Parents of the HS Class of 2026

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Yep-she just added Steven’s to the list. :slightly_smiling_face:

I do not know what to expect on the outcome of this application- I think they like to see engagement and there has been none! And I do not know if we can get a visit worked in anytime soon.
Going to Ireland next month to look at Limerick and are starting to plan a really quick trip to see RIT. I don’t think I have enough in me (or vacation time) to visit anywhere else!!! :upside_down_face: :rofl:

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D26 has 10 schools on her list. One is a clear favorite, a highly rejective school, that she wants to apply ED (TBD). She has 3 additional reaches, 2 targets (one of these is also a favorite) and 4 safeties. We had not anticipated applying to that many schools, but we have some fee waivers and there are not very many supplemental essays among them. We have not visited all of them yet, however, so it is possible that one or more could fall off the list.

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First, my sympathies to everyone that is dealing with elderly parent issues. I have not lived near my parents since I moved to NYC in 1996. My mother and I were very close and I had a lot of guilt from not being there when she went through two bouts of cancer. The first involved chemotherapy but she was well enough to take herself to those appointments and even continued to work full time. She was in remission for almost 10 years before being diagnosed with cancer in her brain and legs. That was the time when she would have most needed me, but I live in PA, almost 1700 miles away. Luckily she had a very dedicated church group that was able to take her back and forth to appointments and D26 and I were able to get to spend a week with her a year ago in July. Unfortunately, her health declined more rapidly than anyone could have anticipated and she passed away before I could get back there with S23. It broke my heart.

Back to college stuff, D26 is a bundle of anxiety and it is exhausting. Despite one day of success, she is literally terrified to park at school. So now I am back to driving her until she feels comfortable- we will be practicing every day. Then of course the whole college thing- she constantly worries about choosing the wrong major, the wrong school, etc. She is completely frozen as far as writing her essay goes. And the biggest issue weighing her down is volleyball- she doesn’t play, doesn’t even get subbed in for practice, and there are a couple mean girls on the team- one of them even cropped her out of a picture of the seniors that they posted on TikTok, which of course D26 saw (and funnily enough, they actually used her arm on another girl on the end to make it look like no one was cut out :roll_eyes:).

Her list has narrowed down considerably. Right now she is applying to 6 schools, including the one where she was already accepted. To be honest, I don’t even know which are safeties, targets, or reaches because it all depends on how they figure out her GPA and how much importance they put on rigor of schedule. Hopefully they will see her strategic choices of classes to focus on her major as a postitive.

At our school, they apply first and then request the transcript- one for each college, at least 10 days before the application deadline. She did finally reach out to a core subject teacher and request a recommendation so that is one load off her mind.

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We have progress, though minimal, S26 finally started the Common App but only completed the personal info section. Essays have not been started, recommenders have not been contacted. He is driving me bonkers!!!

He is applying to 6 schools. One already accepted but still needs Honor’s College app essay.

I really think he doesn’t want to face the fact that High School will be over soon and that’s why he is procrastinating. Working on the apps is making it too real. That is just my very subjective reading of the situation. He keeps stressing how he wants to go away to college, is looking forward to it but then doesn’t do anything to make it happen. Boy I hate to keep nagging!!

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This 100%! I finally told D26 yesterday that I would stop bugging her about her essay until the last week in October. Let’s see if I can hold to it.

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Re: the volleyball team -
that whole situation sounds like it’s a miserable experience for her. Does the coach not even sub her in during practice? The mean girl behavior you described is flat out bullying behavior. Does she not get any play time during games either?

My kid doesn’t play any sports so I don’t know what the standard protocols are for high school sports. Does she HAVE to play out the rest of the season? When does volleyball season end?

I’m sorry that your daughter is having such a rough time right now. Just the college app process alone can feel really overwhelming. Last month, D26 felt really overwhelmed by it, too. Overwhelmed by how enormous all of the decisions felt.

Harlan Cohen (author who wrote ‘The Naked Roommate’; he has some really helpful reels on Instagram) recommends to consider switching one’s perspective from “where I go to college for the next 4 yr will determine whether or not I’m successful in the rest of my life” to “I’m going to do a 1 year experiment so where do I think is the best fit for me for next year?” …because it relieves some of the pressure since it helps you realize that guess what? If you totally hate something, you can ALWAYS change your mind and go elsewhere, change your major, etc. :slight_smile:

heck, my D24 is probably going to change her major and she’s a sophomore right now. Could all of our kids change their majors? Yes! Is it a big deal if they do? NO. :slight_smile: The trick is getting one’s kid to believe that changing your mind isn’t a big deal. That’s hard at times!

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1 thing I did when D24 was applying to college was partway through the process, I changed tactics and we set aside ONE 15-20 min time slot per week (we did it on Sun evenings) to talk college stuff.

During that 15-20 min (I’d set a time), that was the ONLY time each week that I was allowed to talk about college apps with her. So whatever we didn’t get to after 15 min, it had to wait until the following week.

Honestly, it worked out really well. D24 felt like I wasn’t nagging her as much. She felt like there was more than 1 conversation to talk about (i.e., we weren’t talking about college all the time). She said that switching it to 1x/week made her a lot less stressed out.

