . . . .
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I hear you on this. D22 was completely uninterested in driving when she turned 15, as were all of her friends - it just doesn’t seem culturally relevant to them. We tried to force the issue, but eventually she just shut down and refused to complete the online modules required to get her permit. My wife was very concerned that she would go off to college without knowing how to drive.
But when she turned 18, all of a sudden she was ready and even made her own appointment to take the driving test. (Getting your license as an adult here in TX is a FAR simpler process than as a 16-yr-old.) In hindsight, we should’ve backed off and let her proceed at her own pace on driving. D26 is much more interested and is on track to get her license in a few months at age 16, but it was her decision.
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Both my kids got their license right when they turned 16. We’ve gone 2 and 4 years now with no accidents, I think it’s luck that they both hit that sweet spot of being cautious without being nervous. We also did 6 months of parking lot driving every weekend and 6 hours of behind the wheel driver training.
Most of their friends got theirs closer to 18 which does end up being much cheaper, no required driver training and insurance is a bit less.
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Although some insurances do give a discount for the training.
Don’t worry. That’s just Demonstrated Interest.
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Does car insurance include bear related damages? Asking for a friend …
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Sitting in the passenger seat while my kids drive ranks pretty high on my “least favorite parenting moments” list. D24 finally got her license, 18 months after she was eligible, and on her very first solo drive, she hit another car while pulling out of a parking spot. Yay. She hasn’t gotten back in the driver’s seat since. S26 is a much more competent driver, and is eager to get his license, but his ADHD makes driving with him very nerve-wrecking!! I do second/third the suggestion for professional driving lessons. We did them for both kids, but once those are done, it’s really all about time behind the wheel.
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DS got his driver’s license about 18 months ago and hasn’t driven since. Mostly, because he’s at BS. We put him back on our insurance last summer but he didn’t drive at all. He’s a good driver but parallel parking, which compromises of most of our parking in the city, makes me too nervous to let him drive on his own. He asked if he was getting a car when he graduates and I was heck no. Where he is going to college, he won’t need a car. Thank goodness.
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Adding to the driving conversation: we have 4 daughters (HS years '22, '24, '25, ‘25). Zero drivers. Not even the sophomore in college.
I figure I’m kind of fine paying for Ubers for her since it’s still way cheaper than a car + insurance + gas + parking + stress. I’m sure eventually someone will want to learn how to drive, but I’m certainly enjoying not paying for 4 teenagers on our car insurance until that day. :).
Also: D24 finished her final apps the other day just hours before taking off to go visit a sister studying abroad through SYA. It’s a great feeling. I did a final proofing of her essays before she hit send, and I fell in love with her all over again. I had helped her in early editing back this summer, but she did most of the heavy lifting on her own this semester (she is at a BS), and honestly, I had forgotten how much I loved her quirky take on things. What an amazing thing to get a front-row seat to our kids’ lives as they prepare to launch. :). Now, we just wait, and wait, me basking in the pink-parent-glow of thinking my child is extraordinary and I am so lucky to be part of her journey. (narrator: this will not last long because someone will probably ruin it by being a complete jerk by nightfall…) :).
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My DH has this week off of work. And in his spare time, he’s been bugging both D24 and I about where does D24 want to go to college. And it’s driving D24 & I bananas.
On top of that, all of the other people we encountered over Christmas asking D24 where is she going to college and she’s just about had it. I’m inclined to agree with her.
DH is frustrated that every time he bugs The Child with the “Where do you want to go?” question, she says 1 particular school. And then, this evening, he expressed concern about “all of these trips to visit colleges” and how much money it’s going to cost.
Um…it’s 3 2-night trips. For 2 of those, just D24 and I are going. The airfare has already been paid for. It’s not a huge undertaking. And the reason for these trips is specific. D24 is doing in-person vocal auditions for music performance scholarships at 3 schools. I’m pretty sure that 2 of the 3 schools will end up after financial aid as being affordable. So why wouldn’t we consider it?
D24 doesn’t have to make a decision for 4 more months. She told me earlier this week that she just wants everybody to stop bugging her about it because she doesn’t have much left of high school and she wants to enjoy it while she can.
DH has also been bugging D24 about how he thinks she should work more hours per week at her part-time job. She currently works 10-12 hours a week. It’s a good number for her and she’s been able to keep her grades up while doing so.
My DH really needs to take a chill pill! God help us all. 
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I have been telling people who ask about college choice, “he won’t know until April” and for major/field of study “he doesn’t really know what he wants to do.” That kind of ends that topic of convo, most of the ones asking are just asking to be polite, and really don’t actually care, more just being curious and polite. DS has heard me answer the questions this way, and he doesn’t seem phased at all. But maybe that is just his nature.
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Just make up some fake place anytime people ask you.
Utopia College.
It’s a small liberal arts school with a 2:1 teacher student ratio, great dorms with a Restoration Hardware vibe, fantastic food from a Michelin rated Chef, park like campus with happy squirrels, and a winning football and lacrosse team.
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Get him an account here. I bug family a lot less because I can kind of share/air out frustrations here.
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D24 submitted her last application this morning! This day is coming soon for all of our kids! In the spirit of closure for myself, I’ll do a little summary here. 14 colleges. 7 states. 6 test-optional applications. 14 supplemental essays (although some schools had none). 2 schools under 3K undergrads. 5 schools over 20K undergrads. 3 schools in towns under 200,000. 11 schools in cities. It’s gonna be a crazy ride!
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How did you determine which to go TO vs not. Sounds like a lot of great detail involved.
Congrats to you.
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If her score didn’t hit the 25th-75th percentile, then she went test-optional at those schools. We sent her actual AP scores to those schools, though, since they were all 5s. Sometimes, if a school “hinted” that it was favoring test-optional submissions for those below the 50th percentile (i.e., the school is trying to raise its official score profile), then we went test-optional even if she was above the 25th percentile. It’s definitely a guessing game with the borderline cases. With one of the schools, she’s been invited to the Honors College even though she submitted her SAT and it’s below the average for the Honors College. This makes me really proud of her and her writing skills/personal qualities. 
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