Yeah, when my D24 was applying to college senior year, she got a lot of funny looks from people who meant well but were just using their own limited frame of reference as a comparison.
The first 1 or 2 times my D24 encountered it, she became really self conscious about some of the places she was applying to and it got really old having adults ask her literally all the time about where she was applying to college.
I’d heard a tip elsewhere (can’t remember where I heard or read about this) and told D24 about it and it really worked well.
So here’s the tip/suggestion:
You and/or your kid needs to come up with an ‘elevator speech.’ A short couple of sentences saying something interesting about Favorite College, about College Where Kid Will Attend, or Any Other College On The List.
For example, D24 applied to the following schools:
- ASU
- U of A (Arizona, not Alabama)
- Univ of New Mexico
- NMSU
- Centre College (in KY)
- Southwestern University (30 min from Austin, TX)
- Austin College (1 hr from Dallas, TX)
In the latter half of senior year, adults’ questions shifted from “where are you applying,” to “Where do you want to go?” After going on a couple of in-person visits to the 3 LACs, she changed her mind from “I’m going to U of A” to “It’s between Southwestern & Austin College + Centre College is a close 3rd.”
Hardly anybody we knew even knew these schools existed. So we’d get weird looks, you know where the person sort of squishes up their nose, and they’d say, “Oh…(long pause)…why would you want to go THERE?” One memorable adult royally put their foot in their mouth and actually said out loud, “Well, I’ve never heard of THOSE schools. They must not be very good.”
I was present for that one. At the time, D24 looked super mad, but kept her cool and was polite and stammered a bit trying to figure out what to say. So I spoke up and said this to set the Foolish Adult straight and politely put the person in their place:
“D24 really likes Austin College. They have a great pre-health program and right now, D24’s goal is to go to PA school down the road and they just started a PA graduate program this year. AND they have a really great track record of helping all of their students get research and internship experience as undergrads. It’s only an hour from the Dallas airport, so getting home won’t be a big deal. And she’s already received a big merit scholarship so the tuition, room & board is comparable to her attending an in state university. AND all of their classes are in person. Did you know that a lot of ASU and U of A classes now are hybrid or totally online?”
In that little brief moment, you end up redirecting the person’s attention. And then they’re curious about the college you’re talking about and ask for more info. AND they’re no longer asking how come your kid isn’t going to Harvard.
People would sometimes grimace when D24 would tell them that she’d applied to Univ of New Mexico. Some would even say, “Ew why would you want to apply THERE?”
They all shut up when I’d tell them that tuition, room & board was going to be cheaper than in state in AZ AND that it’s a pretty kick butt school if you want to be a film major since Netflix has a whole huge studio literally right next to campus AND the film majors often get film industry internships with Netflix as undergrads (D24 wasn’t going to be a film major but that’s beside the point).
I’ve already gotten lip from some adults about some of the places that D26 is applying. But since this is Kid #2 going through this, I’ve reached the point that I don’t give a rip anymore about what other people think of where my kid goes to college. It doesn’t matter that they think that my kid is applying to lousy/low-ranked colleges. Their opinions are none of my family’s business. They’re just uninformed.
MOST people have good intentions when they ask about this stuff. They just don’t realize how rude it sometimes can sound when they ask though. 
. The anticipation is still high though- so we are in the hurry up and wait part of the process with this one. Will be nice to get at least one early acceptance from her list.