I DID give her assignments and things to do/work on between each Sunday 15-20 min session. And left it up to her for how she was going to organize herself & keep track of that.

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For a lot of kids, the Common App essay induces paralysis because they feel that it has to be everything - creative, informative, unique, funny, vulnerable…. and on and on. Some kids thrive on this and have a great time writing about the spider on the wall etc. But many, including my kids, just freeze.

Here is what worked wonderfully for S24, and is also helping S26. Do the activities list on the Common App first. Once they finish the list, they realize that the 150-character limit leaves huge gaps in describing all the wonderful things they care about and spend their time on. This makes them feel a lot better about writing a “boring essay” about their interests, goals, passions. They can ask themselves - what does this activities list fail to capture about me that I want people to know.

S26 is not writing the creative ‘blueberry muffin” essay, and that is fine. They are expanding on their interests, what they want to do with it in college and beyond, and what values drive their interest. S24 had fantastic application results with such an approach and his essays felt authentic and were in his voice. It is ok to write the basic essay and then spend time injecting humor, values, and style into it. For those who are not doing the UC apps, the PIQ prompts can be very helpful to get started on the Common App.

Just wanted to share what worked for both my boys, in case it helps someone.

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Yep, I have said to C26 that wherever you end up, one of two things will happen: (1) you’ll bloom where you’re planted or (2) if it’s not the right place for you, you’ll transfer to somewhere that suits you better. We know people who have done both, so I think that helps.

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I think D26 has 15 schools on her list. She’s applying to one ED; if she is rejected she plans to apply to another school ED2, but if she is deferred she will just apply RD to the second-favorite (and all the rest). A couple of her likelies seem to have EA and I think she will avail herself of that to the extent possible.

My D26 has 13 schools on her list right now, with 5 being reaches. Applying TO, so I feel like she should cast the net wide and see what sticks. Her school also moved from Naviance to Maia Learning recently, so they have zero data that might be helpful on her chances.

Is anyone’s kid doing a Glimpse video? Wondering if the admissions folks really look at those, or if they are worth the time to put together?

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yea, I’ve been thinking to ask him if I should just shut up about college apps. I keep going back and forth in my mind about it. But in the end it is my money that he is leaving on the table with his inaction, soooo that makes me keep nagging :wink:

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Oh boy- the volleyball saga that has taken over our lives! I won’t go into gory details but long story short, D26 was cut from the team along with another senior (which is not how it’s done at our school), the other parent made a very public Facebook post which received a lot of community reaction. The principal and school board also thought it was wrong that they were cut and the coach offered them their spots back. D26 said yes because she has been playing volleyball since she was 7 and she thought these girls were her friends. She has a lot of anxiety about school and they had always provided a safe haven for her. To be fair, it’s really only a couple that are being truly hateful, but that’s enough. As for the playing time, she was told that there would be very limited playing time, but the coach specifically said that she would be put in in the third set if they are demolishing the other team. Every game has been like that so far, but she has not played once. It’s embarrassing her that every girl on the team has been subbed in EXCEPT her. Could she drop out? Well, yes, but that would cause more issues for her than if she just sticks it out. Luckily it’s a fairly short season; the last game is October 20 and then playoffs. Chances are very strong that they won’t win districts, which will be the end (as only the district winner goes to states).

Whew- anyway! By November this will be in the rear mirror and she will be focused on musical tryouts!

And I went back to her list and she is actually applying to 11 schools. After Quinnipiac on Saturday, we are touring Stevenson University and Towson on October 1. Then we have to figure out how to fit in the three that are left.

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How totally irritating, maddening, and disappointing re: your D26’s volleyball experience! At least the volleyball season is soon over so she’ll be able to move on from that in about a month.

Are you sure the transcript request will even be processed if you have not applied to the college? My daughter’s school used Naviance and the transcripts were not sent until you sent the high school college counselor proof that you applied to the colleges. Same for recommendations. My son applied to his 9 schools over the weekend. His school uses Scoir so it is much more automated than Naviance. The common app is linked with Scoir so once he hit submit on the common app, it triggers his Transcript and recommendations being sent via Scoir. He almost instantaneously got messages from the colleges he applied to thanking him for applying in Scoir as soon as he hit submit on the Common App. He applied on Saturday/Sunday and this morning when he looked on Scoir, it showed that all documents had been transmitted to each college which made him feel less nervous that things hadn’t gone through properly.

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This is a good point - our school uses Maia, but it’s also synced to the common app, so likely follows a similar process.

C26 officially notified about NM commended status today. We knew they made the cutoff but it’s still nice to have it official. They will do a celebration thing for them at school when the certificates arrive.

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I’m so sorry :frowning: That completely stinks and I hope she ends up finding something fun out of it. Otherwise I wish she could just quit without it being worse!

D26 applied to 9, has gotten into 1 so far. Be cause she is applying for nursing, any of her direct admit schools, even if they “should” be targets or safeties are automatically reaches due to her choice of major. It stinks.

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Just did a spreadsheet of due dates and such for D26’s list. First, there are 14 schools on the consideration list, not the 13 I thought (I forgot one that got cut initially, then added back). Was pleasantly surprised to learn that at least 9 of the 14 have no application fee. Couldn’t quickly find whether there is a fee or not for two of them.

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