D26 is applying with test scores to everywhere but U of A because all of the schools but U of A have auto merit scholarships which either require test scores OR she’ll get more $$ by submitting the test scores that she currently has.
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Have you guys seen – on other threads here – people referring to colleges as “the one that got away?” Meaning the school their kid turned down from the accepted list that the parent is feeling wistful about?
Is anyone feeling that way about schools you thought would be perfect, but that your kid declined to apply to for some reason?
We did a deep dive this weekend into RPI and Stevens Institute of Technology, and they both checked a lot of boxes for D26, but she ultimately decided not to apply to either.
I’m not loving this decision – both could be a great fit for several reasons, and I want her to have options – but it’s her call, of course.
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Not with C26’s list as is, but in a different sense - I think there would have been a number of schools that could have been a good fit in many ways, but that don’t offer their major. It really has been quite a constraint in terms of where they could apply.
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Lots of schools like that for my D, too. And because she’s not 100% sure of her major, the school actually has to offer all of majors X, Y, Z, …
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D26 had that, too, with her niche major and marching/pep band requirements (plus additional constraints on size and type of band, lol). Add in geographical preference and the pool of possible schools dwindled quickly.
Which is why it kills me when she eliminates two really good ones for minor reasons!
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Not really the same as what you are asking for, but Bryn Mawr is almost certainly not going to make the final application list. I think it would be great for her and has so much overlap with what she loves about other schools on her list. In fairness to her though, after my wife convinced her to give Bryn Mawr a more serious look, the virtual information session we attended was pretty terrible. They didn’t highlight many of their strengths or uniquenesses and the admissions officer and the student were both kind of flat. Bryn Mawr has one of the oldest student honor codes, which is something my daughter likes, and they didn’t even mention it in info session.
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THIS! I thought D26 would love Bryn Mawr, but she had a similar reaction. They just talked up that kids gets jobs. It felt kind of weird - just very focused on the outcome versus what made them unique.
At any rate, D26 is likely to apply. She did the interview while we were there, and she loved Haverford, so the thinking is that there’s likely some similarities that might show up at an admitted students day if she gets in.
As for ones that got away, there are a couple of reach schools that I think have perfect programs for her that she’s just not interested in. She’s decided 100% not to apply to those, so my charms don’t work quite as well as I’d like!
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Yes! There are two schools that D26 is dead set against that I would love to see her attend. One is West Chester because it has such a college town vibe yet is right outside of a big city- which is EXACTLY what D26 wants. As a public, the cost would be much lower than the others on her list. And the other is Marywood because it has a very good film program and is 20 minutes away. It would be amazing to have her so close. She is vehemently opposed to both because so many kids from her school go to school there and she wants a brand new start.
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So disappointing. My D26 also loved Haverford which is part of the reason we felt she’d like Bryn Mawr a lot too. Ironically, most of the great praise and info we got about Bryn Mawr was from the Haverford tour guide! They did a way better job of selling Bryn Mawr than Bryn Mawr did.
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C26 is sure of their major, but - I know that so many students change their minds once they’re in college, and architecture has a high dropout rate, so I kind of further constrained the search by discouraging art schools (their counselor recommended a few), because if they do change their mind it is probably going to be in favor of something STEM oriented (engineering or maybe physics) rather than design or at least purely design-focused. So definitely wanted options open.
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Same story here – Cornell and Carnegie Mellon both have programs that are perfect on paper – but her reasoning is that she just doesn’t want to grind in college. And fair enough, I’ve seen her fall apart this year in an extremely challenging class that has a heavy workload, so she knows herself well. It kills me a little, though.
We have this going on with Georgia Tech. She still applied at my insistence – they are launching a new major that’s perfect, plus it’s so cheap for in-state applicants – but so many students from her school land there, and she wants a fresh start.
Well, that stinks. I have a high school friend who is a sociology professor at Bryn Mawr – he’s a great guy. I could try to connect you if you think it would be helpful.
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We will be empty-nesters. But I will be a coordinator for the exchange program so even though I won’t have any teens living with me, I’m sure teenagers will be in my house frequently lol. I will miss my daughter so much though. She’s an only child so she’s been kind of my world for 18 years. I’ve been working really hard to build up my own social life that doesn’t involve her. I’ve been trying to prepare lol. Running club and book club and game night with some work friends, etc..
