Had my honeymoon in Belize (half jungle, half reef). Unless the infrastructure has improved significantly I would not expect much in the way of cell service in the jungle. Have an amazing time! World will not end if you don’t know results immediately!!
For us, if #1 comes through we can skip everything else, it’s the clear favorite and should be the most affordable baring any big merit surprises. If 1&2 are denials, it will be a hard choice between 3/4 and their admitted student days are one day apart and 8 hour drive between them. I think we would go to the further away school that we are least familiar with. It’s a bit hard to worry about too much now as there are too many possibilities.
I think my S24’s deferral school is still his #1. I am pretty sure that I know 2 of his more likely ones are near the bottom of his 15. I also THINK he still really likes his almost-but-not-quite-ED-2 college, although I am not sure if he will be willing to commit there now if he doesn’t at least look at his unvisited reaches (in the event he is admitted, of course).
I am then actually quite unsure how the other 11 or so will shake out, including his two admits so far. So that could get “interesting” for Future Self, although of course I am hoping the reality of where S24 is admitted (and not admitted) will have some immediate clarifying effects on his thinking.
Over time, a #1 has emerged that is preferred by both D24 and her two parents. However, we won’t hear from that one until the end of March. There are two great schools to which she has been admitted (one target, one high safety) that are the other forerunners. The other 2 reach schools will report in mid-Feb and late March, respectively. It’s a weird time–she visits the high safety in mid-Feb, knowing it’s a likely choice, but not at all certain.
Sounds like a long wait for clarity, but maybe a quick decision after that (knock on wood).
Not to keep whining about my relative situation, but I was just thinking about how in addition to 12 admissions decisions, we are also waiting for a variety of possible merit decisions and an honors college decision.
I have also complained before about how my S24 seems allergic to merit, but I do wonder if a nice offer might help appeal to him just for ego/resume reasons. I could be grasping at straws, but we shall see.
Anyway, that’s a lot of decisions! There are a couple (relatively unlikely) scenarios where I think his mind would be made up very quickly, but otherwise . . . how fun.
In the end, you control the price - but hopefully in advance.
If a school comes in above that price, it’s automatically out - if you have a formal pruce desire.
But of course that needs discussion prior to application so that they don’t apply to schools like Brown ( if a family has no need).
Many gladly pay - and many will be like Fred Sanford in Sanford & Son - with a heart attack every time they go to pay 2x a year.
I could never pay full. It would have devastated me emotionally. But my kids knew up front and lists were built around this.
One came in at $81k - a selective liberal arts school with merit possibility. Removed with no need for discussion.
If you have concerns, it’s never too late to bring up.
We have absolutely seen this effect. A strong merit offer says, “we’re not just admitting you—we really want you!” I think it really does make a difference in how students perceive schools.
Please convey this to my kids?
One of my friends suggested that I have my daughter apply to Brown so I could use it as a financial bargaining chip at other schools. I said, “No!” She said, “Why not?” Me: “Because I don’t want to tell her no if she gets into an Ivy!” (Note: I also don’t think my friend knows exactly how the bargaining works) P.S. I also have a slight bias AGAINST Ivies (unicorn parent here), but that’s a long story that won’t be told on CC.
But is it too late to ED2 now?
Well right, but our deal was if he did well in school, he could pick his college and we will pay. Obviously we know we are lucky to be in that position, but for various reasons we are, and we personally see that as a reasonable deal in our circumstances.
But we did not say he HAD to choose the most expensive option. He just seems to have interpreted it that way.
I think this gets back to the de-programming some parents discussed upthread. If your base level for “good” college admission result is a Top 20…anything less, no matter how much money is thrown at you, might feel like a loss.
Also, if the budget had been set as “unlimited” if you do get into a super reach - it is hard for a 16, 17, 18 year old to be able to put merit money into any kind of perspective. Why would the kid care about getting a $45k merit scholarship if Dad and Mom have been saying, “Don’t worry about the cost of college - we’ve got it!”?
Random aside, but we also let S24 pick his high school, and he had pretty much already decided when they gave him a merit offer. So that’s my drawing-an-inside-straight possibility for college too, that he will inadvertently get merit somewhere he actually chose anyway.
But even though it actually really didn’t matter, it totally DID make an impression on him, and he still talks about it sometimes. And in some of his more lucid moments, he will at least acknowledge it could be cool.
So joking aside, it might well actually make a difference. Maybe.
To be clear - no shade directed to those parents/families who can pay full price and are willing to do so. Trying to make the point that late age teenagers aren’t always the most rational decision makers…and just don’t have many frames of reference to put large sums of money into perspective when making college decisions.
So just to be clear, he ultimately decided not to. He wanted to keep his deferred college as an option, and he also started being receptive to the idea that maybe he should wait and see what actually happens before making up his mind (a position which I certainly support, but I would not have forced on him).
This is 100% accurate. Their frontal lobes aren’t developed AND they have no sense of how much money merit can be - and what it could “buy” them later on
Even a not-strong merit offer has been a nice ego boost for D24.
Yep.
To be fair, his point is also that anything we save we’ll just spend on ourselves. That’s a lot of popcorn, but he has also seen the plans for that basement speakeasy I drew up . . . .
I’ve toyed with the idea of offering to put the difference in savings for him, but my wife actually doesn’t like that idea, and I kinda agree. It all gets very personal, but we actually do want him to feel pretty free to choose the best experience.
Still, my “compromise” has been to explain to him how unused 529 funds could become something that passed on to his kids some day. Since he just started his first serious relationship, that might be a tad premature, but I do wonder if things like that might at least get a more serious consideration once we are looking at actual final choices with actual costs.
Edit: Oh, and to be clear, we have 100% forced him to apply for scholarships where he was reasonably qualified (including meeting early deadlines). He can make his own choice in the end, but there is no way he is getting out of at least having the choice where possible.
So you’re saying he’s selfish?
Maybe it’s time for mom and dad to be too!!
Mine does. Mine is the child of 2 English profs, and therefore has her eye on the money.