As for big vacations, we will probably still wait until she’s off school and have her come. The only trip we’re thinking of going without her is to do some hiking at Mount Rainier. She hates hiking! But she’ll want to come when we go to Scotland to visit friends or when we eventually make our way to Thailand because white lotus 
. Those are all trips that are semi planned but no particular date yet.
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D26 was recruited by some really good grind schools which she categorically rejected, and that hurt my soul a bit.
D26 is also lukewarm about our state flagship school, she’s dragging her feet on her EA application, reason being, so many kids from her HS go there and she wants adventure in a new place. That also makes me sad, as my husband and I met in undergrad there and we loved our college experience. Alas, not for her.
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First app submitted last night!!! 
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Thanks for the offer but it doesn’t make sense to do that. She honestly has created an excellent list of schools for herself. The fact that Bryn Mawr is off the list (or at the bottom at best) is frankly their loss due to poor presentations. There is no point in us trying to force her to reconsider it again. At this point, there is little chance she’d pick it over other schools she is more likely to get into even if she applies. And I don’t want to have a battle with her over a school she’s unlikely to attend. We were successful in getting her to put Occidental back on the list (she had nothing negative about it, but felt their main unique points other than being in LA were not of interest to her, so it was just generic LAC for her). She was persuaded by our pitch for more solid CA choices just in case she decides she need to stay in state. So, I’ll take that W and move on. I still think Bryn Mawr is a great school, but it is what it is.
D26 quickly eliminated most of the grind schools as something she absolutely did not want (UC Berkeley was a hard no within minutes of the info session, and even Brown had too much of a kids trying to do too much vibe for her). Honestly, I am happy that she doesn’t want to go to those schools. Her high school is full of very lovely and cooperative kids who grind and it is not the best fit environment for her academically I don’t think. That she knows that makes me proud of her, and think she’s more likely to find success AND happiness. That said, Wellesley is still on the list despite its grindiness rep. The other features of the place outweighed that enough for her. It is a reach though, and even if she gets in, I don’t see her going there. It’s currently like 4th or 5th choice.
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Yeah… finally D26 finally pulled trigger on submitting three of her applications for the October 15th EA deadline yesterday.
She’s been sitting on them for about three weeks now but had some kind of FOMO thing going on “but what if I suddenly think of something new I want to say and I’ve already submitted it…”. I understand the idea of finishing something you think is great, but then taking a step back so you can take a break and come back to it a few days later to review it and then be “Yeah 100%” or “Oh no… I definitely went down a weird rabbithole there”. But three weeks wait and then planning to submit the day before the deadline was making me nauseous for her.
Now that the ‘seal has been broken’ she’s got another three to submit for the Nov 1st deadline already done and set to submit by end of week while she’s tackling the next three apps to follow those.
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I just need a place to shout into the void. If a school has the FAFSA paperwork AND the CSS paperwork - why the IDOC? I mean they HAVE that information in the FAFSA if they want to confirm it. 
Also - most of it was easy enough to find, but my daughter didn’t save her W2s from her work year as a 15-16 year old kid. I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to do about that.
ETA: OMG – we have located 2 of 3
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So much duplication. C26 has entered grades into common app, stars (which to be fair the system tried to populate from common app, but there were some major errors), a SRAR for one specific college, and will have to do it all over again for the CSU app. Surely in these days of AI, whether it’s financials or grades, the application system shoudnt need this unnecessary duplication all the time. It boggles my mind to think of the collective time waste of entering the same numbers again and again in a marginally different format.
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If you are in CA, the relevant parts of the CSU and UC apps shouldn’t be too terribly time consuming (unlike doing the Common App courses and grades, or the STARS), because they should have your HS’s classes in the system already and can autopopulate a lot of details.
My tip for making it smoother: Sometimes a student’s transcript shows course names or abbreviations that don’t pop up in the CSU or UC app. You can look up the “official” names of courses at your HS here: University of California A-G Course List
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S26 is on fall break today and tomorrow. After he spent a great weekend with friends, I told him last night that I expect essay drafts, 2 tonight and the rest tomorrow. He is so pushing it to the limit. He needs to complete a short essay for an LLC at the school he will, by my guess, most likely end up at. The housing portal opens 10/15. He also needs to complete honors college essay there. He still has no draft for common app essay nor the supplemental essay for his reach, which is due 11/1. Who wants to join me in screaming? 
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